Send Me An Angel
by RedRedRosy
Summary: Akatsuki hunting them, the remaining three members of Team Kakashi are forced to hide. With Kakashi healing and Naruto being unreasonably difficult, will Sakura be able to make it through? Kakasaku
1. Chapter 1

A/N: I've gone back in and messed with a few things. I'm not done doing it yet, because I'm pressed for time as it is, but I'll be going back through the chapters to make edits.

This was my first chapter fic with a pairing. I hope I didn't do too bad. It was fun.

Disclamier: I do not own Naruto.

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Send Me An Angel

Chapter One

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"I'm hurt and I'm tired. I want to go home," Sakura muttered beneath her breath. She had fought hard and this battle was weighing on her.

Naruto, Sakura, and Kakashi stood on a cliff overlooking their latest fight. The ground was covered in bodies and soaked with blood. The trees and rocks were lined with weapons and flesh. Kakashi's students were beaten, changed. They had never killed so ruthlessly. He couldn't say that in truth. He had fought in wars and countless battles. He was meant to kill, and he was meant to survive. Now he would make sure that these kids would be able to live after such an act as well.

He turned towards them and he could see Naruto's tears streaming down his young face, the liquid making marks on his dirty cheeks. Naruto's heart was too pure to commit assassinations without pain. It would be his weakness in the future. He would never be able to fight for the sake of killing. He would never be able to do what shinobi were born to do.

Sakura was sitting on her knees. Her head was cast downwards, to look upon the bodies of all those they murdered. Her face was pale and her eyes showed remorse and depression. She might break soon after they get back to the village, but she wouldn't it let stop her from completing her mission. She wouldn't let herself fall apart yet.

Kakashi looked down. "Let's get going."

He walked towards Sakura to help her to her feet as Naruto stepped forward to get one last look at everyone who died. Kakashi was still unaffected by their actions. He had done this many times and could no longer find himself crying at night because of it. Crying...he wondered when he had last done that.

All of it was simply in the past; no longer something to worry about because it had already been done. So he walked towards the forest that they would be traveling through. When he looked back he saw that Sakura was standing next to Naruto. They hadn't even begun to follow him.

He turned towards them but did not move from his position. They had fought all day and now were their only moments of peace. So he lifted his head to the sky to stare longingly towards the shining moon. He had never known why but the moon had always brought a measure of peace.

He felt like howling in its pure silver light, but thought better of it.

"We need to get moving. There could be more ninja coming to attack."

Naruto and Sakura looked towards Kakashi, that being the first time that their eyes had left the battle field. Sakura was the first to take a hesitant step towards Kakashi. He could now see everything so clearly, it was almost as though seeing through their very beings. He looked Sakura in her eyes, matching her gaze and found why she and Naruto were being so reluctant to continue their journey. She was scared.

They were afraid of him.

He looked down to see the shadows of the trees at his feet. He had never fought like that in front of them before. It was ruthless and savage. His right hand glowing with Chidori had been ripping through his opponents bodies in bloodlust.

His hand was still soaked with blood actually.

He looked towards them once more. "I told you I wouldn't let my comrades die." He tried to smile at them but the sorrow in their eyes only grew.

Sakura was the one willing to talk. "How could you have killed them so mercilessly Sensei? How could you?"

Kakashi's eyes were clear. "I did what I had to. Our mission is complete and everyone is safe. We can go home now."

Naruto couldn't take it. "Everyone is safe? Does killing over a hundred men really mean nothing to you? Does taking their lives, their futures, have no value in your heart?"

Naruto looked down, not willing to believe it. But his question had to be answered. "If your mission…was to kill us, would you go through with it? Could you murder us in cold blood like you did them… just because it was your _mission_?"

Kakashi looked Naruto straight in the eye. "I would die protecting you, not trying to kill you. Why would you ever think such a thing?"

They both looked down guiltily. Neither could tell him that it was because they had not seen their sensei tonight, but instead they had seen a cold warrior. They saw a man who didn't care if people lived or died, or even if it was his hands covered in their blood.

"I'm sorry, Sensei," Sakura said suddenly. "You were right. A shinobi's path is difficult and it can't be helped when you must kill someone." She smiled slightly, uncertainly. "I suppose death is always at your side, isn't it?"

It was a question not meant to be answered. Each of them knew that, but none were aware of how Kakashi viewed this slaughtering. He really had seen it has just another mission and perhaps that was wrong but…

"Naruto, Sakura, you're not wrong in blaming me for not caring much for these men's lives, but at least they were _men _you were killing. Once you've had to destroy an entire village and everyone inside, men - women, children, and even newborns - something like this doesn't seem so detestable anymore. I guess if I had the choice I would have chosen this battle sight to witness instead of kids' blood covering the very same dirt you walk on." He paused. "Let's go home."

Naruto and Sakura watched Kakashi's back as he was absorbed by the shadows of the forest. After what he had said, everything tonight didn't seem quite as bad as what he'd had to do. It made it slightly easier to live with, but the fact that their teacher had had to kill the way they had seen made everything seem that much more out of focus.

To Naruto, he wanted to comfort Kakashi, though he had no idea as to how. Kakashi had long since committed his vile acts and no longer needed to be consoled. Kakashi was not a man to let something hold him from his duties towards his village.

To Sakura, she couldn't believe that a man as respectable as Kakashi could actually go through with slaughtering children. From the rare times when a child had approached Kakashi she could tell that Kakashi had a soft spot for kids, especially the younger ones. To think that he would be able to kill an entire village was out of the question. It seemed unmistakable that Kakashi would have denied that mission and instead gone for something a little less bloody. But that's what scared Sakura; it was that it simply _seemed _unmistakable.

They may have known Kakashi for five years now, but they still knew very little of the mystery that he carried. It was something that they couldn't solve, and something that they wouldn't dare ask of. From what they knew, he was a simple man who would love to waste away a quiet afternoon under the shade of a tree reading porn.

But they knew nothing of what he was capable of.

When you can constantly take assassination missions and feel no regret about the ones that you've killed, when you can go on S-class missions and come home soaked in blood, when you can survive with no home or family and then feel nothing, then you can say that even those who know you are truly strangers; and that's what Sakura feared.

Kakashi was that type of person, and it wouldn't surprise her if half the things he did were beyond gut wrenching; but both she and Naruto still wanted to believe in Kakashi. They wanted to see him as the man they knew before tonight, so they silently followed him through the woods. They kept a safe distance behind him, knowing that now might not be the best time to speak to him, fully aware of what everyone had gone through.

It would have been much easier if Kakashi really was that simple old man who would love to read those stupid books on that quiet afternoon, but the truth was that he was so much more.

He was a leader, a ninja, a strategist, a teacher, a fighter, and then some. He was so many things to so many different people.

Naruto seemed to still think of Kakashi as part of his family, the one that was officially known as Squad Seven before it broke apart. Kakashi led that family, and guided them through tough times. They didn't have Sasuke back yet but there was no blame.

They just wanted Sasuke to come home.

Sakura turned her head towards Naruto to find that he was looking off into the endless forest; it truly was beautiful in the light of a full moon. She looked back at Kakashi. He hadn't so much as glanced back at them since they had started walking.

But then again she couldn't blame him. After telling them of killing those children it would be a surprise if that hadn't brought back bad memories for him. It must have been hard to do, looking down at an innocent face and then watching blood splatter across it.

It would have been traumatizing, but there were special people in the village that were designed to complete such tasks. Perhaps her sensei was one of them, one of those people who knew the secret of how to turn a heart to stone. It certainly would explain a lot. He had always seemed indifferent and aloof; maybe that was why.

Maybe he wasn't naturally that way. Maybe he had been specifically trained to do that. To not be noticed or seen in anyway and to be able to maintain that while completing a mission set forth to be accomplished in the most elegant of fashions.

Sakura decided that that was why Kakashi was the way he was. He was trained to be so, and if you were able to know the person behind that act then you would be able to know the true Hatake Kakashi.

But maybe she was just using her sensei's mysterious aura to let her imagination run wild, giving her a false hope that the murderer that they had seen tonight was not the Kakashi she thought she knew.

When she looked up she saw Kakashi pass under an open space among the trees and saw his form be bathed in sliver light. She saw that there really was much more to this man than may meet the eye. She could only hope that he would show those he cared about what he really was. She hated to think that he was hiding behind an act.

The more she thought about it the most frustrated she became. Kakashi was someone who didn't like people knowing much about him. He saw that people knowing him gave away his weaknesses, and perhaps it did. But he was even more afraid of becoming too attached to someone and then having them taken away. It was the one thing that his heart just couldn't handle. But she didn't know that.

He was sure that if that ever happened again that he wouldn't be able to come back from that pain like he had before. That it would be too much to bear and that he'd break under the pressure.

In truth he was afraid.

He was afraid of leaving this world the same way his father had. And if he were to leave in the exact same manner as Sakumo then he would have to look into the eyes of the person he held dearest and watch them scream and cry in agony as he took his own life.

He would never be able to ever feel happiness again if that happened. And the dreams of his father's suicide still haunted him. His father's eyes had shown so much remorse and so much guilt and pain. Kakashi had let him go, but his father's smile and soft goodbye was still painful to think about.

Kakashi unconsciously shook his head to clear his mind of the images that he could never quite forget. It wasn't that he would want to forget his father; he just wanted to be spared from his heart squeezing and that familiar ache in his chest returning, causing him to tremble under the emotion.

To him it felt worse than being stabbed in his stomach, and he could say so from experience. It felt as though you were dying from the inside, instead of from wounds inflicted from outer objects, and such a thing was frightening and painful.

He remembered all of it, even if he wished that he didn't; the night that he came home and found his father plunging the family tanto into his abdomen was a night that could never be erased from memory. It was a vision that haunted his mind from the moment he woke up at the hospital to be greeted by the Hokage after the incident had occurred - a vision that he still endured.

He had come home from his mission with his sensei, the future Yondaime, early to check on his father and to start dinner. When he arrived on the porch out of breath and grinning in anticipation of seeing Sakumo, he realized something was horribly wrong.

His father had not come to greet him.

Usually Sakumo would meet his son at the door whenever he arrived home to make sure that the young boy was without injury, but he had not shown himself today. Kakashi was about to toss it aside as Sakumo not being aware that he was home, since Kakashi _was_ home early, but something that simple would never cause his father to be unaware. Sakumo's skills may have dropped considerably but he could still tell when someone appeared at his home. Even if he had been robbed of both his hearing and his sight he could still tell that someone had arrived by using his nose, similar to the same use of an Inuzuka.

Kakashi dropped his bag on the porch and immediately ran inside, seeking to find his father. He ignored taking off his shoes and went straight to his father's room. Scrolls lay scattered across the floor; dozens of papers with complicated notes sat on his desk, and pictures of dead family, old friends, and assassination targets that had long since been taken care of circled Sakumo who sat on his knees approximately six feet from the bed or the desk.

Sakumo looked up from where his hands had gripped his family's heritage tightly to acknowledge his son who stood in the doorway to his left. Sakumo felt his lips turn upwards to form a long since forgotten smile.

His son was not wearing his mask today, so Sakumo could see the pure horror that streamed down across it. Even at the sight of his son's despair Sakumo's smile did not fade, it did not diminish as it had before when he had seen that look in the past, and it did not waver in doubt of his decision. It just grew slightly and his eyes showed the truth of his soul for his young child to read.

_Please, don't be like me, _Sakumo prayed as his thrust his blade into his flesh. Sakumo heard Kakashi let out the most fearsome scream he had ever heard from his silver haired protégé and felt the boy grab him and try to stop things from occurring. _Poor Kakashi, _he thought. _You can't change Fate. _

The last thing that Sakumo Would hear or feel when he had died was his son's crying and the wetness of tears on his shoulder. It had not been his first choice of how he wished to die, but he was more than willing to end it all in that fashion.

That had been the only night that Kakashi was able to read his father's soul. It was desperate and fragile, but so protective. He was dying for a purpose and he wished Kakashi all the best in the future - one he would no longer be attending.

Kakashi never understood what it was that his father died for, and that made his death so much more painful. It caused Kakashi to see the life of a shinobi differently and to see that it was not simply duty and honor that occurred everyday; there was also shame.

A part of him was aware that he had inherited a piece of that same dishonor that had destroyed his father. And another part of him was aware that he would never again allow it to hurt him. If he were to be disgraced or were to be discarded by the village that he would give anything to defend then he would live on gracefully.

He knew that the only thing that could hurt him would be losing those that he held dear. It would haunt him; knowing that he wasn't able to save them and coming to believe that he would never be able to. That's something that would make him bend to human weaknesses and kill himself in the same manner his father did, but for a different purpose.

Maybe history really does repeat itself and there's no way to escape it. The Sannin were now remade in his former students, and he was well on the path to becoming just another Konoha shinobi to die a useless, forgotten death.

Or maybe he'd end up like his sensei and die a hero. One could always dream.

Kakashi stopped walking, startling the two following him; they were not expecting him to stop after traveling for only an hour. They still stood over ten feet behind him, but they could tell that he was not at all troubled. He raised his head to smile towards the sky in a gesture that could only mean he was at peace in that moment. He caught sight of the moon and his smile widened.

It was so full tonight and so beautiful. Kakashi always thought that the moon was the only thing that lay in common between killers. He believed that shinobi who were considered to be among the deadliest usually saw the moon as something of a median. It tranquilized a soul and gave peace to those who were burdened. Or maybe it was just that silly wolf playing tricks on his mind. He should have never learned to summon that _thing._ It only ever caused him trouble.

A wolf with silver fur that glistened and howled in the light of the full moon was what he could not control. It was a jutsu to summon not a dog but a wolf. It was to be taught from parent to child or to teacher to student, depending on the situations.

Kakashi had been taught this jutsu by neither his father nor his teacher. He had found a single scroll in his father's room that interested him. It had been pure black and had been laid out on his father's bed.

Apparently Sakumo had meant for Kakashi to find it. He wanted his son to learn of this technique. Kakashi was young and didn't fully understand. It wasn't until he had perfected the new jutsu and used it in battle that he questioned whether he should use it at all. It was powerful and deadly but it involved another spirit entering your body.

That didn't sit well with Kakashi. Another spirit controlling his actions was not something that he enjoyed. He found that it was not him fighting but another being defeating _his _enemy. Kakashi realized long ago that he loved to fight. He still enjoyed the adrenaline that ran through his body during a battle.

When his heart was pumping hard and his brain racing to find an attack that would finish his opponent, all the while keeping in mind his enemy's techniques and advantages. He loved being at least four steps ahead of his attacker and loved being the one who was declared strongest. Avoiding it was good if it was possible, but if you had to fight then you may as well enjoy it. He had grown out of enjoying taking his enemies' lives but for some reason he still enjoyed the fight.

That joy was stolen when another spirit fought in your place.

Kakashi closed his eyes and allowed the night breeze to ruffle his hair and felt a chill run up his spine from the sudden change in temperature. He turned to face Naruto and Sakura who were now prepared for anything. They might have lost their trust in him tonight.

That was all right with him.

But when he smiled at them it seemed like all was forgiven in Naruto's eyes. Sakura was still visibly wary but was more relaxed. It's funny how a single smile could change the atmosphere from unbearable tension to relaxed friendliness.

Naruto turned towards Sakura. "See Sakura? Kakashi-sensei's still the same guy."

Naruto grinned and started to walk towards Kakashi; Sakura hadn't moved from her position. Was he really the same? Had he changed? Could they trust him? Were they in danger?

"C'mon Sakura, Sensei says that we're making camp here!" Naruto called out. Sakura stared at them with a worried expression. Kakashi smiled at her and all doubt was erased.

He may have killed mercilessly, without a single regret, but he was still Kakashi-sensei and he was still their protector. He would never go back on his promise.

"_I don't let my comrades die."_

He would protect them with his life. She smiled back and began to jog over to her remaining teammates. They would always protect each other, even if one could be ruthless at times.

Naruto and Kakashi had gathered firewood while Sakura retrieved water from a nearby river. They were to meet back in about half an hour.

Kakashi and Naruto had returned before Sakura since they had less distance to cover, and considering how tiring their battle had been they weren't expecting Sakura to rush. It would be better if everyone took it easy for a while. Their muscles were already going to be sore as it was so they might as well make it less painful by resting up a bit.

Kakashi placed some fair sized rocks in a circle formation to keep the flames from spreading and causing a wild fire. Once that was done he and Naruto placed the sticks and logs into the circle before stepping back to start the fire.

Kakashi used a small fire ball jutsu to ignite the flame. There was a warm orange-yellow glow that followed soon afterwards. As the fire grew so did the length of the light. There wasn't much smoke coming from the fire and Kakashi explained that he had cast another jutsu that lessened the smoke by casting the jutsu on the wood itself. He also explained that he did this just to be careful. Even though it _was_ night and they _had _killed most of the enemies there was still a chance that the few remaining enemies could smell the smoke coming from the fire and thus giving away their location. Not to mention that one might see it in the sky.

"Hey Sensei, hasn't Sakura been acting a little weird lately?" Naruto asked.

"What do you mean?"

"Well, you know." Naruto's face became a bit more serious and took on a worried look. "She hasn't acted the same around you since that battle. I'm just a bit scared that we'll never be the same." Naruto looked towards Kakashi. "What do you think?"

Kakashi used a stick to gently push the logs in the fire. "I think that you were both frightened." Kakashi smiled. "But I'm sure that everything will be fine. You're both strong. I'm not worried a bit. You'll pull through."

"Yeah, you're right," Naruto grinned. "Thanks, Kakashi-sensei."

"Sure thing," Kakashi said offhandedly. Although he wasn't worried that everything would return to normal shortly, he was beginning to worry about Sakura. She had left over forty minutes ago.

"You always know what to say Sensei."

Naruto's face took on a mischievous expression. Kakashi was looking off into the woods in the direction that Sakura had left. Naruto grabbed a kunai from his holster and threw it into the fire. The result being a lost kunai and a startled Kakashi.

When Kakashi jumped at the unexpected sound and burst of flames Naruto took the opportunity to push Kakashi off of the log they had been sitting on.

It had rained the day before and the ground was still mildly damp, meaning that it was _cold. _Kakashi jumped again at his bottom's change from comfortable warmth to a freezing cold ass. Naruto burst out laughing at his old teacher's reactions.

Tricking Kakashi was not something he was able to do normally so he had to take the opportunity when it presented itself; which usually involved a period of time when Kakashi was injured.

Kakashi got off the ground and found a nearby rock to sit on. It was slightly chilled but better than whatever small puddle the copy nin had landed in. Kakashi gave an annoyed glare to Naruto, though it was not a glare that was delivered from someone who was truly angry. It was more of a glare that you gave a person in slight competition. If Naruto hadn't been laughing so hard he might have seen that and he might have known to be precarious of what trick Kakashi might pull against him.

Naruto finally stopped laughing when Sakura hit him on the head to announce her arrival. Apparently Naruto had been too busy laughing at something and Kakashi was too busy plotting something against Naruto.

"So, what's going on?" Sakura asked as she handed both boys their respective canteens.

"Oh nothing, we started a fire, we talked, Kakashi fell on his ass," Naruto said in a boring tone.

"He did what?" Sakura asked in disbelief.

Naruto started laughing again so Sakura turned to Kakashi for answers, though she couldn't say she was expecting much of one. "He pushed me."

Sakura raised her eyebrows. "And he managed to get you to fall?"

Kakashi gave Sakura a mild glare - just enough to tell her that he really _was _embarrassed about it. Sakura smiled and let out a giggle imagining the act of Naruto pushing an unprepared Hatake Kakashi into a puddle.

It got funnier when Kakashi got up and started walking towards the woods.

"Where are you going Sensei?" Sakura asked trying to suppress her rising laughter.

"Well, I was going to wipe this mud off," Kakashi answered as he turned to face her. "What are you doing looking at my butt for anyway?" he asked realizing why she was laughing harder.

Sakura blushed slightly. "Well my, uh, eye caught sight of the mud."

"Right, well, I'll be back in a minute."

Sakura joined Naruto in their fit of laughter. Kakashi had mud caked across his bottom. It had been quite a sight, but Kakashi acted so normal that it took away most of the humor that should have accompanied the vision. Eventually they calmed down and began a conversation to pass time until Kakashi showed up.

"Naruto that was a pretty mean thing to do," Sakura said with a smile still on her face.

"Maybe, but how often can we prank Kakashi-sensei? I had to take the only chance I had, and it turned out to be worth it."

"I would've killed you if you'd done that to me."

"But this only proves that Kakashi-sensei is _still _Kakashi-sensei. Right, Sakura?"

Sakura looked at Naruto a bit impressed. She had never thought of putting Kakashi in a situation of embarrassment to see if he would have reacted the same way.

"You know what Naruto?"

"What?"

"You really do have your moments."

"That's what I've been telling everyone," Naruto said, taking a compliment too far. "I'm super smart and super strong and super sexy and nobody ever notices and-"

"What's all the commotion?" Kakashi asked.

"Oh Sensei, you're back," Sakura said. She hadn't felt his presence at all. Kakashi was always on guard. It was almost too much for her to bear.

"What's Naruto rambling on about?" Kakashi rephrased.

"Nothing, as usual," Sakura said with a sigh. Sometimes her blond teammate was just too much to handle as well.

Kakashi sat back on his rock. "Hn. I'm going to guard tonight. We're heading back out early, so no complaining when I tell you to get up. I want to make it back to Konoha to report to Tsunade as soon as possible."

Now that sounded more like Kakashi; demanding, hard, firm, and deep. He always held a tone in his voice that gave him authority. After training under him for a month Sakura could tell what he wanted them to act like based on the underlining silkiness that he used. If he wanted you to behave and follow his orders without question, which is the way it was most of the time, it would be boring and short. If he felt playful he'd use more words and his voice would be lighter.

Sakura flopped down on a soft patch of grass. Although the soil was still damp the blades of grass were mostly dry. They didn't have anything to sleep with. All had been lost in their battle. Sakura rolled onto her side, listening to the comfortable grunt Naruto released when he dropped to the earth for a long night's rest. She tried to hear Kakashi's movement, but she waited a few moments in silence. Turning her head to the side she saw that he had already moved, but he had made no noise.

That put on her edge again. She couldn't help it. Meeting him as a child you're stunned in amazement at his power because he's your protector. But knowing him when you get to fight alongside him, that's a different story. She closed her eyes in an attempt to shut it out, but she was only met with short flashbacks of the fight she wished to forget.

Kakashi rushing through a crowd, ripping men in half as he ran; Kakashi summoning dogs to bite and nip other humans to death; Kakashi breaking necks with swift kicks when his chakra finally depleted itself. She couldn't understand how the man she admired most could destroy so much. He had given everything he had just to kill.

She was a medic. Her job was to _save. _Watching her leader murder without pause, or mercy, or even a slight hesitation had given birth to a fear inside her. She knew that Kakashi had been working as a ninja since before she was born. She didn't know exactly how long, but that didn't matter. She was almost an adult now, and that gave Kakashi a good seventeen years of shinobi life. Sakura hugged herself to get warm.

She wanted to cry, but she wouldn't let herself have that indulgence. After being trained by Tsunade Sakura had been able to control her emotions so much better that she had even impressed Kakashi. She knew because he had told her once. He had complimented her on her jutsu, and her intelligence, and her humanity on the day she became a Jounin. It was a bittersweet celebration now that she thought back on it, laying there the night after her very first mission since her promotion.

Was his first mission as an elite so dreadful?

Sakura couldn't stop herself when she felt a warm wetness caress her cheek, a tear, another running slowly across her nose because of her sideways position. She opened her stunning eyes to stare at her hand, her slim fingers trembling.

Perhaps she wasn't as strong as people thought.

She shivered, knowing that it had something to do with the emotion but also because of the breeze that had cut through the trees. She was cold, and hurt, and desperate.

Feeling more than hearing the soft foot steps infront of her she set up, wiping her tears away to be greeted by a worried masked face of someone who she held dear. "Are you all right, Sakura?" Kakashi asked sincerely.

She nodded automatically. When Kakashi asks if you're all right the correct answer is yes, you are. She felt ashamed and embarrassed. After something so trivial she was broken, when he had been through so much more. _He _was still useful.

"No, you're not," Kakashi accused softly. Watching her pink strands sway when her head jerked back towards him, he couldn't help but smile. "You're lying to me Sakura."

Sakura expression was hard to read for even the copy nin. It was borderline worry, but held a reluctant acceptance. He was grateful to have been able to train these kids. No matter how he felt about protecting his heart, he had opened it to them without anyone's knowledge; not even his own.

"I'm just cold," Sakura said helplessly. Telling him the truth would be like stating the obvious. Kakashi could see her fear a mile away. He always had.

"Oh." He crouched down. "I thought it was something else." He smiled again, knowing that this small game would only last so long. "Here," he said shifting out of his vest, which was splattered with blood that she didn't want to see.

She watched him drop his green flak jacket to the ground, then reach for the ends of his shirt, pulling it over his head. He wore a navy blue tight fitting sleeveless shirt underneath, complete with an attached mask. Sakura could clearly see his hidden muscles. Though he may look skinny and slim Kakashi actually had quite a built figure. He offered her his shirt soundlessly, and she accepted with an unsteady right hand.

"But won't you be cold?" she asked. It was her own way of trying to turn away his generosity but she continued to sit on her knees and wait for his comeback. If Kakashi was willing to give something up to someone else then they _weren't_ going to say no.

"Maybe." He shrugged with a smile. "But I'm used to it." He picked up his jacket and threw it over his shoulder. As far as she could tell what he said proved to be the truth. The icy wind biting at his skin didn't affect him at all.

She looked down at the dark cloth still in her hands - she hadn't decided. But it wasn't like she had a choice. Kakashi was almost as stubborn as Naruto was. Maybe even Tsunade. She sighed. "But…"

Kakashi shook his head. "Sakura I went to the Land of Snow in an Anbu uniform and a scarf. I'm sure I'll live one night in a chilly forest." He said it as though it were a joke, but she could tell that he was serious, so she smiled.

"Thanks, Sensei," she said with honest gratitude. The shirt was still warm and felt so inviting that she almost couldn't resist. Besides, what could it hurt?

Kakashi chuckled and ruffled her cherry locks. "'Bout time." He felt much better now that she wasn't crying and trembling. It broke him in two to see her like that. Cocking his head to the side in a playful manner as he drew back his hand and his grin resided into a smile. "Good night, Sakura."

"Good night, Kakashi-sensei," she answered with a warm upturn of her lips. He was still the same guy, no matter what side of him had been revealed that night. One moment he was a ruthless killer and the next he was a gentle friend. He stood up and put one hand in his pocket while letting the other limply hold his vest over his shoulder. She watched him and felt that familiar sense of being in the closely knit Squad Seven family. Her boys never let her down when she needed it, and Kakashi was no exception.

When she saw him reach the base of the tree, she turned back around and sat with her legs crossed. Slipping the cooling fabric over her arms first she pulled it over her head, noticing how long it actually was. Kakashi kept it tucked in most of the time, she'd only seen it untucked a few times, and even then it still only fell slightly past his hips. It almost reached her knees and the sleeves were sloppily rolled up, just passing her wrists.

She immediately felt better without the cold nipping at her bare arms and lay back down. She saw how pale her skin looked against the dark colored shirt and realized belatedly that Kakashi really wasn't as pale as people thought him to be. He was darker than her. Her creamy skin standing out against the shirt told her this. In the night's limited light the shirt almost looked black. Put that with Kakashi's whitish-silver hair in the dead of night, you coudn' helpt but think that the copy nin was as pale as the last surviving Uchiha.

She unrolled the sleeves over her hands and clenched it in her fists. Turning back on her side she brought her hands close to her body, adding to the warmth. She lay there for a few peaceful moments, until she noticed the difference of smell. It smelled like Kakashi.

She knew the scent only from the few times when he had had to carry her because of an injury or lack of chakra, or for other reasons that she couldn't think of at the moment. It was a pleasant smell. It wasn't contaminated with cigarette smoke, like Asuma, and wasn't covered in a fake scent, like Kurenai, and wasn't dirty, like Naruto. It was simple and untouched. She could almost smell the sweat and blood and dog that had covered him during the battle, but chose to simply ignore it.

Kakashi's scent was better anyway. Soon enough it lulled her into an undisturbed sleep. It left her hoping that everything would stay the same, though she knew that it wouldn't. They would continue to see the countless pieces of Kakashi's personality that made him who he was. Living in ignorance was something that she despised. She had worked for years to get out of that bottomless pit and she would never return.

Maybe knowing the real Kakashi wouldn't be so bad. Like Naruto said, he's still the same guy. This side was just hiding.

Sakura fell into the darkness begging to take over. Sleep had won their small, irrational battle. She knew it would.

But she didn't know that she didn't understand anything.


	2. Chapter 2

A/N: Sparing you the details...

* * *

Send Me An Angel

Chapter Two: Getting Back

* * *

The sun stretched out across the land, warming it with a gentle glow. Two people slept soundly in the forest beneath it, while another watched it rise. The birds began to chirp in tune with the world waking up to greet the new day. Kakashi lay back in relaxation.

He had told Naruto and Sakura that he would wake them up at 5 _a.m._ but the idiots never realized that he didn't have a clock. Even so, he was positive that it was at least past 6. He stood up, stretching his muscles and popping his back. He was exhausted. He had fought all day yesterday and didn't even get a minute of sleep last night.

He blames himself for that though. He offered to stay on guard duty all night so he rightfully took the fault. When he got home he was taking two days off and the first thing he was going to do was a take a three hour bath. Steaming hot and soothing his aching body. He sighed, knowing that his dream would have to wait because first he had to wake up his teammates and _then_make the travel back to Konoha.

His day already seemed too long and the sun had only just risen.

Hopping down to the earth that rested below him, as he had been sitting in a tree most of the night, he started walking over to his pink haired former student. He vaguely noticed that he had forgotten he gave her his shirt sometime last night when he was trying to read his perverted book in the moonlight. It proved to be a wasted effort so he had used the fire's light instead.

He looked down at her cuddled in his dark shirt, her short hair sprayed out in all directions, and her long eyelashes softly fluttering. She was waking up, but she had looked so peaceful.

"Good morning Sakura," Kakashi greeted with a smile, only to be tuned out when she sat up and turned her head towards Naruto, his snoring blocking out the world.

Sakura hated mornings, and her teammates had learned that quite early. Kakashi was always the one who was stuck waking her up because the other two refused. Naruto out of fear and Sasuke out of not wanting her to think of it as something more, but Kakashi figured that was just fear too.

Over time she had become overly accustomed to his soft words of waking, and ended up awake before he had the chance to speak. She groaned loudly into her hands, which were still covered in her Sensei's shirt. Her head snapped back in her realization and she quickly began to take it off.

Kakashi looked surprised, and stopped her by laying his hand on her arm with a warm chuckle. "Sakura it's alright. I don't mind."

She pushed the fabric just low enough to uncover her eyes and stayed in something of a pause, causing Kakashi to laugh at her repeated hesitation. "It's still cold out here anyway," he reasoned.

She pulled the shirt all the way back down to pool at her hips. With a light blush on her cheeks she thanked him, standing up to do her regular routine in the 'get your ass up' order. Whoever was up would wake up Kakashi, if he wasn't already awake. He'd wake up Sakura, and then force her to wake up Naruto. When Sasuke was with them he'd usually wake up sometime during the loud routine.

The one time Kakashi had tried waking up the young blond he had gotten so annoyed at Naruto's dead sleep that he had kicked the boy in his ribs. Naruto had been walking with a limp the rest of the way back to the village that morning. No one had ever figured out if it was because Kakashi had accidentally kicked Naruto in his hip instead of his ribs or if that was just Naruto's way of showing his pain.

She crouched down beside her hyperactive knucklehead and softly tapped his cheek. Naruto stirred but remained asleep.

"C'mon idiot, we gotta get moving."

He didn't even flinch.

"I'll call Kakashi," she threatened and watched him spring up like she had sat a ghost after him. It was really too easy.

Naruto yawned with exaggeration, but that was his way of doing things. Sakura's half hearted threat meant nothing to him, as he was far to used to it to care any more. He plopped back down, letting the fall alone pop his joints and stretch his muscles. Turning his eyes back to Sakura he noticed something different.

"Is that a new dress?" he asked sleepily.

Sakura smiled, understanding why he'd think such a thing. After all, Kakashi's shirt covered her from her neck to just above her knees. It hid her outfit beneath it, leaving only her shin guards and shoes visible.

She shook her head. "No, silly, it's Kakashi-sensei's shirt."

He sprung up again and she couldn't help but giggle. Messing with Naruto was always fun, and she could tell that Kakashi was finally walking towards the two, his lazy expression in place.

"Kakashi…-sensei's…what?" he asked staring at her and observing every detail of the shirt. Sure enough, when he saw Kakashi missing a large part of his clothing, Naruto was convinced.

"Why are you wearing Kakashi-sensei's shirt?" he screamed in horror, obviously getting the wrong idea. Sakura laughed again and she could hear Kakashi's deep chuckle come from behind her, getting louder as he approached them.

Naruto's eyes narrowed. "You pervert!" he yelled with blind fury.

Kakashi let himself fall to the ground, his legs half crossed and half stretched as Naruto's punch flew threw his wild locks.

"It's not what you think," he tried to explain but the amusement in his voice and his poor choice of words only served to further encourage Naruto's rampage.

"Sensei let me hold it last night because it was cold," Sakura said in defense before her best friend could start anything with their former teacher, even though he'd probably lose.

Naruto stopped. "Because it was cold?"

She nodded. "Yeah, you didn't notice because you have that jacket on."

"Oh," he said. He looked sideways at Sakura, and then back to Kakashi. Scratching the back of his head he laughed nervously. "No hard feelings right?" he asked Kakashi.

Kakashi stood up and shrugged, walking around the goofball to finish up his job of hiding their evidence of camp, hence the fire's ashes. As he expertly kicked the last of the needed soil on top he turned back around and brushed his hands together to clean off the dirt. "Maybe," he answered late with an outward tone of sarcasm.

He grabbed his vest from the low branch he had hung it on the night prior and slid it on with ease. He left it unzipped callously and began to walk. "Let's go," he called behind him. He really did want to get home soon.

It had been hours since they had started their journey back to the village and the heat was increasing by the moment. Kakashi was walking, not jumping through the trees, but _walking. _It only added on to the heat after lugging behind him for five hours. Sakura slipped out of the dark shirt, Naruto following suit with his jacket soon afterwards.

She jogged ahead to catch up with Kakashi, who was walking at a faster pace than his students' cared for. She held out the shirt with a quiet, "Here."

Kakashi laughed at her. "I don't want that." It was hot outside and if he had been wearing it in the first place then it would never come off, but with it already being off what was the point of putting it on?

She narrowed her bright green eyes. "Well I don't either." Sakura hated the heat as much as she hated the cold. That's why she loved autumn, it wasn't too hot and it wasn't too cold.

Kakashi shrugged, something he had been doing quite often lately. "Well then just tie it around your waist."

Sakura looked insulted and wary. "No way in hell you perv!"

She had obviously taken the wrong idea. Why were his students so dirty minded? He only found another reason to blame himself that morning in realizing that reading porn in front of them when they were children would no doubt have some sort of effect.

Or maybe they just thought him to be dirty. Now that was insulting.

"Sakura it's the easiest way to hold onto it without getting hot," he explained, but from the look she gave him he could tell that she wanted him to do it instead. "And I am _not_ gonna wear it like that. It's a woman's style."

Sakura stuck her nose in the air in defiance, but her hands each grabbed one of the long sleeves, wrapping it around her hips and tying it securely in the front. "Fine," she said harshly, but in a way that only Sakura could pull off.

The shirt was still rather long and covered her lower half like a skirt. It wasn't an unpleasant sight, Kakashi decided, but it was quite humorous. Sakura's hips swayed and the shirt held no reluctance to follow.

Naruto ran up and put a hand on Kakashi's shoulder, peeking over his tall sensei to stare at Sakura's butt. Kakashi looked back and forth between the two, something finally clicking in his supposedly genius mind, and shot Naruto a warning glance. It was more of a man's warning that he was about to get caught with that oncoming nose bleed that seemed inevitable. But it was also meant to warn Naruto to stop it.

Kakashi may be seen as a pervert, and perhaps he was, but he refused to act like that in front of a woman. It was disrespectful and the only one who he could tolerate doing that would be the Number One Perverted Toad Hermit himself. And even Jiraiya had his limits on what he could do. Looking was fine, but that was _only _with Jiraiya.

Naruto had not taken notice of Kakashi's hidden expression, not that the copy nin fully expected him to anyway, so he tripped forward when he felt a hard slap hit him in the back of his head.

"What was that for?" he asked with idiotic tears at the corners of his eyes. Kakashi had often wondered how Naruto could survive a fight with _Gaara_ and not cry, but get hit upside his head by his teacher and have tears form immediately.

Sakura stopped and turned around to stare at the two. It wasn't a rare sight to see, but it was always amusing to find out why Kakashi had hit Naruto.

"You know why," Kakashi answered vaguely the blond. Naruto looked annoyed as Kakashi started walking again. But he was grateful that his old mentor was still protecting him by not blurting out what he had been doing in front of Sakura. That was sure to get him a chakra filled hook to his right cheek.

"Yeah but you didn't have to hit me so hard," he whined. Naruto rubbed his head and everyone continued walking. It was quiet and nice; there wasn't any unwanted tension between the three, even after what had happened.

Even after they had killed all those people, everything still seemed normal this morning. Sakura looked down, being reminded of last night was depressing for her. It was like a bad dream that haunted you constantly in the back of your mind, just waiting to come to the fore front and break you down as it had done before.

Sakura saw those blurred flashbacks again. She resisted her body's natural tremble and instead grabbed the sleeve of Kakashi's shirt. Walking in front of everyone else no one noticed her tight grip on the fabric, and she was grateful for it because the shirt calmed her, and she knew why.

Her heart begged to believe in Kakashi again. She had always trusted him, and stopping hurt her in a way she couldn't explain. It was like losing faith in Naruto or Ino. They were her best friends and she would do anything for them, even if they could be annoying at times. But Kakashi managed to fit into her group of important people without even trying. He wasn't a close friend or even a distant relative, but he was still family.

Losing him was not an option. It was not something she could handle and she knew that. His shirt felt like a link that held her to him, as simple minded as it sounds. It wasn't alive and it wasn't an evil object or a weapon or a scroll or anything that had to do with fighting. It was a shirt, plain and unique at the same time. It was just like all the other shirts in his closet, or anyone else's for the matter, but it was different. It was special.

It had survived the slaughtering of man with her in a night of trauma, but it had belonged to another. It had belonged to Kakashi, the man who led them through that nightmare. She didn't want to give the shirt back to him; it symbolized her waking into the dark world of the elite shinobi. But she didn't know how to explain that to him without making it sound weird.

So for now she would just enjoy the comfort that it brought her, covered in blood and sweat and mud and all. It belonged to her…in a way.

Kakashi and Sakura both let out a sigh of relief when the sight of their village gates appeared in front of them. Naruto jumped with excitement. It seemed he was happy to be home as well.

Sakura let her head fall. Now was the best time to return it, before everyone in the village saw her with her teacher's shirt wrapped around her hips. But she untied the knot of the sleeves slowly and with a measure of reluctance. She had resisted putting it on and now she found herself not wanting to take it off.

Kakashi stared at her. She had finally loosened the knot enough to slip it from her body. Her small hands held it close for a moment before holding it out to him. All he did was smile at her with his one visible eye. It was happy and cheerful, but she could also see pride building in the depths of his ink black eye.

"You keep it," he offered, "as a souvenir of your first mission."

Her face lit up in surprise, she had not been expecting him to give it to her. She smiled, both in happiness and gratefulness. At least now she wouldn't have to ask him.

"Besides," he started, "I'd hate to have to wash it."

She looked at him in question, and then her gaze slid back to the shirt still in her hands. It was stained in blood, but that's what made it a souvenir right? She giggled with joy, Kakashi lame attempts at a joke always made him look like an idiot and they always ended up laughing anyway.

"Thank you," she said sincerely. "Weird gift, but I like it."

"Well that's good," he chuckled.

She folded the large shirt in her arms; it made it a little less obvious that it was Kakashi's. But the fact that her sensei wasn't wearing a shirt might turn a few heads toward the fabric in her arms anyway. Her inner voice screamed that it didn't matter. She didn't care. That shirt belonged to her and that was that. Let those old wrinkled women think what they want to.

The massive gates neared them and she could make out Izumo and Kotetsu waiting on the other side. They were always at the gate or running errands for Tsunade. She had gotten to know them quite well because she was often helping them with those errands.

"Welcome back," Kotetsu greeted. He seemed to be in a particularly good mood today. "What happened to your shirt Captain?"

Most of the people who hung around Anbu, and those in it, frequently referred to Kakashi as Captain. Sakura figured that it was just because he had served in the organization for over a decade, and had earned quite a measure of respect while there.

Kakashi scratched the back of his head calmly. "It got ripped up pretty badly in the fight so I threw it away."

Sakura held back a sigh of relief, it looked like Naruto wasn't the only one Kakashi had decided to protect that morning. But he had two lies in that sentence. One, he hadn't gotten a single tear in his shirt. And two, he hadn't thrown it away. He had given it to her. But did it seem like the same thing to him?

Izumo laughed. "That's just like you."

"Hey do you know if the hot springs are cleared?" Kakashi asked in interest. Maybe, if he was lucky, he could have that three hour bath in the large steaming spring.

"Last time I checked it was empty," Kotetsu answered for him. "I still don't get why you care though. It's not like you're shy."

"I just prefer bathing alone." Kakashi smiled.

Sakura cocked her head to one side. She had just discovered one more clue that made up Kakashi. No wonder the three of them had only gotten him to a hot spring once.

Kakashi turned back around to face his former students, he waved two fingers at them accompanied with a hurried, "See ya." A small puff of smoke singled his disappearance.

Sakura turned back to her friends in Tsunade's manual labor and asked, "Is he always like that when he gets back from a mission?"

The shrugged simultaneously and both answered, "Yeah."

She glanced over her shoulder to see Naruto running off yelling a friendly good bye to her. She sighed. "That's weird."

"What, Naruto's scream or Kakashi's habit?" Kotetsu asked in sarcasm.

"Both."

They laughed. It was good to be back. She didn't feel as bad as she had the night before, now she was able to see what she had been killing to protect. Konoha was her everything. It was her home, it was her pride, it was her life.

Kakashi appeared in his plain comforting living room. It was bland and didn't have much of a design, it was simple. But that was ok with him, he was a simple man. It was warm but better than the heat of the forest. Slipping off his bloodied vest he dropped it on his floor while walking to his bedroom door. He opened it and went inside, noticing the closed window curtains.

He pulled his undershirt up, sliding it gracefully over his head and proceeded to toss it out the open door to fall onto his vest, creating a pile.

He sighed with relief. The fresh air meeting his uncovered skin helped to relax and sooth him, even if it was only a little. He turned his wooden desk chair around and sat in it comfortably; crossing one leg over the other he took off his shoe. He unwrapped his leg bindings slowly; he wasn't in a rush for anything right now. Switching his legs he repeated the process.

Once done he leaned back in his chair and looked up at the ceiling. It was the same thing every time he came back from a slaughtering mission. He would be caked in dirt and blood and the dried sweat added on top of that would no doubt only make him smell worse. He looked over to the calendar hung up near his headboard and noticed that it was getting awfully close to another birthday. He'd be thirty-one soon.

If that wasn't depressing then he didn't know what was.

He had always been the young protégé, the boy genius. Now he was a man, and an aging one at that. When he hit thirty he thought that it would end there. He'd probably die soon anyway. He had far outlived his time. Or he'd get old and lose his skill, his body would become slow and pain him, he'd start to forget things, and those flaws were what were cause him to die.

It often felt like he was older than he actually was. Like he had lived longer than Tsunade, but his body was still the age of Naruto. It never made sense to him. He had asked Tsunade to explain it; he had asked nurses to explain, hell he'd even asked Jiraiya once. The only answer he ever got was that his body was younger than he was, like it was aging slower. It just made him look like an idiot because his mind couldn't comprehend it.

He figured that it didn't matter anyway. As long as he's doing his job and doing it well then no one is going to complain. It would be annoying if they did. Wait what does that have to do with body aging, mind-not-understanding headaches?

He shook his head, getting up from the chair and unbuttoning his pants. They slid down his legs with a half assed energized push. He couldn't care less how they got off, as long as they were off.

Standing in nothing but his dark red boxers he began to wonder why he had picked red. He usually wore blue or black or sometimes a forest green. Why red? Red was a color that stood out, that caught attention, and that most people were drawn to look at because of the depth of the shades. If the color was black then there wasn't anything to look at.

He walked into the bathroom and proceeded in his home returning routine. He'd always change clothes, shave, wash out his hair, brush his teeth, and then wait until 11:30 to go to the hot springs and soak until he felt like passing out from the heat. It helped him forget what was unforgettable, or helped him take his mind off his killings.

He had once been affected by murdering men so ruthlessly in much similarity as Naruto and Sakura. He had devised this routine, this order, to help him get it out of his system. If you let something build up inside you then it has a greater chance of causing harm when it comes out. He decided to cancel that demon before it could be created.

By setting up this act he could effectively do just that.

He looked up into the mirror listening to the water still running, a steady rhythm to his hears full of screams, and studied the droopiness of his eyes. He rarely did this because he had lost interest long ago, but on the undecided occasions where he did, he always came to the conclusion that he liked it. If his eyes were to stay completely open then. . . well he just didn't want it to. He had often been told that they were open more and held an sharpness to them when he fought. But other than that he looked lazy and tired.

He didn't mind one bit. It looked better on his face when they were droopy. He had always laughed at that fact because most people didn't see his face, so they didn't know.

There was a lot about him people didn't know, and he preferred it that way.

It was easier.

Sakura let herself fall unceremoniously onto her soft mattress, the pale pink sheets bouncing with her. After a quick hot shower she felt refreshed but tired. Even though she had slept soundly she still only had four hours of sleep. They had gone to bed unreasonably late last night. But that was understandable, after what they had to do of course.

She breathed deeply, releasing the burden of her memories with the hot breath. It was relaxing and she was excited to be home. They had been gone for several days, hunting and planning before assassinating.

Maybe that was the worst part, the planning. She had sat with her team and thought up the best way to quickly kill over a hundred men.

It hurt badly, the guilt she had felt sitting there doing that; the unbearable weight that had pushed her down and forced tears to her eyes a few hours afterwards during that night. It was unforgivable what she had done, but she knew that the people who trained her to do it had experienced it far too many times to care. Or at least that's what she thought.

She sat up and looked around her room. The window was open and the smell of nature and dust filled her nostrils. As pleasant as it was she had plans that afternoon that she had to prepare for. It was her and Ino's get together after missions. Tenten would come if she could, but Sakura figured that she might be busy with a date.

Neji had asked her out over a month ago, and Tenten readily agreed. They made a cute couple and everyone was so happy to see that they had finally gotten together. Most of Tenten's close friends had always talked about her affections for the pearly-eyed Hyuga, and had encouraged her to give the guy a hint or something! In the end Tenten had agreed to go on a date with some dark haired chunin who had been taken with her natural feel and deep brown eyes.

Neji hadn't been too happy about it.

That was Sakura's first clue that Neji had feelings for Tenten, but it became quite obvious when Neji almost beat the hell out of the boy for trying to kiss her after the date. He had been causally walking by and just happened to see. They were all very grateful for it, and a week later the two started going out. Neji made sure everyone knew she was his.

It was so romantic! And Sakura couldn't help but feel jealous. Her love had run off years ago. Four years ago to be exact. Sasuke had left her crying on a bench while he ran off to join a psychotic nutcase who wanted to take over his body. She had wanted him back so badly, but now she couldn't forgive him. Dreams of being the next had flown out the window after her training with Tsunade.

She wasn't weak.

She wasn't needy.

And she wasn't an idiot.

If he had wanted her then he had lost his chance. She wouldn't accept him now anyway. It had pained her to notice these changes at first, but now it only empowered her further. She wouldn't allow it. She couldn't hand her heart to him on a silver platter anymore.

She couldn't take that pain.

But she knew that all of that was untrue. She still loved him more than she should.

She jumped up off the bed and started to her closet, scenes of her last encounter with her sharingan wielding teammate running through her mind. How could he attack them? How could he attack their leader? How could he be so cold?

Kakashi hadn't been there, but Sasuke had asked about him. Sakura had always figured that her crush and her sensei were closer than she and her teacher. Kakashi had always been picky about the way he taught, and he wouldn't accept less than he expected. If he believed that you could do better, then by damn you would do better.

She shuffled through her closet, finding a red T-shirt that she had grown quite fond of. It was plain, but comfortable. She slid it over her head, pulling it down across her sports bra before allowing it to dangle at her waist. Next she walked over to her large wooden dresser. Splattered across it were pictures and cards, money and books, pencils and pens, along with jewelry that she rarely wore.

Opening the second drawer she found what she was looking for on top, a pair of black shorts. It was her regular outfit when she wasn't working at the hospital or going on a mission. She still wore her weapon pouch and kunai holster but that because she was so used to them. And what would it hurt, being prepared for another attack on Konoha?

Strolling down the dusty streets of Konoha Sakura's mind was set in reverse. She started thinking about everything that had happened in such a difference light. It wasn't as painful as it had been, but it still hurt. Was this how Kakashi felt? And Naruto…

She was almost obsessed with finding out if he was alright. Naruto was so pure and good natured. He enjoyed life so much. . .would he be able to survive taking it away from another? She shut her eyes to the thought. If Naruto wanted to be Hokage then he would have to suck it up because those missions are the ones that the Hokage assigns. Maybe they aren't the ones who carry it out but they share just as much fault.

She stopped and no one noticed. People just walked around her, like everything she had gone through didn't exist. If she hadn't did what she had, if she hadn't killed, then her mission would have had a much larger impact on these people. They would have been tormented and hurt; they might have had to endure a war. And although Sakura didn't know the men and women and children walking around her she knew that she wanted to protect them, even if she had to sacrifice her humanity to do so.

That's what Kakashi felt, and she knew this was the truth.

Now to go check on Naruto, and then she'd have to meet Ino at the training grounds, stupid Pig.

Sakura found herself wishing she had worn something with pockets more than she had ever wished for such a thing in her life. Naruto was depressed. Naruto was _never _depressed. It was sad and it tormented her heart every second of every minute since she saw him. Even the ramen had done little to help, despite his happy goodbye.

In fact it had been at Ichiraku's that she had found him, his food half eaten and his head cast downwards. She had lunch with him and talked for a while but none of it helped. It didn't change anything. At this point she was beginning to believe that very few people would be able to change the intensity of his suffering in even the slightest way.

Perhaps Jiraiya could have cheered him up with ease, but the sage remained dead, his grave forever lost to an outside world that they had never found.

Maybe Tsunade could help. She probably couldn't have done much even if she had been sober. Naruto hardly listened to her anyway.

If they were lucky then Kakashi could help. Sakura doubted that he could do much more than he had already done. Maybe a group gathering of the Konoha 11 would work.

She was tearing herself up over this and she knew it. She had better start thinking straight because Ino was more than likely going to try and pull details of the mission from her. This mission was classified, but the blond didn't care, she never cared.

Speaking of which, Ino was waiting.

Ino was rightfully standing on the thin strip that barely passed as a dirt road on the way to her and Sakura's best friend's hideout. A field of flowers really, that's all it was. It was no hideout, anyone could come by if they wanted, with or without the girls' consent. That was something that bothered Ino to no end.

Sakura passed by their first meeting choice, a large tree with roots that stuck up out of the ground which made perfect makeshift seats. From that she could guess that Ino had chosen their second choice, her choice really. Sakura preferred a root to sit on than dirt. She could never understand why Ino liked that place, which was why Sakura had personally carried a rock there for her to use as a seat.

Surely enough Ino was there, her long hair flowing in a waterfall of light yellow from her ponytail. Sakura would never admit it, but Ino was beautiful. She looked up when she sensed Sakura's chakra, her eyes glowing with excitment.

"So how did it go?" she greeted in her light voice.

"Not bad," Sakura answered taking a seat next to her, seeing as how Ino had decided to steal her rock.

"So it sucked?"

"Deffinately."

Ino laughed. "They always do."

"What always does?"

"Assination missions," she explained comfortably, "They always suck."

"I agree." Sakura sighed.

"So in this one...?"

It was a runoff question. A question that started with what it was about, what happened, and then trailed on to form other questions that never seemed to end.

"I can't tell you about this one."

"Aw, c'mon Sakura," Ino whined. "I've been stuck with lovestruck Shikamaru and Temari all week, give me a little something to go on here."

That caused a smile to form on Sakura's pink lips. Shikamaru and Temari had been together for months now, and from what she heard were even thinking about getting married later on. She was happy for them.

"Well I bet I can think of a few things that won't get me in trouble."

"Yay!" Ino cheered. She had never lost her enthusiasm, as much as Sakura disliked it at times. "So what was it about?"

Wasn't that question predictable?

"Building forces of runaways and get-rich-quick shinobi. Our job was to cut them down and destroy it before it had a chance to launch an attack."

"How did you even know there was going to be an attack?"

"There were spies in the group, feeding us information. So when we got there we started the fight before they had a chance to get ready. Kakashi-sensei did most of the killing. He got the leader too. Naruto and I couldn't stand it," she admitted quitely. "We were taking so many lives."

"I can understand where you're coming from." Ino put an arm over Sakura's shoulders to comfort her. "Our jobs aren't aways the easiest to do. Are you alright though? I mean, you'll get through this, right?"

That was weird. Ino never openly expressed worry like that, and she never doubted whether or not Sakura could get back on her feet. It was insulting, but also something that made her think. Did she really look that depressed when she thought about those mens' blood splattering and their flesh ripping?

"Yeah, I'll be fine."

Kakashi sat himself down into the steaming waters slowly. He sighed at the pleasure it did for his body, and the peace it gave his mind. The steam looked like a dense fog but he could tell that no one was there. Who would want a bath now anyways?

It was late, very late, and he knew that his three our soak would end up two hours short. He hadn't slept last night, which didn't help much, he was getting awfully comfortable, which only dulled his senses, and he was exhausted.

He leaned his head back on a smooth rock behind him, watching the water ripple as he moved. It was dreamlike to say the least. There wasn't any noise, and with the silence there came a tranquility that he could rarely obtain otherwise. The fog, or steam, managed to add to the surreal effect this regular moment always had on him.

He was freed of his father's suicide, he was freed of his best friends' deaths, and he was freed of his sensei's sacrifice; he was freed of his pain. Some times, like on anniversaries, he could feel that pressure in his chest build in to hard knots that had him choking if he spoke. He wouldn't allow tears to come. He _refused_ to cry. He had cried enough in his life time.

He let himself slouch against his resting position, he had actually been yelled at about slouching too much by Tsunade only a few days prior; sometime around Sakura's promotion. Ah Sakura, was she alright?

He sighed, both her and Naruto and any other halfway sane person would be calling it in for tonight after that last mission. He seriously needed to reevaluate his mental condition.

"Somethin' got your attention?" asked a deep voice next to him.

He turned and finally took notice of Asuma standing on a large rock to his left. Asuma didn't have his usual cigarette, the smoke of which always alerted Kakashi to his presence, and was dropping his towel to sink into the water a respectable distance away from Kakashi. Being close buddies was fine. But being close buddies while naked in a hot spring was a whole other matter.

"Just thinking about the newbies," Kakashi sighed. "Didn't even notice you. I guess I'm a little too trusting huh?"

"Big time." Asuma laughed. "But about Naruto and Sakura, I wouldn't worry too much. They'll get over it in time. We all did."

Kakashi rested his arm on the side of the rock, running a wet hand through his untamable locks. "Yeah but we were different."

Asuma leaned back. "How?"

"We grew up in war Asuma. They grew up in peace. It makes a different world. Ours' already had bloodshed but theirs' had never seen it."

"You're too deep man," Asuma said dunking his head under the clear hot water. He pulled back up and let his dark bluish tinted hair fall back. "Besides, you're the only one who grew up in war."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"Just that we were all still rookies by time you made it big. Going into battles like that at your age, no wonder you knew the war better than any of us."

"Tch, like that matters. War is war, no matter what part of it you take."

"You really need to chill Kakashi," Asuma said like a therapist to a patient. "Don't get too old too fast."

"I'm _not_ old."

"Whatever." Asuma leaned back again watching his friend's offended expression. Kakashi really did look younger with his mask off, far too young to already be thirty. "Hey your birthday's coming up isn't it?"

"Yup, can't wait to hit twenty-four."

Asuma laughed. "Like you even care. Age doesn't matter to you remember, Mr. I'm-a-five-years-old-ninja?"

Kakashi absently started to drum his fingers. "What are you doing here anyway?"

Asuma looked mildly surprised. "Why do you want to know?"

"Maybe because it's almost 2 o'clock in the morning?" Kakashi answered with sarcasm dripping from his voice.

"Ah, about that - well I was - I had something to tell you."

It was Kakashi's turn to look surprised.

"Well what was it?"

"Um…well…"

"Damn it, just spit it out!"

"Kurenai's pregnant."

"Pregnant?"

Asuma nodded.

"Is it yours?"

He nodded again.

"That's great! And it's about time too."

Asuma stared at his friend like he had lost his mind. "What's wrong with you? You hate kids."

"Nah, I never hated kids. Besides if you two waited any longer you might not have been able to have them."

Asuma glared at his young-looking companion. "I'm your age! So is Kurenai!"

Kakashi shrugged. "Never said I wanted kids."

Asuma cooled down a little. Kakashi never meant half of what he said. Most of it was pure nonsense when he was talking to friends, well close friends. Friends were considered acquaintances at best. And what most people considered acquaintances were just people he knew but didn't care for.

But Kakashi's work did force him to operate with tons of different people everyday so it only made sense that he didn't care for most of them. There had probably been hundreds of them anyway.

"So what are you going to name it?" Kakashi asked starting to rekindle whatever conversation they had been having.

"Don't know yet. I just found out today."

"And you decided to search me down to tell me?"

Asuma let his head fall back against the wall. "The rest of the group knows. And I like talking to you better than Genma or Gai anyway."

"The rest of the group?" Kakashi asked but it was more or less a statement. Genma, Gai, Asuma, Kurenai, Anko, Raido, and Kakashi himself had formed this group a _long_time ago. Kakashi and Asuma had always been friends, Genma just fit in. Genma and Kakashi had grown close over the years and everyone accepted Kurenai without hesitation. She was the one who kept everything together when the guys fought. Raido and Anko were younger and came a bit later. Gai was their group's freak.

"Yep."

"Well then why didn't you count Raido?"

"Raido's more of Genma's buddy than ours, you know that. And there's no way in hell I'm gonna talk to Anko. I'd rather cut out my own tongue."

"That's rather harsh."

"But so true." Asuma sat up. "So you gonna be a good uncle or what?"

"Uncle?" Kakashi almost laughed. "You've gotta be kidding."

Asuma sent Kakashi a look that meant business. "It would disappoint Kurenai if you weren't." In other words, do or die. Asuma wanted the gang to be good to his son or daughter, that went without saying, but did he have to say uncle?

"Yeah, yeah, you know I will."

"So when are you going to start settling down?"

Kakashi sat up. "I don't know, I'm not even sure if I want to. I mean I've never had a serious relationship in my life. Getting married and having kids is a little far fetched for my life style anyway."

"That 'life style' being constant life or death missions?"

"Exactly."

"Kakashi, my friend, you really are a complete idiot."

"Oh yeah?"

"_Oh_ yeah."

Kakashi crossed his arms. "Care to enlighten me then?"

"You're a fool," Asuma chuckled. "Marriage isn't as bad as you think it is. And having kids is supposed to be great so if you do go for that 'life style' then you wouldn't want to put such a risk on your life."

"Supposed to be great? Asuma if I didn't know better I'd say that you're scared of having a kid."

Asuma paled a little, in that moment he was thankful for the heavy fog.

"Hmph, so I'm right."

"Are not."

"Are too.

"Are not."

"Asuma you now it's true. That's why you couldn't talk to Genma. He'd have half the village thinking you're a coward by morning. And this is too personal for Raido. Lord knows what would happen if you'd been stupid enough to tell Kurenai."

Asuma was silent.

"You didn't tell her did you?"

He was met with silence.

"Asuma?"

"Guess I'm the idiot huh?"

"Damn straight."

"Don't rub it in."

"How'd she take it?"

"How does a pregnant woman take it when her husband tells her that he's friggin' scared of having a baby?"

"Not good huh?"

"Not at all."

Kakashi splashed his face with water. "Give her some time to cool off. She'll get over it. If my mind has learned anything about women it's that it takes both time and good-news-honesty to make them happy again."

"Says the man who's never had a girlfriend."

Kakashi's lips turned downward into a deep frown. "Just tell her you thought it over and you think you're ready now. You want the baby just as much as she does and can't wait to have it, you get the idea."

Asuma looked impressed. "You're insulted, exhausted, pissed, and bathing and you can _still_ give advice."

"Twenty years with you can do that to a person."

"Twenty-six years, Kakashi."

"I know."

Kakashi walked home around three in the morning, enjoying the cool night breeze that ruffled his still damp hair. If Tsunade even _thought _about sending someone to wake him up then he'd become ten times worse then anything Tsunade had ever seen. He was fucking tired. He had almost used up all of his chakra the night before killing all those men and he had barely gotten any sleep in the past four days.

He was going to sleep like a dead man.

Tsunade could come down herself and kick him if she wanted. He wasn't waking up. Not until he had at least seven undisturbed hours of silence in a dark room under warm blankets in a light T-shirt and his boxers.

Hell, he'd even flash her if it meant she'd leave.

He wanted to bang his head against his door for that train of thought as he opened it. He shed his clothes on his way to his room, leaving them on the floor where he dropped them as he walked. It didn't matter; he could pick them up tomorrow afternoon when he woke up.

He grabbed the white shirt sitting neatly folded on his desk and slid it over his body in a lazier than Shikamaru tug. He always left a white shirt out whenever he knew he would be tired when he came home. On the occasions where he didn't leave out the shirt he would just sleep in his boxers. It was Konoha anyway, it's not like he'd catch a cold and be forbidden from wearing his mask because of his runny nose.

He just let himself fall onto his mattress. It was large and bouncy and soft. He was out like a light three seconds later.

Kakashi slept until the sun reached the point in his windowblinds that shed the light directly onto his eyes, signaling noon.

Asuma had already gone over to Kurenai's, planning on using his best friend's advice that had saved him a broken neck dozens of times. She had started crying, but wrapped her arms around him in a warm broken embrace.

Asuma looked up to the sky, it was nearly noon. The idiot would be getting up soon.

_Damn fool gives fucking _good _advice. _

"Are you sure you want to take this one?" Tsunade questioned, only to be met with a confident nod. He could really be annoying sometimes.

"Kakashi you know what type this is," she warned with deep seriousness. "You only just got back, what's your rush?"

Kakashi put a hand on hip and sighed, "I've been back for three days. I'm getting bored."

"Hell of an explanation," she drawled out in sarcasm. Groaning she leaned back in her chair, listening for any creaks that could give her a reason to throw it at the masked man standing approximately five feet from her desk. She sighed. "Just give him the mission Shizune."

"Glad you see things my way," Kakashi cheered.

Tsunade looked at him with a frown and something between amusement and irritation in her eyes. "You really are a brat you know that?"

"Of course!"

"Just get out of my office."

Kakashi took the scroll in his right hand and tilted his head to the left. "What? No warnings or briefs? Is something wrong?"

She always told him something along the lines of 'Don't die', 'Try not to get your ass kicked', or 'Give me a real report this time.'

Tsunade rubbed her head.

"Hangover."

"Ah."

Sakura arrived a little later than usually, well actually she always had perfect timing and was never late, but her alarm clock had decided to break sometime during the night. Sakura was one of the unlucky people who always slept in as late as she could when she got the chance. Tsunade was going to kill her no doubt, but if she was lucky her mentor would be asleep right now and wouldn't notice.

Sakura pushed open the door with her back, attempting to carry five very thick books and both her and Naruto's mission report. As far as she knew Kakashi had already turned his in. She glanced at the clock hanging above the check in desk. 12:30 _p.m._

She was so dead. And she might even have to sit through a lecture about how her former sensei, Hatake Kakashi, had rubbed off his worst habit on her. It would be annoying and embarrassing. If he ever found out then he would never let her live it down. Not to mention Naruto.

"You're late," was the happy response to her inner thoughts. She looked up in dread, but only found herself thoroughly disappointed when she saw a green vest, a mask, a slanted hiate, and a head full of fluffy white hair. Or she guessed it was fluffy.

"Shut up," she grunted behind the strangely multicolored stack in her hands. "You're early, well for _you_ anyway. Did something happen?"

He could detect honest worry in her voice but chose to ignore it. Why did something horrible have to happen for him to be early?

"I wanted a mission," he answered dryly. Apparently he wasn't too happy with her assuming such drastic measures had to be taken for him to get up out of bed.

"Mission? Didn't we just get back?"

"Yes, three days ago."

Sakura sighed and began walking slowly; this short conversation was no probably about to end since it was with Kakashi, the guy who only ever talks to annoy you or scold you.

"Hey Sakura," he called lightly for her to turn back around. "You should head in from the back, that way she won't know you were late."

She looked at him almost dumbfounded. "You know how to make it seem like you weren't late?"

He shrugged. "Gotta learn a few things in your youth."

She chuckled. "Thanks Sensei."

The light tap of a pen falling on a desk broke silence in Sakura's solitary room. She rubbed her hand, trying to help ease the pain from her cramp. She had been given a ton of documents that needed to be looked through, approved, and sent to Tsunade for final signatures. It was the Hokage's way of skipping work, and it was Sakura's punishment.

Her punishment for being late.

She had snuck through the back, perfect timing, perfect stealth, perfect knowledge of what she was doing, but she had lacked one thing.

And that was originality.

Tsunade hadn't gone through her usual thirty minute lecture, but she had given Sakura something close to advice.

"_When Kakashi tries telling you how to get away with being late, _don't listen to him_. __Who did you think had to catch him when he was your age, huh?" _

Damn teacher always getting her in more trouble than he's worth. She was willing to bet that Tsunade hadn't been able to make him sit down and do paper work, especially not if he were her age.

Her age…?

What _was _Kakashi like when he was her age?

Was he the same as he is now? Was he different? Did he still read porn? Did he still say something heroic sounding before and after he fought? Was he wild? Was he uncontrollable? Or was he the guy who everybody loved and thought was so sweet?

Sakura shook her head. Kakashi being sweet is believable but the 'everybody loved' part was pushing it. Kakashi had a lot of enemies, he probably still did back then, and he wasn't exactly the easiest to get along with at times. But then once you were shaking with fury he'd shrug, say something stupid, make you _look_ stupid, and then proceed to walk off like nothing had ever happened.

Sakura flexed her hand, undoing the knots that had built up over the hours. The only people who even seemed to know Kakashi were those who he grew up with. Very close friends were the only ones he really looked normal with. Easygoing and playful even.

Sakura laid her head on her arms and shut her eyes. She tried to picture a younger Kakashi, one that was seventeen and fun. What she saw was a kid about Naruto's height with his hair down and swaying, wearing an Anbu outfit, one hand in his pocket, the other rubbing his shoulder, and his eyes looking bored.

He didn't seem all that different.

She heard herself groan and felt the rumble in her throat as it came out, loud and complaining. She was locked in this room; not sitting in here but locked in here. Tsunade meant it when she said punishment. Sakura had been left with nothing but files for nearly six hours and now that she was done all she had left was her imagination and a strengthening grudge against her former sensei.

Letting her forehead rest against the cool, hard surface of the desk she tried to picture seventeen year old Kakashi again. It wasn't very entertaining. Everything seemed just like it was now, except for the outfit and height. He did look younger but his hair made him seem just that much older.

She always felt the feeling of laughter tickle her stomach when she thought of what it must have been like growing up with silver hair that was constantly mistaken for grey. Being seventeen and being called thirty would have her ready to throw punches in a matter of seconds, and she knew that. Maybe that was how Kakashi had learned such amazing self control.

Sakura imagined him sitting on a gate, letting time fly by as he waited to be late just to spite his teammates, his left hand holding a bright orange book firmly as he right was flipping the page. This was the Kakashi she could see as her lazy future teacher.

She turned her head and tried imagining a different Kakashi. He was cold and dark with a merciless hardness set in his gaze. His eyes looked like black depths of frozen wastelands, ruthless and almost sad. His stance was upright and tight. He was tense with a look of alertness that just seemed to fit. He was strong, everything about him screamed that, and yet he looked afraid. It was like he didn't want something to happen, but Sakura couldn't figure out what. It was just a vision anyway, it wasn't real.

A smile graced her lips and she stared off into the blackness. With her eyes closed everything she could think of felt just that much more real. She sighed as another picture began to draw itself. She wasn't sure why it had begun, or what had started it, but she found that silent and lazy, and cold and dark were only two possibilities. She needed more.

He didn't have his book in this one either; probably because he wasn't old enough. He was still in an Anbu suit and he still had his slouch, but he was with Genma and Asuma. Sakura remembered seeing an old photo of Asuma that Konohamaru had shown her when she had helped him clean up his grandfather's things after he died. Asuma didn't have his beard, but he still had his cigarette. Genma just seemed younger. His hair was a little longer and a little brighter.

Kakashi was grinning; even though he had his mask on she could tell. It showed in his eyes. Genma's arm was thrown over Kakashi's shoulders and they looked like they had been tipped over, like the world had decided to play tricks on the earth they walked on.

Asuma was off laughing to the side, Kurenai was walking up in the background. Sakura tried to hear their laughs and jokes and playful jibes but couldn't break the silence that filled the room. She opened her eyes, casting away the curious break of thinking what it could've been like.

She stared at the blank wall. From what she knew about him Kakashi might have fit any one of those descriptions when he was younger. From what she didn't know about him, from what remained a mystery, he could've been all three.

He could've been cold and dark. He could've teasing and quiet. He could've been joyful and loved, right in the middle of everything. She dragged her head up from her resting position, letting it hang as she did. Lifting it up she tiredly let her eyes travel over the box holding all of her work.

She blinked at the irony of the name signed off on the bottom of one of the visible papers. Hatake Kakashi did plenty of missions so it wasn't a surprise to find his name on missions that hadn't even hit the pick up desk yet. A quick flash of Asuma and Genma and Kakashi as those young teenagers crossed quickly through her mind.

She decided that he did have a place where everything made sense. Genma and Asuma were close to Kakashi, no one had bothered to try and hide that. Kakashi was a member of that group, whether he was the leader or a follower didn't matter. He fit there and that's what made it work.

Sakura almost wanted to laugh at that too. She fit with Ino and Tenten and Hinata, and Temari when she came. They didn't have a leader. She could say with all certainty of her being that Kakashi's group didn't have a leader either. Sometimes one might have been needed, like on missions or during fights, but he could step up and take that playing field with ease.

Sakura tipped her head up a littler higher, trying to refocus her eyes to see what time it was. 7:38 _p.m._

Oh Kakashi was going to pay.

"Done yet?" asked a kind voice coming from the edge of the doorway. Sakura nearly jumped out of her skin in surprise. She hoped she hadn't been caught sleeping.

"Yes, I've been done for quite some time actually." Sakura smiled. "Do you think I could sneak out now?"

The woman's dark eyes softened ever so slightly as she walked up to pick up Sakura's box of files. "Sorry Sakura, but Tsunade-sama would like to see you. It sounded important."

Sakura nodded in defeat. "Yeah I guess you're right. I'll go see her. Thanks Shizune."

"No problem, but try not to mention too much. She's hunting down information that doesn't exist again."

"Right." Sakura stood up. Catching herself from falling by quickly grabbing the side of the desk, she stood there for a moment. Unfortunately her legs had fallen asleep sometime during her nap. She took a deep breath and pushed herself forward.

Walking down the hall she vaguely wondered what Tsunade could want to talk to her about. She had done her work dutifully and without complaint. She had sat through hours of mind blowing boredom and she had written and read over 345 files. She was tired and exhausted and didn't need to hear anymore of Tsunade's bitching.

"Tsunade-shishou," Sakura called as she opened the door. "I'm here."

Tsunade looked up, her blond hair falling back into place to perfectly frame her equal features. "Oh Sakura, it's you. I have something for you."

She tossed Sakura a green scroll. Catching it Sakura looked back up to her mentor, but Tsunade granted her permission without thought.

Sakura opened the scroll and read:

_Hatake Kakashi_

_Mission: Assassinate building rival forces_

_Completed without flaw. Naruto and Sakura showed real strength, but I'm a bit worried about them. They aren't used to killing like this Tsunade. Lay off for a while and give them some time to breathe. _

"Its way more than what he usually writes," Tsunade mumbled to herself. Despite all of Kakashi's intellect and training he refused to write more than necessary. And necessary to him meant injury, completion, and whether or not he was caught.

Sakura looked up. "So why did you want to talk to me about this?"

Tsunade's eyes lit up with a sort of dawning realization. "Oh," escaped her mouth in a hushed whisper. "That's right."

Sakura felt the need to bang her head against the wall. "So?" she pushed.

Tsunade coughed into her hand. "Well Kakashi demanded a mission, as I'm sure you know, and I was wondering if this had something to do with it."

Sakura's confused face alerted Tsunade to her dilemma.

"He usually takes four or five days off after a mission like this. Kakashi rarely says he's worried. And he _never_ tells me how I should handle my subordinates."

Sakura let out a strangled groan of frustration that sounded oddly like a whimpering dog. "What are you asking Tsunade-shishou?"

Tsunade looked down. She spread her fingers out across her desk. What was she asking? Well that was a stupid question. And after Sakura had been her student for so long. Tsunade shook her head, her silky locks swaying with the movement.

"Sorry Sakura. I always do this when something weird happens with Kakashi. Its habit, I didn't mean to drag you into it. But the reason you didn't know is because you don't regularly go on missions with Kakashi."

"Habit?" Sakura questioned like she had never heard the word. Tsunade had a ton of negative habits and a handful of positive ones that Sakura admired beyond all reasoning. But a habit about Kakashi-sensei? "What kind of habit?"

Tsunade glanced through the wide gleaming window behind her, "I just check up on him is all. Sometimes you find people who need to be looked after, and you have to make sure they're alright."

Sakura sat the scroll on Tsunade's large wooden desk, one that had survived her teacher's wrath successfully for almost three months. "To make sure he's alright?"

Tsunade lifted her head. She immediately regretted her terribly bad choice of words. "Not so much as to make sure he's alright as to whether or not he's in working condition."

Something told Sakura that her gambling alcoholic leader was cleverly sidestepping a proper explanation. Most people did that when it came to Kakashi. It was incredibly annoying but Sakura had learned a long time ago to respect Kakashi's privacy.

"Right, so you want to know if I think he's alright?"

Tsunade rested her head in palm, her elbow angled on the edge of her desk. She was worried about Kakashi, and she decided not to try and hide that. Kakashi was important to her not only because he was a valuable shinobi, but also because she had helped raise him. Watching a child grow up from the day they're born until they're present-day 30 tends to give you some sort of attachment.

"Exactly," she finally sighed. Turning her honey colored gaze to the side she frowned. "I shouldn't be asking you this. You don't even know."

If Sakura had been younger then she would have been thrown in fits of rage at that last remark. Luckily she had cooled down, especially around her teacher. But sometimes Sakura's old temper rises in moments of confusion and anger and pain. Right now her confusion was born into frustration.

"Well then why don't you tell me?" Her sharp words sliced through the air. She might have been able to admit her surprise of Tsunade's reaction had she not been tired, worn, mad, and unbelievably stubborn to reason.

"Because you're not meant to know," Tsunade said with an icy tone that sent chills up Sakura's spine. Even though Tsunade didn't yell, her words still held a venomous effect. It could have been hurt that silenced Sakura, or it could have been fear.

A few moments passed but Sakura remained quiet and pained. She spoke in a quiet whimper. "Why?"

Tsunade brought her attention back to Sakura. There had never been any anger in what she said but Sakura had never liked Tsunade yelling at her. Tsunade leaned back in her chair, something very similar to what she had done earlier today, only this time she wasn't searching for something to injure her guest with.

"What do mean, Sakura?"

Sakura's eyebrows knitted together in concentration and her frustration quickly turned to pain at not being able to understand. "Why can't I know?"

Now a situation like this rarely ever happened for Sakura. Tsunade had always been completely truthful with her; Tsunade had always been harshly blunt simply by nature. But a moment, a confrontation, where violent emotion and awkwardness slipped through did not often occur. There was never anything to hide.

"Sakura," Tsunade spoke her name softly, slowly. "You know that some information is very classified? That it shouldn't ever be discussed with ease?"

Sakura nodded reluctantly. She already knew what this meant.

"Sakura the events in Kakashi's life that make me do this _are_ that classified. It isn't something I can tell you without precaution and care. And there's no way I can tell you without someone finding out."

Sakura let that sink in. It wasn't hard to accept. Kakashi had many secrets, and this only told Sakura that some of them just weren't worth the cost of finding out.

"Of course Tsunade-shishou," Sakura agreed. "I'll be going home now."

She turned to leave, to go home and sleep off all the frustrations of the day, but she was stopped by Tsunade's voice.

"You never answered. Is he alright?"

Sakura tilted her head down slightly. "Perfectly fine."

Sakura rolled over for the umpteenth time that night. This had to be some form of torture. It just had to be. First Kakashi leaves on a mission, then Tsunade acts all weird, and then Naruto and Ino too. Sakura didn't know what to make of it and those thoughts were keeping her up.

Those same frustrations were building up all over again, boiling over, begging to reach the top. She wouldn't allow it. She never did. It had become extremely rare for her to cry and now just didn't live up to the standards required for it. Her most precious people being strange weren't going to cut it in her book.

She finally rolled onto her back, staring up at the ceiling. The darkness covered most of it, and the dim lantern light from outside forcing itself through her blinds just barely allowed her to make out the details. All the bumps and rigors across the top portion of her room reminded her of her life. Always filled with challenges, never a smooth road.

It became annoying a lot, but she couldn't break. What was going on now was like a small hill she had to hike up during her travels on her road of life.

Maybe Kakashi really was rubbing off on her.

She shut her eyes, trying to find some clouded faze or dizziness that signaled a sleepy retreat to unconsciousness. All she found was a visual picture of Team 7's group photograph. Sasuke was there, Sasuke was always there.

He was there to haunt her, to torture her. She felt a shiver run down her spine as the emotion built up, almost reaching that breaking point. She felt pathetic. After all this she still had feelings for him. She still believed he could be her knight in shining armor. She knew it was a foolish wish. She knew it wasn't something someone of her intelligence or her status should believe in, but she couldn't help it.

His dark gaze and his bluish tinted hair with his cocky smirk was still playing in her mind with him looking down at her with a love that only dreams could find.

She would never admit to this. She would never let anyone know that her feelings had only bled deeper; she honestly believed she was in love. This disgusted her to the point where she thought she would be sick, but she hung on. Her dreams were filled with gentle kisses and laughing children. Her heart was filled with undeniable devotion. But her mind was filled with a bitterness that resented everything he did.

Forcing those thoughts, those facts, into her heart was one challenge she couldn't overcome. He still had power over her. He still stole her dreams and love without any knowledge of doing so.

It was wrong on so many levels that she felt like screaming to release it all.

"Oh great," she sighed with an unladylike gruffness added to her voice. First she disturbed by her friends' actions and then she was thinking about her long lost love and how weak she was to still want him like that.

She was beginning to wish that there were medical ninjutsu that could put her to sleep for the next six hours that wouldn't cause damage to her brain. Life just sucked at times, especially when you were a certain pink haired kunoichi who was two days into her period.

Sakura was awake before the sun had a chance to rise and shed light on Konoha. It was still dark out but Sakura could tell that dawn would come soon. She sat up and rubbed her eyes. She hadn't gotten much sleep last night, but she figured a shower and a quick run could fix that.

Sakura leaned against her outside door, the lock already in place. She was freshly showered and her hair was still rather damp, only allowing the light breeze to cool her into an awakened state, dispersing her sleepy drowsiness.

She began a slow jog through the dimly lit road. She was going to the running track that had been here as long as Konoha itself. It was there for shinobi. Sometimes civilians would run too, and sometimes it was used for marathons if they were held, but it was mostly for the purpose of training. Sakura ran the track once a week. It helped her keep up a little of her former endurance. Working in a hospital she didn't get out much so she had to make up for lost time.

She was glad to know that her thoughts weren't haunted by her traitorous teammate. Sometimes she just needed a break. A break from her pain, a break from life. It never made sense, a break from life, but she accepted it in much the same fashion as a bird accepts that it flies, or that a fish that it swims, or that a wolf that it hunts. She accepted a simple sentence without conscious thought of the act, because to her it didn't matter.

It was just another was of saying that she was over worked, emotionally and physically.

The track came into sight and she changed her direction to meet that of the round route. It spanned along the walls of the village gate, trees and training fields as well as homes and shops could be seen along the sidelines. The grayish blue of the morning made those same places seem like they themselves were asleep. It was tranquilizing.

Se sped up ever so slightly, not bothering to slow down at the sharp turn where the track met the mountain in which the Hokage's faces were forever carved. She didn't stop when she sensed Rock Lee's chakra in the training field not far from her, no doubt doing something that would kill most other beings, and she didn't stop when she passed the Uchiha compound.

It was still there, standing broken and fractured, the rusted kunai still embedded in the walls. There was blood stains across such walls, cracks and gashes, testament to the brutally of the battle that had raged there.

Sakura would not acknowledge it. To do so would be to acknowledge the reasons that her beloved had run from her to the depths of many souls' hell. That darkness still gripped him, she knew, and he would never be permitted the freedom of it that everyone wished he still possessed.

She continued running, her eyes glancing over to a road that had been cut off from the village's walls. It ran straight into the gate, and Sakura held a confident feeling that it was where it ended. Out side those walls were forest and woods, a wild creation that shinobi were taught to survive in while handling a most important assignment.

She always had a fleeting spark of curiousity as to where it had once led but it was always drowned out by the morning chirping of the birds. She knew that nature was at its best in the village right at this spot, but she could only guess as to why someone would go so deep into that nature that they created a road to guide them.

With once last shy look over her shoulder she reasoned that the road was indeed very old and extremely worn. No one had used it in a very long time, and it was obvious that it would give and become unnoticeable among the children of the village. But to her, and to the other young shinobi it was something that they could all see as clearly as the knife they threw with an intent to stab their opponent. It was all to noticeable, all to obvious, all too alluring.

Sakura would willing admit to being drawn to mysteries, and this one was ranked fourth, out classed by only the things that she had been waiting years to discover. The first was obviously her sensei's face, that forbidden flesh that he never allowed them a peek at. The second was her shishou's feelings for the deceased toad sage, Jiraiya. The third was one she avoided. It was why Sasuke hadn't come back yet.

She felt as though that one should be ranked first, but she knew why. Sasuke's thirst for power had grown out of control, she wasn't blind, she could see before he had even left the village. Besides, Kakashi's face had always been a thing of huge curiosity to her. Like a Christmas present that she wanted so badly to seek an early look at, but was disappointed every time by the fact that it was being held in a different hiding place.

Sakura wanted so badly to laugh at herself. Here she was, a seventeen year old kunoichi, comparing a man's face to Christmas present.

Her peace and joy were abruptly interrupted by a masked face dropping down in front of her in a crouched position. The white and red dog shaped mask telling her that the man infront of her was Anbu, as he wore a cloak, she went rigid with worry.

His voice was deep and grave with a hint of impatience.

"Hokage-sama requests your immediate help."

Whatever it was, it wasn't good.


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: Um, sorry! I'll be trying to update faster, but with the way the site is changing...that might be a little hard. I still hope you enjoy the read though!**

**Send Me An Angel **

**Chapter 3: Moving **

Sakura raced down the streets of Konoha even faster than the Anbu Captain escorting her. Her nerves were getting fried off one by one as her heart pounded against her chest. This couldn't be happening. And if it this wasn't a prank to drive her crazy, then _how_ did it happen so fast? It was unimaginable and so chilling.

She expertly adjusted her feet to push her to the side, following that sharp turn, and the poor ant that happened to be in the wrong place at the wrong time. She was a woman on a mission. The dreadful sight she knew was coming only made things that much more real.

Someone was in trouble.

Someone was hurt, and Tsunade couldn't handle it by herself. This almost never happened, and it struck fear in her that she might not be able to help at all. That Kakashi might die. Why did he always have to get himself hurt? He was far too stubborn for his own good, and it drove her crazy with worry. He would come back half dead and losing life, but it had never been this bad. It was so frightening.

He was a tool of Konoha first and for most, a scrape or two wouldn't slow him down.

That's what he would say but a whole straight through his gut was _not _a scrape. And to make it worse this Anbu couldn't give her all the details she needed. How far was his healing process done? What organs had been destroyed? What method was Tsunade using to fix it, because she just _knew _Tsunade was fixing it?

That was the bad part about Anbu. Sure, they were powerful and elite but most of them would be at a complete loss in explaining an advanced medical technique, advance meaning those that only extremely skilled medics even know of.

The door was rather lucky it wasn't busted off its hinges when she ran through the entrance at top speed. Not many people were there, thankfully, so she grabbed the clipboard from the kind faced nurse trying to talk to her and flipped through it, reading what was necessary and important. She found the room number quickly and darted for the stairs.

She felt her anxiety rising as she watched with raw frustration the blood stains across the walls become ever more visible. It turned into a puddle in front of Tsunade's hospital office, but it stopped there, along with her heart. Sakura jerked her head back to the other side of the hall; they had used the closest operation room. Sakura could only guess that Kakashi had dragged himself to Tsunade to report the mission a success.

As soon as he was healed she was going to personally beat the living hell out of him. What nerve, doesn't he have the slightest idea that he could die? Kakashi had never cared much about whether or not he lived as long as he did what he was aiming for, but this was ridiculous.

Sakura shoved the door open, taking one last glance at the files neatly held in place by the clip before pushing herself into the room.

She saw Tsunade leaning over a bloodied body. Her breath was labored and Sakura could clearly make out the perspiration across her face. Her hands were covered in a brilliant green glow and her eyes were set in a fixed glare of determination. Sakura could make out the harsh curses being muttered under her teacher's breath. Her eyes went further down, to the unmistakable form lying on the bed.

It was Kakashi.

Kakashi's light silver hair was matted down in dark blood. He was dressed in his Anbu uniform. His sword was laying half way across the floor, but the rest of his outfit was still in perfect order, save for his vest and his shirt.

They lay ripped opened as Tsunade pushed harder in her struggle to mold his flesh back into their rightful positions. She had stopped the bleeding and was recreating the organs that had been lost, that was the most difficult thing to accomplish. The recreation of a vital organ required perfect chakra control and no distractions. Losing someone you cared about when they sat at your finger tips was one hell of a distraction.

Sakura continued to walk forward with shaky steps, finally taking notice of Shizune who was dealing with the more minor wounds. At the moment she was busy mending a broken bone in Kakashi's left leg.

"What happened?" Sakura asked, though her voice was quivering.

Tsunade's eyes snapped up for a fraction of a second before immediately rushing back down. Sakura could see the sweat coming off of her face in large drops. She could also see that Tsunade's hands looked burnt, probably from over use of chakra. It might as well have been peeling her flesh off with the intensity she was forcing.

"The mission," answered her mentor shortly. "He was attacked. Akatsuki." She must've felt that she didn't need to say any more. Sakura realized that she would have to get the details later, but right now all thoughts of beating Kakashi for this had flown out the window.

"Sakura get over here," Tsunade demanded as she visibly stumbled. "I'll try to finish what I can."

Sakura drew chakra to her hands and rushed in, trying to save the life of the man who had saved her countless times. Kakashi couldn't die, he couldn't. He was Kakashi. He was the Copy nin. He was invincible and strong, so strong, so fierce. He can't die!

Sakura increased the chakra she was using with an unconscious thrust. It wasn't going to happen like this, it wasn't going to end this way. Not now, she prayed, not now.

She saw Tsunade's body slouch more than what could be considered usual. Her master went limp and slid to the floor before she had the chance to cry out.

Shizune was there in a moment, catching the woman who had played as a mother to both of them. Her dark eyes flew up in a whirl of hurry. Everything was happening so fast.

"I'll take care of her, you keep going on him. I promise I'll be right back," Shizune said quickly as she pulled herself to her feet, supporting Tsunade's weight as well. "Don't stop," she warned running out of the room just as fast as Sakura had run in.

Sakura didn't say anything but went back to her current work. She was alone now, her and Kakashi. He was dying and she was the only thing preventing it.

The adrenaline and fear pushed her on. Her focus and strength meant nothing if she couldn't save him, the one person who still stood tall in her broken world.

She finished what she was working on quickly, rushing in to see what was next. She noticed that he had started bleeding again, without Tsunade's chakra to hold the blood in. Sakura could see, without anything there to cloud her vision, just how easily Kakashi could die.

She changed the course of her chakra rapidly, with a desperation that fueled a desire to save him even more. She took over the work Tsunade hadn't been able to complete and switched to her more formal medic ninja mode, but not still not being able to get rid of that fear that prickled down her spine.

Another medic came running in. Sakura risked a glance and saw that it was Ino, worry deep in her eyes. She must have seen Tsunade, but an open hole in Kakashi might have had some credit to take in that expression.

Her blond friend rushed over and began flexing her chakra to match Sakura's speed. There was still a lot of work to do, but hopefully between the two of them they would have enough energy to do it.

--

Sakura's gaze drifted lazily over to Ino as she watched yet another healer fall to the ground from exhaustion. How long had Tsunade gone? How long had she healed him?

Sakura dared not think of these questions because to do so would be to take a portion of her concentration away and to give way to the icy death that clutched Kakashi's soul so fiercely.

Sakura's head began to sag, her chakra waning and her legs nearly buckling. She shook her head, trying to gain back the energy she had lost, but it only made her dizzy. If she quit now Kakashi would die and then everything that they had done _would _mean nothing. It wouldn't just seem like it meant nothing, like how she had felt in that crowded street.

She began to close the gap, his skin finally stretching back together. She could faintly hear a yelling somewhere outside. It sounded an awful lot like Naruto, another teammate she had to protect with an unmatchable passion.

She dragged her hands up Kakashi's chest, though her arms felt as though they would fall off, closing the rest of his incredible wound. Her legs gave out from under her and she fell to her knees, her head still above the side of the bed and her hand still glowing as her droopy eyes examined the flesh she had just finished healing.

One week back from her first Jounin mission and her first Jounin teacher nearly gets killed on an entirely Jounin assignment. Jounin life pretty much sucked.

Her hand fell to her side satisfied with its work. There was no indication that Kakashi had ever been hurt, not even a scar. Her eyes trailed up his body to his face. It was dirty and peaceful, still covered by a thin strip of cloth that Fate had decided to call a mask.

"Bastard," she sighed more in content than in anger as her final threads of consciousness left her and she dropped down to the cool tiles of the floor.

Even after all that she still hadn't seen his face.

--

Sakura sat up with a jolt, a cold sweat running down the sides of her faces and her eyes wide in fear. She could feel her body shaking and she knew that she couldn't stop it immediately. She would have to wait for it to fade. It happened every time she had a nightmare and it never failed to shake her to her core when that nightmare involved her loved ones dying.

And this time she didn't have Kakashi's shirt to keep the bad dreams away, like she had been doing for the past few nights, to keep from hearing the screams of those men in that field as she helped slaughter them.

"Sakura are you alright?" asked a concerned voice somewhere in the room. Sakura looked up to see that she was in the hospital, in a bed with thin white sheets covering her. The voice had come from her favorite blond hyperactive Hokage-to-be.

She held her head with both hands. "Yeah, just a little shook up."

She realized he was sitting in a chair at the end of another bed. A quick flicker of her tired eyes to the top of that bed revealed its occupant to be her team leader and former teacher, Hatake Kakashi, mask still in place.

"Well that's understandable," he said with a light tone of relief. "After everything that happened it'd be weird if you weren't."

She bent her head back, trying to control the shaking that was steadily decreasing. "At least he's all right."

Naruto was silent, causing her to look back up in curiosity. His eyes were dark and worried, troubled in a way that was almost as bad as their first massacre a few days ago.

"He is all right isn't he?"

Naruto shook his head, "I don't know. I tried asking around and everybody said he was ok for now, but after Granny Tsunade woke back up she came to check on him."

"And?"

Naruto's shoulders slumped and Sakura noticed just how much her teammate had grown, his defined muscles straining under his orange jacket.

"I don't really understand it," he admitted quietly. "They said something about chakra and life force, and then something about his wound and body. I couldn't really get all of it, even if I hadn't been running in circles when they told me."

Sakura held one hand in the other, looking down at her wrist as the last of her shaking subsided. That dream had forced her to endure the possibility of losing Kakashi, and now she was faced with that possibility again.

"Something about chakra…?" slipped out of her mouth as she barely moved her lips to the words, her eyes staying focused on the lines of her hand.

He nodded, though he doubted she saw it. "Something about the sharingan too. I think they said that the sharingan was eating his chakra."

Her eyes snapped up, "But it's always eating his chakra right?"

He nodded again.

"So then why…?"

"I don't know Sakura," he admitted again. His lack of knowledge was frustrating her, she couldn't deal with this.

"Where's Tsunade-sama?"

He looked surprised. "Resting, duh. But I think she's working something out, she ran back into her office so fast I couldn't really ask her. Shizune was the one who tried explaining everything to me."

She looked back to Kakashi and took a feeling of utter relief at the steady rise and fall of his chest. He was breathing. He was hooked up to wires and cables and monitors, but he was breathing. He was alive and that's all she needed right now.

A sudden thought occurred to her.

"Naruto what time is it?"

He raised his eyebrows in question but glanced at the clock hung across the wall behind her. "Uh, 9:47, why?"

"It's still early," she noted. "Why are you here?"

She saw the dawning realization in his eyes and listened to his answer intently. "I was hunting down Granny Tsunade to see when our next mission was, but then I found out that she was completely out of it and you were healing Kakashi-sensei, who happened to be seriously hurt. I really didn't expect any of it so I guess you heard my reaction."

"Yes I did," she answered remembering that background voice just before she passed out. "I thought that was you."

He scratched the back of his head in a way that reminded her so much of the man lying in the bed next to her and in front of him. "Yeah well it's not every morning something like this happens."

"Thank goodness not," she sighed. "So when is he going to wake up?"

"No one told me. I guess he'll just come around eventually, he always does."

"Right." She laid back down letting the comfort of that fact consume her. He always came back, he always got better, and he never stayed down. That's just who he was.

"Hey Naruto?"

"Yeah?"

"Could you go get Shizune?"

If he had any surprise he didn't let it into his voice. "Sure."

And with that Sakura heard a soft click as the door shut behind him.

--

"Oh Sakura you're awake," was Shizune's greeting. She always had a was of speaking like she was talking to a queen and it was so different than anything Sakura was used to that the pink haired medic took it as a sign of unique individuality.

"Yes, could you tell me what's going on? Naruto wasn't much help." She sat up with a smile, it was always easy to talk to Shizune about business, or problems, or just girl talk.

"Er, right," Shizune sat down to gather her bearings before continuing. "Well you see we came to a minor…problem, or more like obstacle, in Kakashi-san's recuperation."

"What kind of problem?" Sakura asked with narrowed eyes.

"To be honest it's not clear if he'll even make it far enough to get to the recovery schedule."

"Why not?" Sakura was aware of the harshness of her voice but she didn't care. Kakashi was still in trouble, even after all that, and she refused to stop until he was safe.

"Sakura," Shizune spoke softly, "his sharingan is eating what little chakra he has left. At this rate he won't have enough to make it."

"So you're telling me that he doesn't have enough chakra to live and his sharingan is eating all that's still there?"

"In a way, yes."

"Then transfer him chakra!" She slammed her hands into the mattress, careful not to use any of her enhanced strength.

Shizune almost looked defeated. "That's the problem, we can't."

"Why not?!" Sakura's anger was rising as her fear gripped her heart. No chakra meant no life, no life meant death, and death meant no Kakashi. No teacher and no guidance, no idiotic excuses and super cool jutsu, she could feel the tears stinging her eyes at the thought.

Shizune's dark eyes were impossibly tender. "His chakra is what you might call…special. There's nothing we can do to recreate it perfectly, but you can trust that Tsunade-sama is working her subordinates to death to find a way."

Sakura felt her shaking slowly clawing its way back into reality. "What do you mean by special chakra?"

Shizune's gaze held her own, "White chakra Sakura, it's the Hatake bloodline, and unfortunately there aren't any other Hatake. Maybe if Sasuke was still here he could turn off the sharingan, but we shouldn't deal with 'ifs' right now. It's best to think of what's true and what's real, and not mislead ourselves with idle hopes."

Shizune's way of comfort wasn't exactly the kind that Sakura craved. At times like this very few people knew how to make her feel better. Some of them didn't really know how but could naturally do it, like Kakashi. He comforted her when Sasuke and Naruto had fought on that hospital roof all those years ago, and at that time she knew that no one else would have been able to. She craved Kakashi's hand ruffling her hair and his smile reassuring her that everything was going to be alright.

"What…How…What's the idea?" She knew Shizune would understand her way of short speak at least, if nothing else.

"Well the concept is that if we concentrate enough chakra then we'll be able to recreate something close to the Hatake chakra, but all the trials have failed. It turns out that it takes more than intellect to make something that comes from something so…different."

"Did you just call him a _'something'_?"

Even Naruto was surprised by the pure growl that was her voice. She didn't like yelling at Shizune, but growling felt even worse right now. Even so, she would stop at no lengths to protect him, be his name or his life.

"Of course not Sakura, I was talking about his chakra source. It uses something in his blood, which is extremely rare," Shizune hurried to explain. "It's like blood chakra and I'm afraid we don't have the genes that fit."

Sakura looked at Shizune like she was an idiot.

"Then use his blood to help make extra chakra."

Shizune sigh as she stood up, straightening her clothes. "Sakura you know we can't do that. He's already lost too much blood. And even if we did, we would have no idea how to make it."

Sakura watched her back as Shizune walked to the door, opening it in a quick motion before turning back around with a worried yet somehow frustrated look. "If it makes you feel any better, Lady Tsunade has already sent out Anbu troops to get Asuma and Genma. If anyone knows how to fix this then I bet it's them."

For the second time since she woke up Sakura heard the click of the door shutting as someone left, and her shaking returned at the end of the sound. She brought her knees up and buried her head in them as a sob racked her body. She felt so weak, so vulnerable.

She was going to lose him. That feeling had already settled in her gut and only him waking and telling her that he was ok, he was going to live, would calm that storm that was pushing over the edge at this moment.

Naruto came to sit on the side of her bed, wrapping his arms around her. She knew his eyes were on Kakashi, she knew he was holding back his own pain so he could be there for her in her misery, but she forced silence of herself even as the tears continued falling. She would not cry out and she would not scream. She would pray, and at least try to do something that made this a little easier for Naruto, no matter how small that act may be.

"Sakura," Naruto's voice was barely a whisper, "he's gonna be all right. We know that. He won't die."

She shook her head, no reasoning of why her body chose that motion, to give some sort of reaction. He was forcibly loosening his muscles, though it was clear his body wanted to be tense in his always futile attempt to retrain his emotions.

A smile graced his lips, "He's too stubborn to die, remember?"

She turned her head towards the immobile figure on the bed next to them, to the man who was causing them this pain, and nodded slowly, pushing down the knot in her throat to steady her voice. "Yeah you're right," she answered though her words were shaky and weak.

"Now get some sleep," he concluded releasing her. "You need it. I'll wake you up as soon as they get here."

'They' meant Asuma and Genma, and that just reinforced the honest desperation that her village's leader was taking to save Kakashi. It wasn't often that Tsunade was met with a dead end, and it was even less often that she called on a person's old friends to come help out when they hardly knew anything about medical treatment.

"I won't be able to sleep Naruto, not now."

"Please try."

She looked back up to him with glistening eyes, the green beauty of them magnified by the shine, and smiled slightly with a sadness that shone through. "I'll stay up until they get here. I can't sleep until I know he's ok."

Naruto leaned back, still sitting on the side of the bed, "Alright then, at least lay down."

She sighed but complied as he stood up and walked silently back to the chair he had been sitting in not too long ago.

She felt exhausted. She must have put more into healing Kakashi than she had originally thought, the fatigue was still there. She pulled the sheets around her, wishing that they were Kakashi's shirt, and closed her eyes.

--

The rush of voices and loud running woke her and her eyes snapped open to see Naruto jumping out of his seat in natural response as two Jounin, Shizune and Tsunade filed into the room with a haste that hadn't yet registered in Sakura's foggy mind.

Things began to fall into place as she sat up and noticed that the two Jounin were Genma and Asuma. They had finally arrived, but the expressions on their faces frightened her. The worry and doubt they felt was clearly written, and it froze her in place.

"What's going on?" she choked out.

Quick glances were given to her but no one answered, instead continuing what they had been doing before.

"You damn idiot," Genma cursed, staring at Kakashi with the worried look of a brother or best friend. "What did you do this time?"

"Akatsuki attacked him," she heard Tsunade explain, obviously rested and using more words than she had when Sakura had first arrived. "They didn't kill him, but they came close."

Asuma looked like he did before he went into a fight, fierce and ready, a far cry from his usual stance. He wasn't slouching and he wasn't smoking, things seemed so odd. "What do you need?" he asked. Apparently they hadn't gone over much before rushing in here.

"Chakra," Tsunade answered. "That Hatake chakra is causing some trouble. Do either of you know any way to transfer any?"

Genma shook his head, "It has to already be created."

"We know that," Tsunade glared, "that's the problem."

Sakura felt her chest tighten and suddenly it was hard to breathe. She knew that was a big reason as to why Kakashi was still in danger, but she didn't want to hear it again. With everything going downhill Sakura could barely think. Kakashi was supposed to think for her anyway, but unfortunately in was lying in a bed only breaths away from death right about now.

Asuma's eyes brightened, "What about a simple transfer?"

"What do you mean?" Tsunade demanded but Sakura could hear the hope in her voice.

"Remember when Kakashi transferred for us a few weeks ago?" he asked turning to Genma. "If there's any left in our system then his body will absorb that, even if it's impure."

Sakura felt some of her panic ebb away so it wasn't quite as sharp, but it still consumed her. How could anyone expect her to be able to lose another teammate? And Kakashi was supposed to be their protector, damn it, he shouldn't be this hurt in the first place.

"You're right," Tsunade said stunned. "Don't waste any time, if there's even the slightest chance then we have to take it now. He's not going to make it if we wait any longer."

"Right," they chorused circling his body, Genma on his left and Asuma on his right.

The chakra that glowed at their hands was blue, but a lighter shade of blue than Sakura normally saw when testing shinobi patients. It poured into Kakashi's body as they pressed their hands to his chest, pushing the energy into his chakra network.

Kakashi stirred and shifted beneath them, his face contorted like he was in pain. He grunted and Sakura's hand came to ball up at her chest, trying to calm her racing heart. She sat up.

"Keep going," Tsunade urged. She was watching the monitors and seemed pleased, but the relief was still held down by the pressure of possible failure. "It's working."

The glowing lessened as both men lost power. Most of that power was being wasted as only a small part was the white energy that his body accepted.

He gasped and arched, he was in pain, agony.

"Hold on buddy," Asuma whispered. "Almost there."

Kakashi's movements became tamer but didn't stop completely. His expression was still the same as before and Sakura looked on with a knot in her throat and hope in her heart.

Everything seemed to stop. Kakashi fell back to the bed, breathing hard and Asuma and Genma stumbled back, their hands limp at their sides like it would take far too much energy to lift them. Tsunade remained at the monitors but didn't move. Shizune and the Jounin didn't move as they awaited the results, as did Sakura and Naruto.

Tsunade released a breath that seemed to carry all the tension in her with it. "He's gonna be okay," she finally said in a light but quiet tone.

The room relaxed and Naruto cheered. Sakura sighed in relief, a gentle smile and teary eyes proving her joy. She jumped out of bed and stood beside his, studying him. His breathing had returned to normal and his face has smoothed out.

"You're okay," she breathed with emotion filling her every word. The pain had dissolved for the time being and she fell into the moment, enjoying the relief and joy that filled her so greatly.

His eyebrows twitched slightly and his eyes fluttered open slowly, both sharingan and other. She stared into them as they crossed the room, thoroughly appreciating the fact that they _were_ open. The crimson eye had never looked so beautiful.

"Hey," he strained, his voice was ruff and groggy. He looked tired, worn out, and oddly happy. "What's…going on?"

Genma shrugged with a grin on his face, "Ah you know, the everyday thing. Just saving your ass all over again."

"That so?" He tried to sit up, but tensed and fell at a sudden pain. He tried again but Sakura gently pushed him back down.

"Rest," she commanded in the perfect fashion of a family member who just so happened to be a nurse. "You're not going anywhere for a while."

"I figured that." His voice sounded like it was returning. It was regaining that smooth but deep texture that Sakura couldn't stop thinking of only a few moments ago. How amazing it felt to know that it wasn't gone, but here with her.

Tsunade walked around to stand at the end of the bed. "You fool, why did you take them on?" She wasn't happy; she made no attempt to hide that. She wanted answers as to why one of her best ninja just barely escaped death because of a fight that shouldn't have happened.

"I didn't have a choice," he explained in the calm tone that he always used, though slightly different, but Sakura couldn't figure out how. "They ambushed me on my way back to the village, I had to fight."

Tsunade bent her head back, her hand on her hip, "Who?" There was no other question to ask in her eyes.

"Kisame and Zetsu I think," he admitted. "It happened so fast. I'm only sure of Kisame, the other one I didn't see very well."

"And?"

"Well, the second one was killed but Kisame got away."

Tsunade groaned at his annoying vagueness, "I'll debrief you later."

"Alright."

Tsunade turned to face everyone else, "Good, now let's clear the room so Kakashi can get some sleep."

As the Jounin and Shizune walked out Tsunade stopped in the doorway at the sound of Kakashi's request, "Wait."

She tilted her head towards him, "What is it?"

Kakashi shut his eyes and Sakura could see dread hidden in his features as she looked at him over Tsunade's shoulder. "They're coming Tsunade. They're going to come after Naruto very soon. I don't think we can stop them right now."

Tsunade looked surprised but steadied her response, "I'll look into it."

"Thanks."

--

"Aw man, Sakura how come we had to leave too?" Naruto complained as they walked down the streets of Konoha, the people already bustling around them.

"Because Kakashi-sensei needs his rest Naruto," she reworded her former response of 'Because we can't.' "How do you think he'll be able to sleep with you in there?"

Naruto didn't let up, "But Sakura…"

"I don't want to hear it," she snapped. "Go get some breakfast and meet me at the training grounds."

Naruto nodded in defeat. He knew the plan, they had already discussed it. Sakura was practically ordering him to do exactly what she told him, no questions asked, no objects, and no complaining. It looks like he's already failed.

She was going home, to rest for a couple of hours he guessed, and he was to go eat and then train until she came to get him. She knew he would have been training anyway. That's why she set the plan the way she did. He had no idea what she was going to do, and he could say in all honesty that he didn't really care.

Watching Naruto run off in the opposite direction of where she was about to go left her with a sense of wholeness that was beginning to be stabbed at by an emptiness so vast that it threatened to take away all the relief and joy her tired soul had managed to conjure up. It seemed unfair, how life could be so cruel. With threat after threat always there to scare her away, ever since the beginning of this week, she was almost ready to give up and do the weak thing.

But she knew that neither Tsunade nor Kakashi would have any of that as she turned to tread softly back to her home. They were both fierce, strong fighters who had been born with a confidence that Sakura hadn't acquired until long after her heart had been broken. Confidence had never been side by side with her, and that fact only gave her another reason to admire her teachers, former and current alike.

She remembered the first time she got to see Kakashi fight against a Jounin opponent. It was scary and left even Sasuke trembling in terror. But she had a different reaction than her love interest had had during that battle. She had felt her first real trimmer of comfort and safety when Kakashi had stepped forward and promised to protect them. It had felt so different than anything else. Sure, her parents had told her the same thing, and Iruka-sensei too, but no one else, at that time mind you, had ever gotten up to prove it.

They had only known him for a month then, but he was more than willing, and that bond only grew over time. Like today, she would gladly put herself in danger to protect him, the same as he would do for her.

She dug out her small golden key and unlocked her door, stepping inside sluggishly. The exhaustion of overusing her chakra was still there, despite the few hours of rest she had gotten.

She shut the door behind her with the heel of her shoe, continuing to walk straight to her room and fall on her bed. She took notice of the sweet aroma that it had. It smelled like she did after she took a shower, but that should make sense. She always took a shower before going to bed.

She rolled over and pulled her fluffy pillow under her head to better her comfort. Staring at her room she realized just how much pink and red was actually present. Her curtains were a light shade of pink, matching her sheets. A pile of spare blankets that were a deep shade of blood red sat next to a valentine's day teddy bear that Naruto had given her last year. He really was sweet, no matter how much of an idiot he was.

She continued to let her eyes roam over her room, lingering on her desk. On the back of the chair sat the one of the only dark colored objects in the room; Kakashi's shirt.

She pushed herself up and grabbed it, falling back down. She held it, turning it and flipping it to observe the fabric more clearly. There were blood stains on the sleeves, as Kakashi had predicted, but the chest of the shirt was the pure color it always was. It had no stains or rips and, more than anything else to her in the room at that moment, was wonderfully perfect.

She pulled it to her chest, hugging it like she would a stuffed animal or pillow. His smell was fading, she noted with disappointment. These past few nights she had kept it close to her when she slept. To anyone else it would sound like nonsense, but somehow it chased away her nightmares; well, most of them.

Her eyelids closed and her mind fogged as sleep once again claimed victory over her consciousness. Naruto could wait until later anyway.

--

"Are you up?"

Kakashi wanted to groan. Tsunade really was as impatient as always. She had only given him a few hours to rest, and she's the one who ordered it, she should know how tired he was. "Yeah, I'm awake."

"Good," he heard her say in her 'always satisfied when she gets her way' voice. If he had been sleeping then she would have woken him up anyway, why not humor her a little?

"I still need to debrief you."

"I know." He finally opened his eyes, not bother to sit up least another wave of dizziness wash over him like before. "Let's get it over with."

"Alright then," she sat down in the chair Naruto had occupied earlier that morning, it seemed to be the only chair anyone took notice of in the room. "The mission itself doesn't matter, even if it had been the only thing that had happened, you wouldn't sit through a report on it."

She watched his eyes his masked face and droopy eyes for any sign of indifference or annoyance; anything that might help her decode him faster. She was met with only the look of acceptance to her statement, he knew it was true.

"So where were you attacked?"

"About three miles outside the gate," he answered quietly, and she was surprised at the dead tone he used. It was like this meant nothing to him. Her face straightened out as she remembered the type of person Kakashi was, completely different from almost everyone else. He shut out emotions to take in information in the most effective of ways. The pain could come later.

"Then explain," she commanded. It shouldn't take more than that to get him talking, especially not about something this important.

He shook his head, but he doubted that she knew what the jester meant. "First Kisame attacked me. He was as loud as he always is. My right arm got injured then, as I'm sure you know since you're the first one who healed me. It dragged on for a bit, the whole time he kept saying that they were going to get Naruto soon, that they were going to destroy us soon."

He smiled sheepishly, "I guess he managed to set a spark in that old temper. For a time, I stopped fighting with my head. I started fighting like he would, just brute. It wasn't a very smart move. Then the other guy, Zetsu, came around and charged too. I couldn't take both of them Tsunade, I could barely handle Kisame."

She nodded. He was as honest as he could be. Frankly she was surprised that he remembered so much, what with all the wounds he had. "So tell me how you got your gut blown out."

His voice went dead again. "That was their last attack. Kisame sent a burst of chakra out of his sword, and his idiot partner got in the way, or at least the way I saw it. I spread the chidori, and changed the direction of the attack and the size. It did more than you think."

"So putting a hole in you wasn't their goal?"

He shook his head, "No, they had been aiming for the village. It was meant to be a warning, to get us scared. They want us to know that they are coming. They want a fight, and trust me, with those guys…they'll have the time of their lives. They want to enjoy this."

His face was blank, devoid of any sign of emotion or even regret, but her face was set in a grave expression.

"So you practically killed yourself so that there wouldn't be a whole in our gate," she said in a whisper. "You really are a moron."

"What else could I have done? Let that blast hit?"

She could hear hidden venom in his voice, an anger that had long been suppressed. It rarely surfaced. She could never forget how glad she was when he had cooled down after those teenage years.

"No," his voice was a promise, "never again."

She watched him with tender eyes. She knew what he meant better than anyone else; well anyone else still alive that is. He couldn't lose someone important again; he wouldn't be able to take it.

Last week she would have laughed at his promise, with respect and confidence. She still would have laughed, and now she felt a tinge of pride building in her chest. That little masked kid that used to trick her into buying ice cream everyday had grown up. And he grew up so well, even with all the unfair hardships that life had hit him with.

"No, not ever," she agreed with a gentle smile. "You're too strong for that."

He looked back up at her, surprise written on his face. She knew for a fact that she didn't display affection very often, and she never gave compliments away for free. She could vividly remember Kakashi's grin when he had been but a gennin. A stupid little kid too cute to be a ninja, that cuteness served him well in his young life.

He leaned back and she knew that she couldn't avoid bringing this up any longer. "They weren't lying, Kakashi. Akatsuki have been repeatedly spotted closer and closer to the village."

He almost glared, she knew, but refrained from doing so. He was trying to hold on to the last pieces of self control he had left, but that was weakening. The medicine they had been giving him was for him to relax, release all his pent up stress so that his body could finish healing naturally. Unfortunately that also broke the restraints he spent so many years building.

"What are we going to do?"

She almost flinched at his growl, not a voice and not a tone, but a pure growl. She hated that thing. Sakumo had always used it when he got pissed and Kakashi always used it when he got frustrated and couldn't do anything.

"I'm working that out now Kakashi," she told him calmly. "There are a few plans going up and I'm going to pick the best one. We'll have to work with what we've got."

"And so far?" he dared to ask.

"Do you really want to know?"

He did glare, her innocent tone left something that pressed down on him. "If any of you are thinking about handing Naruto over…"he warned.

She cracked a smile, "I'd _let_ you beat the hell out of those elders if that were the case."

The relief that he felt was unparalleled. "Thanks."

"But that doesn't mean that this isn't bad too ya know."

"Are you going to tell me or not?"

"I'm debating whether I should," she admitted. "But seeing how there's no way around it, and the fact that it directly involves you, I think maybe I should."

He waited, and she was fully aware of the fact that he was holding himself back from ordering her to spit it out. That was another thing about him that she couldn't stand. He had so much authority that he was used to bossing people around, and no one ever objected unless they were a higher rank than him, and even then that was rare.

"The best option right now would be to send you back to your childhood home,*she answered cautiously. "I'm trying to get an alternative."

His glare didn't let up, but his voice lost most of its fire. "No, that's a good plan."

Now she was honestly, beyond a doubt, shocked. "But Kakashi, you hate that place. Are you sure you want to stay there?"

His eyes flickered away from her for a moment, and she could see the doubt. "Tell me how this directly involves me."

"Well," she started but didn't know how to say it. It reminded her of those times when she had to confess something to her parents, but she didn't know how to word it right. In those crucial moments, not really but still, she found that the best way was to just say it, no matter how it sounded.

"The plan is for Naruto, Sakura, and you to go and stay there for a few months under the guise that all of you went on a long term mission. It's supposed to act as a decoy so they believe all of you are running in fear to another country, which is believable, especially after what happened to you."

His voice went even more dead than before. "Do you think it will work?"

"There's a definite possibility."

"Then that's what we'll do."

And it was settled. No matter how much Kakashi was going to hate it, it was settled.

--

Sakura stirred in her sleep, twisting to block out the tapping sound disturbing her. She groaned in annoyance. Forcing her eyes open and jumping up so fast it made her dizzy. She felt stupid when she realized the sound was only someone knocking at the door.

Stretching a little on her way to the door she sighed in a bliss of unawareness. Whatever this was it should have wait until she had about five hours more sleep.

The knocking continued, but with a little more force this time.

"Yeah, yeah, I'm coming," she grumbled as she unlocked the door. Honestly, people these days had no manners. You just don't come knocking on a woman's door like that, it was rude.

"Hurry up Sakura!"

She blinked in surprise. She knew that voice. She knew that voice _very_ well.

"Naruto?" she asked in wonder as she pulled the door open. He stood there grinning down at her, his eyes sparkling. "Weren't you supposed to be training?"

"Yeah but something came up," he answered quickly. He sounded excited and eager and Sakura couldn't dare to think what had happened to make him like that. With Kakashi in the hospital and her worn to the bone she hadn't expected him to be delivering news to her on her welcome mat.

"So what's up?"

His grin seemed to grow in ways she thought impossible. "We're moving!"

"Moving?" she repeated slowly. "Naruto are you sure you didn't hit your head?"

"Yes silly, I'm sure," he answered pulling her in for a hug.

She was definitely surprised but that didn't stop the anger from pouring into her gut. "Naruto..." she warned.

His voice was suddenly serious and deep, "Sakura, we have to leave. We have to get out of the village."

"What?" What was he talking about? Leave the village? She knew that was the last thing Naruto would ever want to do. And what was with him hugging her like this? What was going on?

He sighed into her hair, holding her close. "Listen, an Anbu stopped by during my training. Turns out Tsunade's done with her report from Kakashi-sensei. We'll be leaving tomorrow."

She pulled back, her gaze intense.

"Explain that a little better. Why are we leaving?" Even as she asked the question, she knew the answer. What Kakashi had told Tsunade before they left...it was true.

His bright blue eyes dulled, "The akatsuki want me pretty badly."

"Right," she sighed pulling him by his hand to guide him into apartment. "Those gay freaks really need to get it together. What would they do with a nine tailed rodent anyway?"

Despite her light joking he was still completely serious, and she hated seeing him that way. "I don't think a fox is a rodent Sakura. And they could use it to destroy the village."

She stopped walking to sit down on the couch, dragging him with her.

"Then we'll just have to make sure they don't get it," she smiled.

He grinned back, "Duh."

She was happy he wasn't serious anymore, that mood just didn't sit well with Naruto. And she was also joyful that this whole Kakashi-near-death-experince thing had knocked him out of his depression.

"So where are we moving?" she asked playfully.

He looked confused for a moment, but then his expression changed like a light bulb had lit up. "Kakashi-sensei's going to take us tomorrow."

"But Sensei's hurt Naruto," she pointed out to him. "He's not going anywhere."

Naruto shook his head, "Didn't you listen to anything I said?"

She glared at him, "Of course, but you never said anything about Kakashi-sensei. He's not healthy right now Naruto and Tsunade-shishou would never let him-"

"It's Granny's orders," Naruto cut her off. "She wants us to leave."

She stared at him.

He chuckled, "The Anbu was Shikamaru so he explained it so I would understand."

Well that cleared up a lot. Shikamaru and Naruto were good buddies, even though Naruto was still a little on the slow side. Sakura really hadn't noticed what Naruto meant by that Anbu remark until it came back to her that Shikamaru had been accepted into the interrogation section or whatever just last month.

"So where are we going?" she tried to ask to continue the conversation, even if it was one that she didn't enjoy having.

"Um, some abandoned house outside the village. It shouldn't be too far away. If anything happens to the village then we could get back in time to at least help out a little. All I really know is that Kakashi-sensei knows the place, so it can't be too bad."

She could say with all honesty that she knew exactly why Sasuke had never stopped looking at Naruto like he was an idiot, which he was at this point. She felt her stomach twist uncomfortably as her mind ran through the possibilities of exactly what type of 'not so bad' places Kakashi could be completely at ease in.

She coughed into her hand, "Naruto you do realize that Kakashi-sensei has probably lived in a sewer for months at a time right?"

"Why would you think that?"

"Oh, I dunno, just the fact that he is personally asked for nearly everyday for every mission _because_ of his ability to stomach places like that."

He laughed again, and this time she didn't want to look at him like he was an idiot or a crazy blond, she wanted to smack in the back of his head so that his face would make a nice thudding sound when it hit her wooden floorboard.

"Oh c'mon Sakura, I bet he had fun."

"You need help," she said finally giving in to her earlier impulse to look at him like he was mental. "You need some serious help."

"Well pack up," he cheered patting her knee as he stood. "We are leaving in the morning after all."

"Right," she answered getting up after him.

He turned to face her as he walked outside the door. His eyes were so warm that Sakura just stared at him for a moment. Naruto truly had grown into a handsome young man. His hair was longer and glowed in the sun. His skin was tan and smooth, and his eyes looked like they melted into a pure blue ocean when he looked at her like that.

Then he smiled with the smallest up turn of his lips. He probably thought it would look cool, but Sakura would never admit to how right he was. If only he could see the way Hinata looks at him...

"Four-thirty," he mumbled with a light tone. "Bye Sakura."

"Like I could ever forget," she smiled, even though she knew that training with him for three hours was going to be a major pain, "Good bye Naruto."

--

After her round of training with Naruto she could say with all certainty that she was dead beat exhausted, again. But at least now she could argue her way in to not having to do that again for at least a month, or two. In any case, she was glad she had endured it.

Every time she trained with Naruto she knew for a fact that she became stronger, and that's all that mattered. Her strength. If she wasn't strong enough then those precious to her could be lost. Like earlier today, with Kakashi. Her perseverance won out, and she knew that she would never be able to express the gratitude she felt for it. Some how, some way, fate had smiled on her.

Even after deciding to break her.

She nearly jumped in to the steaming water of her bath. A woman's dream paradise. She was going to relax tonight, because all that stress she had gone through today couldn't be healthy. With low music playing as her background she sighed in satisfaction. Maybe, if the place she was going had a tub and really hot water, she could live through it.

She tilted her head back, listening to the music for one long moment of peace.

What was playing anyway?

_"-Baby I want you like the roses want the rain,  
__You know I need you like the poet needs the pain.  
__And I would give anything. My love, my life.  
__If you were in these arms tonight."_

It took her a moment to decide that it was a half way decent song, so she leaned back and waited for it to end, like she did any other song that she didn't know or didn't imediately take a liking to.

She sighed, a little annoyed with it. It sounded like something her mom would listen to, and that was insulting. She had picked up most of her parents' taste in music, but she still could understand some of her mother's enjoy from something so...rock. Not that she was classifying this as rock, she was just throwing it in to a catagory of examples. Some of them were just _screaming_ in to the microphone. She would bet that, if forced to listen to it for more than an hour at the very most, her ears would bleed. But then, some of them were lighter and more joyful. Those ones she liked.

_"We stared at the sun and we made a promise  
__A promise this world would never blind us."_

Well that was interesting? The thought was only a dull remark somewhere in the back of her mind.

_"And these were our words.  
__Our words were our songs.  
__Our songs are our prayers.  
__These prayers keep me strong a__nd I still believe.  
__If you were in these arms tonight."_

All right, so maybe this song wasn't so bad, she decided. It was enough to distract her from most of her problems, even if only for a few more minutes.

Those minutes seemed to go by so fast, and when the song was finished she found that she couldn't listen to the next one. As much as she hated it, she knew she had to get around to thinking about what was going to happen tomorrow eventually.

Ok, so they would be leaving. That sounded all right, in the long run it would probably be for the better. They were leaving so Akatsuki couldn't get to Naruto, that made a lot of sense. They were going to a place that Kakashi knew, that put her on edge. It made her anxious because, not only could Kakashi bare extremely disgusting places, but also because that would mean there was a big chance that she hadn't even known that the place existed, which sounded like a much more likely an outcome than it should.

She took a deep breath to calm herself. Tsunade would never send them to a place that was _too _bad. And if she did, Sakura gulped, then she would have to be a good girl and endure every woman's personal hell. No bathroom.

Oh boy, wouldn't that suck?

**I don't know all that much about medical stuff, or the human body at all really, so Kakashi's injury was hard for me to write about. If you do review, don't be too mean, okay? Oh, and can anyone tell me the names of Kakashi's dogs? That would be really helpful. Thank you, and as always, I hope you enjoyed it. **

**And I do Not own the song.I just like it. And for those who don't know, it's Bon Jovi's "In These Arms."**


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: I know some of you have probably read the first half or so of this chapter, because of my dumb mistake of posting chapter four instead of chapter three last week, but I want you to know that this is the edited version of it. I finally finished writing it and going back over it, so please enjoy. **

**Send Me An Angel: ****Chap 4**

With a huff she finished throwing the last of her needed clothes into her travel bag, resting innocently on her bed. No one had even bothered to tell her where the hell she was going, and she hadn't even noticed that until she started packing. She sighed as she zipped up the bag. No matter what she couldn't deny the fact that she loved everyone of them, and it hurt to think that they would keep anything from her. It was torture.

She dropped the large black bag on the floor and jumped in bed. It was going to be a long night, she knew it. Every time she was looking forward to something, no matter what it was, time always worked against her.

Sakura slipped under her soft blankets silently and pulled her pillow closer. At least Kakashi was going to be alright, that was the only good thing. He was ok and getting better and better the more time passed. She shut her eyes, comforted by the thought. Naruto was going to be alright too. They were too strong to get killed. They were too stubborn, she laughed.

Her thoughts reluctantly trailed over to Sasuke. He was just as perfect in her memories as she knew him to be. A beautiful face with a smooth voice that formed all she ever thought of him to be. As a young girl that was all of him she knew. His face. His voice. She avoided his eyes at all cost, despite what anyone said. His eyes were cold and merciless and she would have had to admit to that if she stared into them for too long.

Where was he now? Was he still with Orochimaru?

"Impossible," she mutter half consciously. Orochimaru was dead, as far as anyone knew, and he wasn't coming back. Tsunade would hunt him down personally if he were to ever show up again. He was evil and twisted and had furthered Sasuke's...sickness.

That's right, it's a sickness. He wasn't mentally incapable of understanding his position from a different human being's point of view, of a friend's point of view.

Her mind went blank and she saw darkness, letting exhaustion take over yet again.

--

Morning came faster than she thought possible. She woke from a dreamless sleep, extremely thankful for that, and quickly showered and dressed. Today they were leaving the village. They would travel somewhere they've never been before, with the exception of Kakashi, and somehow make a life there.

But it wasn't far from the village, she tried to reason. They weren't far away. At the first sign of trouble they could come back and help defend the land they knew as home. Besides, Kakashi wouldn't leave Konoha unprotected; she knew this as a fact. He was far too loyal to this village.

Shaking her head and grabbing her bag she thought to herself that he was the most loyal person she had ever met. Even Naruto didn't win Kakashi over in that category. Kakashi was loyal in his own way. A way that was true and pure and stronger than anything else she had ever known. Naruto must have gotten his sense of protective obligation from Kakashi.

She yawned, stepping out of her door and shutting it behind her. She had already locked it, but she couldn't help herself from twisting the handle just to be sure. She knew it was a stupid habit. She lived in a village full of both decent and incredibly skilled shinobi, a door lock wouldn't stop them if they wanted to break in.

She jogged most of the way there, stopping at an early fruit stand to buy an apple. Apparently skipping breakfast wasn't going to be such a good idea, she realized as she paid for the red fruit. In past missions or hikes with Kakashi they were lucky if he stopped for them to puke. In fact, one time Sakura did puke during one of their earlier hikes. She still remembered his voice commanding her to pull it together.

"Hurry up Sakura, I'm not waiting here all day. If you were on a mission right now you'd be dead."

Asking him to explain the "you'd be dead" part turned out to be a really bad idea. Kakashi wasn't one to tell them anything personal, that still held true to this day, but he had slipped them a small piece of somewhat personal information.

"Missions of assassination," he had explained, "are usually ones that involve retreat. Once you've got the target dead you have to move out, that should be obvious. If you get caught by the guards then you need to escape even faster because it would _not _be a good thing if they knew what village you came from. Vomiting during the retreat would screw up the entire effort, not to mention having to explain to the Hokage exactly why you took the mission in the first place if you couldn't hack it."

Sakura remembered the sting that lecture had had on her. Kakashi had picked her out of the group, and that was embarrassing. As if throwing up in front of Sasuke hadn't been bad enough. He also forced her to understand the dangers of high level missions in that hike. They had four and half miles left to go, and he wasn't turning back. He had made her walk a mile and run the rest. She remembered puking two more times before he finally let her go home.

Thinking back on it now, it looks like child abuse. Isn't that what her father had been screaming when he opened the door to find her cheeks green and her hand over her mouth? He had gone on a rampage after her mother had retold him what had happened. Telling Mom never had been a good idea, but Sakura had been too sick at the time to even consider it.

"Who do you think you are?" she heard her father's voice ring in her hears as she thought back to the memories she had of him shoving a finger into Kakashi's hard chest.

"She's just a little girl you bastard! You can't make her do that when she's sick! You shouldn't be able to make her do that anyway."

Kakashi's face had been blank. When he glanced down at her, trying to hide in the smallest corner of the room, he smiled warmly to comfort her. She remembered being so worried and scared. Kakashi's judgement meant everything. He was her teacher, the one who decided her life. He literally held her career in his hands.

His dark eye had then switched back to her father, but he made no move to slap away the finger that she was sure must have been bruising him by then. "Listen, Sakura chose to be a ninja. No one forced her into this. There are certain requirements of shinobi that seem harsh to civilians," he continued with a reasoning voice, "but it's all for their survival in the end."

Sakura could still still picture her father's glare perfectly.

"And these _requirements _involve my daughter puking her guts out on a street while you tell her to go faster?"

She still didn't know whether the look that Kakashi had given her father was one of impatience or anger but was enough for the male Haruno to shut up and listen.

"I don't think you understand what it is we shinobi do to protect your sweet little home here, sir. We get our guts _pulled _out by instruments that would scare you shitless," his tone had been so bitter. "We withstand interrogations that put some of us in the mental hospitals so that we don't give the enemy information about how to end your precious lives."

Sakura had never before seen Kakashi like that. He had been brutally honest before, sure, that was just his nature. But to lay down the fundamental dirtiness of shinobi life in front of, nevermind directly to, a man who's daughter has pink hair? That just seemed...cold.

"And Sakura's fine. It's just a twenty-four hour sickness."

Kakashi had pulled back then and walked toward the only exit of the room. Sakura's corner just so happened to be right next to it.

Her father seemed to have recovered from his speechlessness in time to start yelling again before Kakashi reached the exit. "What do you know about kids huh? Do you have any? Do have any idea what a parent goes through sending their child to a school that trains them to be killers?"

Kakashi had turned back around, but his mood had changed. He wasn't cold anymore, he was just straightforward. "No, I don't. I don't have any kids, and I don't think my childhood can actually _count_ as a childhood."

Somehow her father's glare had lightened a bit in surprise, "What does that mean?"

Kakashi shook his head and began walking back out while answering his question, "I've been a ninja for a very long time."

She remembered the feel of him ruffling her hair as he left; the tingle as a smile rose to her lips; the sound as her father began to boil once more at the fact that Kakashi had even touched her. Days like that she would never forget. They were the ones where she learned just who Kakashi really was.

He wasn't kind, but he wasn't mean. He did what had to be done. He told the truth like it was and didn't change the facts. He didn't soften the blow unless it absolutely had to be. Even when he was down and dying he did what he must. In that sense he earned the respect of so many people. He had so many looking up to him and so many more judging him. How did he deal with that?

Sakura took a bite of her apple, figuring the question to be a stupid one to ask. Kakashi could deal with anything. People could hate him or love him and it wouldn't make a difference in the world to him. He already had more problems than she though possible to deal with, but by the end of the day he could kick back with a book and enjoy a few hours of peace with all that work done. Not only was it done, but it was done exceptionally well.

She pushed through the doors of the Hokage Tower, but not quite as hastily as her last time. It was just about time to go, although she was rather early. So much for that "kicking back and relaxing for a few peaceful hours" that Kakashi got to take advantage of so often. Sometimes it just felt unfair.

Even so, she had a smile on her face as she adjusted her bag to better comfort herself and threw her half eaten apple into the first trash bin she could find on her way to the Hokage's office. A thought occurred to her as she continued on her way down the long hall to meet Tsunade. Kakashi had been admitted to the hospital only yesterday with an impressive injury and now he was expected to show his former students the way to a hideout outside the village while still recovering from a hole in his stomach and a major lack of chakra?

That just seemed ridiculous.

She turned the doorknob a little less lazy than she had when she walked into the building, with a slight increase in her haste, and felt the same worry that had tormented her settle back into her gut when she saw Kakashi leaning against a wall with Naruto annoying him and Tsunade at her desk.

"Are you supposed to be out of bed?" she asked quickly, walking over to Kakashi while completely ignoring Tsunade's greeting of, "About time you got here."

He smiled at her, "Of course Sakura. Who is else is going to teach you kids how to get three feet out of the village?"

Her frustrated worry didn't let up, even as Tsunade called them to order.

"Alright, that's enough. We don't have time for this right now," Tsunade said quickly, "Kakashi's fine for now Sakura, although I'm not going to release him completely just yet."

Her eyes darted over the shinobi in front of her, one slouching in what could only be described as disrespect, and one blond pouting in the most aggravating way. She sighed, "You all know that you'll be leaving very soon. Their are certain warnings and rules we need to go over before we can get to that."

"Like what?" Naruto interrupted in complete Naruto fashion.

"Like where you're going."

Sakura could have sworn she saw Kakashi flinch at that, though she couldn't be sure since she just barely caught the motion from the corner of her eye.

"Now, you'll be staying in an abandoned home about a mile or so from the gate. No one will expect anyone to go there. It hasn't been used in more than twenty years. Kakashi will tell you what rooms are open to you and what rooms shouldn't be entered," she paused to shuffle through the papers scattered across her desk. She brought up a bottle full of large white pills and tossed them to Sakura. "Those are for Kakashi," she explained. "Get him to take two every night at nine o'clock, got it?"

Sakura nodded, stuffing the bottle in to a secure pocket on the side of her bag.

"Good," Tsunade approved, "that covers quite a bit. As for the electricity, I have Kotetsu getting that turned back on at this very minute. Izumo is taking care of the water. Genma is getting your things Kakashi, and Asuma is at the house waiting."

"For what?" Kakashi demanded almost childishly.

Tsunade grinned, "To help you limp around."

"Seriously Tsunade, what's he doing?"

Her grin faded and she shook her head, "Just getting a few things ready. He's making sure everything will be in working order for when you three arrive."

Kakashi nodded in acceptance, but Sakura found all of this to be more exciting than the chore Kakashi considered it to be. She felt it would be exciting to hide for a few months, in a place she had never known existed, with two of the most important men in her life.

She couldn't help herself when she asked, "How does Kakashi-sensei know this place?"

Tsunade showed more surprise than Sakura was used to, and that put her on edge. Maybe he was tortured there, taken there during some war when he was captured. It would be believable, after learning of the fact that Kakashi's gone through a lot more in his life as a ninja than she thought possible at first, or at least possible while still being sane.

"It was his childhood home," she heard Tsunade reply quitely. "He moved into the village when he was young, so the house was just left there."

It sounded like something was being left out. Tsunade was using such a careful, yet somehow unbearably tender, voice. Sakura decided to ignore it. Kakashi hadn't shown any reaction after all.

"His childhood home?" They had peeked her curiosity.

"Yes, so he knows the place better than anyone else. Listen to him and you won't get hurt."

Ok, that sounded a little weird. "Hurt?"

Tsunade realized her mistake, "Hurt as in Kakashi's bastard pets."

"You don't have to be so mean," he muttered in his corner. Then he turned his head back to face his leader, "Is that all then?"

"Yes," Tsunade answered, "Go wait at the gate. Once Genma gets finished he'll be joining you."

"Right."

Kakashi left slowly, and Sakura noticed the obvious limp Tsunade had been talking about. She moved to go help him, but was called back.

"Sakura, stay a while. I have a few more things to discuss with you."

--

Naruto had helped Kakashi walk to the village gate. Sakura had been too absorbed in her own thoughts to notice much of anything else. Her quick review with Tsunade had her even more worried than before. She barely realized they were outside the gates when Naruto called for her to hurry up. She finally took notice of Genma staring at her with an annoyed expression.

"Where do you think we're going?" Naruto asked as Sakura joined him at his side.

"I don't know," she shrugged, obviously this conversation was irritating to her. She wanted to run over that last conversation with Tsunade a few more times. "We'll find out when we get there."

She turned her head away from him. Her eyes settled on Kakashi, being half dragged by an impatient Genma. She wondered why they were such great friends, what with the way Genma was treating her injured former sensei at the time. Her gaze remained locked on the bodies in front of her even as her mind saw Tsunade sitting calmly at her desk, giving her the personal last minute warnings.

"Sakura," she had said slowly, "there are a few details you need to know about what the medicine does to Kakashi. It breaks down most of the walls he's built up over the years, and that allows his emotions to...make their presence known."

She was being so careful about her choice of words.

"That's why I only want him to take them before he goes to bed, around nine. He needs proper sleep and a little medicine to help him finish healing. Even with all of our skill we can't completely cover a wound like that, and so his body is going to have to finish the job for us."

"I already know so why are you telling me this?"

Tsunade shook her head, "Because Kakashi's situation is a little bit different from the ones you regularly encounter in the hospital. Even for a shinobi he isn't quite normal. So take a few precautions and watch after him, especially after he takes the pill. You might lose a little sleep because of it."

Tsunade had refused to further discuss her meaning, rushing Sakura out of the office with the excuse that Genma had arrived and she was keeping everyone waiting. As frustrating as it was, she had obeyed. It never paid to go against Tsunade, not when she was serious about what she was doing.

Now she was regretting that choice. Everything Tsunade had said kept replaying itself inside her mind, making everything more confusing with each word. She said something about losing sleep, and something about Kakashi not being normal. Well isn't that obvious? Kakashi's never been normal, and Sakura would have lost sleep because of this movement of residence anyway. She never adjusted well to new environments, especially not ones where certain parts of it are cut off for unknown reasons.

It was all incredibly frustrating, and yet, she found herself happy. Now she would be able to take care of Naruto and Kakashi without needing an excuse to do so. Tsunade was right. Some people just need someone to look after them, and her boys are a prime example.

She heard Genma after maybe an hour, when the silence had finally started to gnaw at her nerves. His deep rumble of laughter lightened the mood.

"You really screwed up this time," she could hear him say, and she could only guess that he was talking to Kakashi. "Even I could kick your ass right now."

"Shut up," her sensei mumbled, apparently not liking or agreeing with the idea. "I'm not out yet."

"You never are," his laughter lowered itself to a warm smile. "These kids should have seen you before though. I bet they'd be shocked."

"Doesn't really matter, now does it?"

"I guess not," his smile turned slightly cocky, "but it still would have been fun."

"Oh, and how's that?"

She had the feeling that Kakashi was just stringing Genma along for the small talk. Perhaps they were having an inside joke of sorts, something that she and Naruto would not understand. Once again she felt left out and betrayed. How could they continue to keep things from her?

"I would pay good money to watch you and Naruto go at it at seventeen."

There was a shock among his students, and Sakura was sure he could sense that, but he laughed. "Yes, that might've been fun. But even if I were seventeen I wouldn't have anything to fight with him over."

Genma began to pout. "You came up with stuff to fight with me about."

"I was creative."

Sakura giggled. Watching Kakashi play around with old pals was turning out to be quite amusing. They had a lot of history together, and with their ninja reputation to go by she believed that they even knew what the other one would say before he said it.

"I have an idea," Genma announced, his smirk clearly showing that he had hidden knowledge unknown to the rest of them.

"I'm afraid to ask."

"You should be," Genma grinned. "It's quite a discovery."

"Uh-huh, I definately don't want to know."

Genma tilted his head to look to the side, his eyes meeting Naruto's. "How about you? Do you want to know?"

Naruto looked smug. "I'd beat him no matter what it was." It sounded like Naruto was clueless to any part of the conversation that had taken place after Genma had said that it would be fun to watch Kakashi and him fight. Poor kid.

Genma took on an expression that Sakura had seen on Kakashi and could recognize on anyone's face, with or without mask.

"You do know that you don't have to actually fight to fight right? That there are other ways to have a battle?"

"Of course," he answered, though his confidence had faded a bit. "But I could win anyway."

"That's what _I _thought," Genma laughed. Then he turned back around, without sparing either of them another glance. Giving his attention back to Kakashi he addressed him, "But this guy won hands down."

There was a moment of silence, the younger two not willing to disrupt the older ones. Genma lost his happy mood staring at Kakashi, his look turning into worry. Sakura found it easier to understand how those two were best friends now, when one wasn't in a foul mood.

"You look tired," Genma spoke evenly. "Maybe we should take a break."

"No," Kakashi shook his head, "keep going. We don't have much further to go."

A slow smile spread across Genma face, reaching ear to ear. "Maybe I should give you a piggyback ride."

"Hell no."

The laughter returned.

--

Sakura caught sight of Kakashi's head bobbing up and down a little while later. He really was tired. She began to feel a little safer around Genma. He could read Kakashi so easily. She hadn't been able to tell he was getting sleepy until now, when he was fighting to stay awake.

Genma stopped, and Kakashi would shake his head furiously.

"Keep going," he would growl over and over again. It was always accompanied with another mumble from Genma of, "Stubborn idiot."

She was beginning to worry. Kakashi was just barely released from the hospital, and really he should still be in it. Pushing himself is going to make it worse. Much worse. His body is supposed to be healing itself, but with the way he was acting she was starting to think that he would tear his body apart before even a scrape could heal. She had just opened her mouth to voice her opposition when his head steadied and he straightened.

"Asuma," he both warned and greeted. He was alerting them to their new arrival while also saying a quick hello. Sakura was suddenly reminded of Kakashi's tracking abilities and his sensitive sense of smell. Though it wasn't as strong as Kiba's, who had trained himself with the art for years, it was still impressive. She wondered if his sense was different from her Inuzuka friend's.

"Hey morons," came the reply. She wasn't sure when he had appeared standing in front of everyone, but all of a sudden he was there, staring down at not so good looking Hatake with a smile. His cigarette was just lit. "You took forever."

"We got lost on the road of life," Kakashi joked. Asuma wasn't affected like she remembered being the first time she had heard that excuse. He must be used to that one by now, she reasoned. "A long path indeed."

Asuma slung Kakashi's only spare arm over his shoulder to help Genma drag their friend the rest of the way. Or that's what she thought. He didn't continue walking though, instead he and Genma pressed a hand to Kakashi's back and shot a burst of chakra into Kakashi's body. He grunted in pain, and Sakura felt herself moving forward to stop them. She never wanted to see him squirming in pain the way he had been in that hospital bed, not ever again.

But that one shot was all they gave. After that they released him to let him stumble forward to gain his balance. She could barely make out the curses he was muttering under his breath, so filled with venom that she could feel the sharp edge in his voice.

He shut his eyes, took a deep breath and release it slowly. Afterwards he put his arms above his head and stretched, the popping of his back was so loud Sakura thought that they might have missed something in their last medical examination of him.

"Bastards," he breathed as he shoved his hands into his pockets. "You planned that."

"You can walk now," Asuma reasoned.

Genma and Asuma began to trail behind him. Genma whispered something to Asuma that sounded an awful lot like, "Watch out, he's gonna want to get us back."

She giggled to herself. They were just like kids. A bunch of boys. A group of brothers.

Not long after Asuma joined them she could tell the split in the woods was becoming more and more evident, even though it was slowly developed. She could see a gate, and the shape of a house. It looked like something she could live in comfortably, at least from a distance.

Genma started to laugh, though she had no idea as to what could have been funny. They were walking on a wide dirt road to an abandoned home in the middle of the forest with a temporarily crippled man. To make matters worse, that crippled man was their leader.

At least Asuma seemed to understand what his insane friend found humorous.

"What?" Kakashi asked out of impatience. His old buddies never did make any sense.

"Oh nothing," Genma sighed once his laughter died down. "I was just thinking of all the stuff we used to do out here. You haven't been here in years."

"So that was it," Kakashi also understood after that short explanation. Sakura found it very annoying how three old men could read each others' minds. Kakashi chuckled softly to himself. "I suppose you're right."

The house was getting closer, and Sakura could finally see how large it was. Her entire family and every last one of her friends could come and live together. All of the rooms might have been taken up by then, but she doubted she would have a problem with that.

The gate she had seen spread out to cover a good deal away from the house. She could see why Genma would have enjoyed "all the stuff they used to do out here." There was plenty of space, and young boys loved to play outside. The clearing made it so that a parent could keep an eye on the kid without much worry, and with the house this far away from the village she could understand how safe it must have been.

She noticed something that looked an awful lot like a shed 20 feet from the house. After walking a little closer she could make out the shape of two sheds. That was weird. Why would someone need two sheds?

They reached the gate, and Kakashi reluctantly opened it. He was so slow in doing so, almost like he didn't want to. That was when she heard it.

Barking.

Eight dogs came bounding down the small slope of a hill that stood in the front yard. She recognized them immediately, for they had saved her life only less than a week ago. Kakashi's ninja hounds weren't something you could forget. But they way they crowded around him to greet him made it seem like they were just a pack of dogs greeting their master.

And in a way, they were.

"I thought summons came from a different world," she said in surprise.

Kakashi looked back at her, his hands petting the tops of fur covered heads, "Usually they are, but I raised my summons. They stay here because it would quite hard to explain why eight dogs were living in my apartment."

Sakura's surprise wore off a bit. Kakashi always had reasons, things that made his actions make sense, and she should have known better than to doubt him, or his sanity. She was again surprised when a small tired looking dog came over to stare up at her. She remembered seeing him before, and remembered thinking that he was extremely cute. She was pretty sure Kakashi didn't have any female dogs among his pack.

"You're staying here, right?" he asked in a bored yet interested tone, his head cocked to the side causing the tattoo on his forehead to become slanted.

She smiled, "For a while."

Naruto was busy being Naruto, which meant getting into an argument with Kakashi's meanest mutt. With his black lips curled back over his unbelievably vicious looking teeth Sakura reasoned that Kakashi had certain dogs that should not be messed with, even though she had seen that exact same dog being scratched behind the ears by Kakashi only a few moments ago. The growl that then rose from that dog's throat was enough to make even Naruto step back.

"Take it easy," Genma ordered as he walked by to grab Kakashi's arm. "Naruto's an idiot so be too hard on him."

Genma had then proceeded to drag Kakashi away, which earn a few unashamed whimpers.

The cute dog who had spoken to her continued to follow her. She wondered what his name was.

But then again she wondered a lot of things.

Everything felt like it was going in slow motion when they reached the front steps. Kakashi began resisting Genma's tug, which only caused him to tug harder. Her tired looking canine companion suddenly looked worried. Even the ever calm, cool, and collected Asuma was looking uneasy.

She was thrown back in to the frustrating emotions she had felt in Tsunade's office the day she returned from that first mission. She had been questioned on whether or not Kakashi was ok, and then felt insulted when her teacher had muttered to herself that she shouldn't be asking Sakura, since Sakura "didn't even know." She felt left out and stupid, like there was a knowledge sitting in front of her that she longed for but couldn't reach.

Genma released Kakashi, and her former sensei took a step forward on his own. Somehow, even without her longed for knowledge, it seemed like such an accomplishment. Kakashi huffed in an almost childlike way. He turned back around.

"The right side of the house is off limits," he announced. "The left side is pretty much free to your liking. Asuma will show you the rooms picked out for you."

He didn't mention what he would be doing, but Genma followed Kakashi inside leaving the rest of them to wait for Asuma.

With a sigh the Sarutobi called for them to follow with a wave of his hand. Sakura came in with Naruto behind her. She noticed that the dogs wouldn't come inside the house, apparently they had been trained quite well.

Inside was even more beautiful than out. She took off her shoes and walked behind her superior through the house. There weren't many pictures, seeing as how it looked like many of them had been taken down. On delicately carved tables, numbering between three and six, there sat evenly placed pictures that had been turned down. Scrolls lined the walls still though. Detailed paintings covering every inch of paper that was shown.

They turned down the hallway, and she gasped. This time weapons hung close to the ceiling. Timeless tools of battle that would have Tenten sitting here bubbling with happiness for hours on end. Their shine could still be seen through the thin layer of dust that had settled over them.

"Here's your room Naruto," Asuma said opening a dark brown door to a relatively spacious room with a queen sized bed in the far right corner. A large dresser was pressed against the left side and a lamp stood on the edge. It had plenty of room for Naruto to do his workouts.

Naruto walked inside, looking around. "It's so clean," he spoke to himself.

"Yes, well, Kakashi's father liked a clean house," Asuma answered. Then he turned back to her, "Your room is right across from his. I need to make sure Kakashi and Genma are doing alright. If you need help or get lost call Pakkun. Understand?"

She nodded.

He left, walking back down the way they had come. It would take a while for her to get used to this place. It was nothing like her one bedroom apartment. She turned around to be met with another dark brown door. To her right there was a sword, cased in a black sheath that she found to be fascinating.

She pushed the door open. It wasn't anything like Naruto's room. The bed was instead covered in red blankets. The pillows looked extremely soft and comfortable and what every woman wants. She saw that there was another large dresser, much like Naruto's, along the side of a white painted wall. Closer to the door sat a desk with a rolling chair neatly tucked beside it. More scrolls lined the walls, landscapes painted in bright greens and blues.

She was surprised to see another door inside her room and quickly set her bag down on the desk to go investigate. Opening it wasn't a challenge, despite the fact that Tsunade had said the house had been abandoned over twenty years ago. It actually swung open smoothly, and she found a bathroom waiting for her on the other side.

She could have squealed with joy.

--

Sakura laid down on her new bed. She had just finished putting her clothes in the dresser and plundering around the bathroom. She sighed in content. Perhaps living here for a few months wouldn't be so bad.

Who was she kidding? She was going to enjoy every second of it.

The too comfortable bed. The annoying teammates. The job of forcibly medicating her former sensei. All of it.

She shut her eyes, enjoying the relaxation that washed over her. After going through what she had over the past few days, her nerves had had it. Murdering all of those men had been painful, but facing down the possibility of Kakashi's death had been torture. How was someone supposed to deal with that? How was anyone supposed to be all right with losing someone so precious to them?

She thought it was weird, how she felt about Kakashi. She truely cared about him. He was once her teacher, her leader, her friend, her guidenance, her pride, and she loved him. It may not be a romantic love, or one for that of a brother or father, but she still loved him. It confused her.

She found herself fighting against the silence. When there was nothing to distract her, when there were no more important matters to be attended to, her mind could wander back to Sasuke, back to her personal hell.

He had left her and everything else. He had thrown his life away, his very soul, for a chance to kill a man who he had once loved. It was a seriously screwed up situation to even watch unfold, she couldn't imagine what it would be like to live through it.

Running away couldn't be an option. Even if he had, which she knew he wouldn't, he would always be burdened with the pain of slaughtering that his brother had committed. She felt so sorry for him, like a part of his pain became her own. He was one of her closest friends, even at this distance, and that entitled her to sympathy. Even so, it hurt to think about him.

She sat up in a huff. No matter how hard she tried, no matter how strongly she fought against it, she would always give in to her desire to picture his face. To see his perfect eyes just _looking_ at her without malice behind them would be a blessing.

"Sakura!" she heard Naruto call.

She was already up so she walked across the hallway to his room, where she saw that he had left the door open.

"Naruto?" she asked, looking around. "What on earth happened in here?"

To her surprise she saw that the room had almost turned itself upside down. The blankets and pillows lay scattered across the floor, his clothes a in a heaping pile set a corner next to the dresser. The sheets from the bed were halfway pulled off and even the small lamp was thrown off to the side.

Naruto himself was sitting cross legged in the middle of the floor. The clothes he was wearing looked like he had been thrown into a crowd where everyone had been grabbing at him.

"Look at this," he said grinning. In his hands was a picture frame, one that was a lot like the ones she had seen on the tables throughout the house on their way to these rooms. But it was the picture in the frame that he wanted her to see.

"Oh," was her surprised answer as she scanned over the beautiful woman behind the glass. Her silk black hair was wind blown and her eyes were shining. Her bright purple irises could have been glowing with happiness. Her lips locked in a smile. "She's gorgeous," Sakura breathed.

"I found it in the desk," he explained. "I was looking for...um, well, I was wondering if I could find any of the toys Kakashi-sensei played with when he was little."

Sakura could hear his voice laced with embarrassment, but her eyes remain on the angel in the picture frame. Who _was_ that?

She took the picture from Naruto's hands, holding it in front of her. Could someone so beautiful had really existed? It seemed impossible. She was prettier than Hinata, and yet her features had an even more refined charm than Tsunade. It was unbelievable.

"Sakura?" Naruto asked, suddenly worried. "Are you ok?"

"I'm fine," she replied quietly. "Just curious."

The shock and wonder did not fade, as she had expected them to. She knew that she could stare at the woman for hours and still be enchanted by the pure elegance of the curves of her face and the shape of her eyes. Sakura could only guess how attractive this girl must have been.

She reluctantly tore her gaze away from those exquisite eyes and back to the deep blue ones staring at her in waiting. She smiled, "Let's look around, ok?"

He grinned back, "All right!"

--

After finding the dining room, kitchen, and a way to the backyard, Sakura and Naruto began to walk aimlessly through the house. She was still surprised by how beautiful it all was. Part of it put her in a state of awe and the other part irritated her. If Kakashi had this place then why did he always leave the bill with someone else?

"Oh get over it," she heard someone say; it sounded like Genma. It seemed to come from one of the rooms on this hallway, maybe if she could get Naruto to shut up she could hear what they were talking about.

"Get over what? I'm not the one complaining." That was definitely Asuma.

"I know, it's Hatake."

"You think we should have left him in there alone?"

"What's the worst he can do?"

She heard the metallic click of Asuma's lighter. "Probably break out."

Genma's light laughter floated through to where Sakura was standing. She put her hand on Naruto's mouth, to make sure he would be quiet, and pointed to the door the sound had come from. They pressed there ears against the hard wood.

"Well I guess so," Genma's smile could still be heard in his voice, "but he hasn't done that in a long time. And besides, I heard that he agreed to this. There's no reason why he would want to run off."

Asuma sighed. "He couldn't limp his way out of here anyway."

It sounded like the conversation was coming to a close, so Sakura grabbed Naruto's arm and yanked him behind her. They had to get away before they were caught, otherwise Kakashi may become paranoid and that wouldn't be good for him in his condition.

Her irrational worrying was probably going to be more annoying than helpful, but she couldn't suppress the deep breath of fresh air and the sigh of relief as Naruto finished shutting the door behind them. Somehow, no matter what, listening in on something that you weren't supposed to always managed to excite her. It was probably because she had been Kakashi and Tsunade's student. They demanded perfection, and they could _always_ catch you doing something wrong.

"What do you think that was about?" Naruto asked as he walked a little further in to the back yard. There was a huge tree casting dark shadows across the earth that looked oddly comforting. It was twisted strangely, the branches thick and low. It would be the perfect place for kids to climb, Shikamaru take a nap, or Kakashi spend the day reading his books.

"I don't know," she answered quietly. "I don't think Kakashi-sensei likes this place."

There was no real reason why he should or he shouldn't, at least to her knowledge. Then again, with all the secrecy going on around Kakashi she doubted that she would ever be able to find out if he did. If she were to ask him...well, she knew she wouldn't get a real answer. It wouldn't be the truth.

Even though she trusted Kakashi with her life, and so much more, sometimes she knew when she shouldn't expect him to be the great, honorable, truthful man everyone knew he could be. Sometimes she knew when it wasn't any of her business.

"Why? Didn't he grow up here?"

She looked up at the sky, taking a moment to think. "Maybe that's why. Maybe he's the type of guy to leave things behind him."

Naruto looked confused, and she couldn't blame him. She was barely understanding this herself.

She smiled, "You think Kakashi-sensei could leave this if he was the sort to throw everything away?"

Perhaps Naruto didn't understand her, or perhaps he knew her meaning all too well.

His eyes became distant and he shook his head. He answered her without looking at her, like she had done him. "I think he would hold on to it. All of it."

And, to make it worse, she agreed with him.

--

They sat outside for almost half an hour before Asuma came to the back door. He found them staring off in to space, each lost in deep thought. He coughed lightly to get their attention. "Time's up rebels, come back in."

Naruto looked confused, again.

"It's time to assign chores."

"What do you mean chores?" Sakura asked, getting up to walk back in. Naruto followed her, though a bit more reluctant to do so.

"I'll explain later," he said quickly, "I don't want to leave Genma and Kakashi alone for too long."

"Why?"

Naruto didn't receive an answer, with only served to irritate him more. They followed Asuma as he led them through the maze known as Kakashi's abandoned house. It was still beautiful, but Sakura was thankful that the shock was wearing off.

"How do you know this place so well?" Naruto asked determined to get some reply, even if it wasn't the one from his first question.

Asuma spared them a quick glance over his shoulder before pulling out another cigarette. "We used to come here a lot as kids," he was obviously speaking of himself and Genma, "to play and train. It was fun."

"Why did Kakashi-sensei move out?" Sakura inquired trying to keep the conversation alive.

"He didn't want to live here anymore."

Unfortunately, it looked like she killed it whatever spark of small talk that had been born.

--

They found Kakashi and Genma bickering in the dining room. Their argument made no sense, but Sakura was sure that, like before, there was something more to it. They just wouldn't tell her. Bunch of bastards.

"Yo," came Kakashi's familiar greeting. "Good to see you back. You two disappeared for a while."

Sakura shook her head while she pull out a chair to sit down, "Find the backyard _should_ count as getting lost."

That earned chuckles and laughter from everyone but she and Naruto. The two survivors.

"You'll get used to it," Genma said competely at ease. "It may take some time, but after a while it grows on you."

"This coming from a man who had to have a five year old Kakashi show him the way to the bathroom countless times." Of course Asuma couldn't resist the chance to say something insulting. What was she doing thinking otherwise?

"Ok, we can get back to that later," Kakashi announced sensing that the future comebacks would only get louder and give him a headache. "Why are we here?"

Sakura tilted her head, "To assign chores. Didn't you know that?"

He shook his head, "No, Genma dragged me here without telling me."

"Is that possible?" she asked aloud. Could Kakashi, _the _Hatake Kakashi, be forcibly dragged to a room by a good-for-nothing blond?

Kakashi chuckled, "Well it looks like it."

Asuma sat up straighter, "I'll give out the chores then."

Naruto and Sakura grumbled. Kakashi sat quietly.

"Sakura will be taking over all womanly duties. Kakashi, you might have to teach Naruto how to clean, but he'll be taking care of straightening up. That leaves Kakashi to take care of the dogs, go back over what Naruto did, and make sure that Sakura didn't poison the food. All done," he leaned back with a smile.

Sakura glared at him. She would let that part about her poisoning the food pass but... "_Womanly duties?_"

"Sakura, he just meant motherly work, more or less, since Naruto and I don't have a clue how to run a household with more than one person living there," Kakashi tried to defend his friend. In truth, they all knew that Kakashi could run a house that had over 50 people and still have everything in perfect order. He could take up whatever position he needed to, and throwing it all on Sakura was just a way out.

She huffed. "You'd do just fine without me."

"But Sakura I'm injured," he pouted.

"Damn."

He grinned and she was sure that it was the largest, most annoying grin that had ever popped in to existence. And it was all because he knew that he had won.

--

"Well we should be getting back to the village," Asuma said. It was a little after noon and he was getting anxious. "One of the group will bring groceries regularly so you don't need to worry about that. The electricity and water and everything is working perfectly, so that leaves nothing undone."

"Thanks for everything," Kakashi said sincerely. "Tell Kurenai I said hey, and come over sometime if you can."

Genma threw his arm around Kakashi's shoulder, "Do you think any of us are going to miss your birthday?"

Kakashi looked regretful, maybe he shouldn't have given the invitation. Asuma laughed. "I'll make sure they don't do anything too bad. We can't have anything inappropriate going on around the kids, now can we?" he asked gesturing to Sakura and Naruto.

Sakura was sure that she had never seen Kakashi more grateful of their presence. Apparently his birthday was a torture fest and it was their job to save him. Now the only problem was that she didn't know exactly when Kakashi's psycho friends were going to show up. With them, it could be weeks after the actual birthday.

"Keep an eye on Genma for me. He'll get himself killed without-"

"Shut it Hatake. Everyone's surprised you're still here. You're worse than me!" Genma tried his best at the insult, but it was still not enough to hide his joy. Sakura could barely picture an unhappy Genma. "We'll see you around."

"Not really, I don't think I'll be going anywhere."

That was their goodbye. The retreating backs of Genma and Asuma struck worry through Sakura, just as she had anticipated it would. It was like Konoha was leaving them, and they had to be good and stay. There was no way to follow, no way to protect.

"Sakura, hurry up," she heard Kakashi call. She turned around to se him standing in the doorway with Naruto a little further inside the house, staring at her over Kakashi's shoulder. "Don't let it bother you. This is only temporary."

She didn't let his words sink in the way she usually did. They meant nothing to her, it was as if he hadn't spoken at all. There were only very vague things running through her mind now after his interruption of her panicking rant.

She noticed that he was walking on his own now. That was good, it meant he was already getting better. She sighed and walked behind them in to the large house that would serve as her home for the next few months.

Sakura went straight to her room, which was getting easier and easier to find. Once inside, she shut the door and plopped down on her bed. It probably wasn't good to spend all day in bed when you were a skilled konoichi, but right now she just wanted to be alone to think for a little while.

Most of her work would be in the kitchen. That was all right with her, she didn't really mind. Training under Tsunade, she had been the one who had cooked most of the blond Hokage's meals alongside Shizune.

--

Dinner was easy to make since the boys were so hungry that they really didn't care what it was she cooked. Fish and rice, that's all she was up for tonight. After dusting everything, cleaning up, and organizing her room, Kakashi had better be glad that he was even getting that. She fixed the food silently and sat it down on the table.

"Ready," she called. She was surprised at how fast Naruto appeared, seated in perfect posture and no drool sliding off his chin. Impressive. Kakashi was slower to get there, preferring a more casual pace. She almost laughed at the exaggerated difference. Naruto dug in.

Kakashi picked up his food, balancing everything on one arm. "I think I'll eat outside. The fireflies are quite beautiful out here."

She nodded, a little disappointed that he wouldn't be joining them. And he would be leaving her to fend for herself at a table with a super-stomach-blond, though Kakashi usually turned around so they wouldn't see his face. She couldn't really blame him though. From his conversations with Asuma and Genma, she knew he hadn't been here in a long time. He might just be missing the old scenery from home.

Sakura ate her rice slowly and quietly, trying to give Naruto some time to slow his pace. She looked at the mess he was making, a quick flash of irritation rushing through her. She decided that he would be the one cleaning that up, because she sure as hell wasn't. That, and she doubted Kakashi would even consider it. That man was so lazy.

"Sakura what do you think of this place?" Naruto asked after forcing down a mouthful of fish.

"It's nice," she answered, though she would have preferred the silence, even if it wasn't really silence, with Naruto it never was. She wanted to think in peace. "It's not what I expected it to be."

It definately wasn't a sewer, that was for sure.

"I know! Look at it, it's like a mansion!"

Sakura shook her head. She wouldn't reply to that. It wasn't a mansion but it wasn't tiny either. A thought occurred to her then. Compared with Naruto's life time apartment this place would appear huge. It seemed big even to her, and she had grown up in a twelve bedroom house.

She got up and put her dishes in the sink. She would be the one washing them anyway, so why not wait until everyone was done? She smiled at her hyper friend. "Finish eating Naruto. I'm going to go check on Kakashi-sensei."

She walked to the back door, her favorite exit. She figured that it wouldn't matter which door she used, Kakashi had only said that he was going outside. She only had to walk around to find him. The nighttime sky was glowing with stars, undisturbed by the city lights. The slip of moon was white against black. The forest behind the great tree in the middle of the yard was filled with flickering yellow lights. Kakashi was right, it was beautiful.

It distracted her so much that she didn't notice the bowl placed on the steps until her foot hit it. Kakashi had left it there. He must not have been in a hurry to get back inside. She looked back up and found him resting on one of the higher branches of what she was beginng to think of as his tree. He was looking down at the glowing bugs, she could tell, even though his back was turned to her.

"Hey Sakura," he said just loud enough for her to hear it. He didn't turn around to look at her, and his voice betrayed nothing.

"Hey," she whispered back. She was sure he could hear it. His sensitive ears could pick up just about anything, even with the soft buzz of the insects around them. She began walking towards him, mesmerised. "What is all this?"

"The fireflies," he chuckled. "I used to sit out here all the time and watch them. It's been a while since I've had the chance to sit still for any period of time."

She knew what he meant. He had been sent on missions constantly, by choice, but still. These smaller things in life, the things that you overlook, are the most pleasurable wonders. He seemed to understand that. "It's amazing."

She began to wonder why the dogs were quiet as she jumped up the thick branches to stand next to where he was comfortably sitting. The view was even more overwhelming. It was soothing and magical, she stared off in wonder. "How could you leave this place? It's so beautiful."

She said it before she had a chance to think it over. Worry over his reaction settled in her stomach as she remembered Asuma's vague, closing answer. He had done it for Kakashi, answered that way to protect him. What would Kakashi do when faced with it himself?

"It wasn't doing me any good. I was young and my parents were dead. I thought it would be better to live in the village, where I could train and get stronger." She could see him smile, but she knew that it was even more fake than anything Sai had ever done. She knew not to pry, Kakashi's business was his own, but somehow she felt that the information belonged to her as well. She was going to be living here, why shouldn't she know?

She stood up. "I should go make sure Naruto hasn't broken anything. Come inside soon, okay?"

He nodded.

As she walked back she thought she understood what he meant. That one clue, "my parents were dead," held a lot of meaning. What child would want to live in a place that would constantly remind them of the loved ones they had lost? She felt a rare surge of pity for Kakashi, but knew that pity wasn't what he had needed.

--

Sakura was exhausted. She had survived her first day in the Hatake house and she didn't think she could take anymore. Kakashi was like a dictator at times. He wanted things a certain way, and even though he done more than his fair share of the work, it didn't take that heavy load of work off his students' shoulders. At this point, she didn't think he cared. Right now, on her side of the house, you could see your reflection in the floors. She placed his pills and a glass of water on his bedside table and left.

Her shower was hot, thank god, but short. She couldn't stay in the comfort of the waters without going to sleep, she knew she couldn't. Now in bed, she groaned into her pillow, the sound came out muffled. She wrapped herself in the soft blankets and, just to have some sort of childish rebellion against Kakashi, promptly passed out.

She didn't dream, but she didn't feel like she slept well either. She was always on the verge of waking up, like she couldn't find the one thing that she needed to do before losing consciousness. She rolled over in frustration. It had to be the stress that this week had thrown on her. It had to be.

It was so quiet, the soft humming of the forest outside comforting in a way. She shut her eyes, waiting for sleep to find her. It didn't. A distant sound kept pulling her out of the fuzzy haze that lead to her unconscious bliss. It was strangled, gasping, and so frightening that she felt her heart begin to race.

She kicked the blankets off of her, her need to make sure her boys were alright overpowering her reasoning. She didn't bother to grab any more clothes, the shorts and T-shirt seemed like plenty to her, even as the cold air met the creamy skin of her legs. Goose bumps rose across her limbs, but she didn't care, it only added to her fear.

She raced across the hallway, pulling Naruto's door open. He was snoring, as always, lost in his dimwitted dreams. That left Kakashi to check on. The same cry tore through the night and she could feel her heart pounding against her chest. Was he in trouble again? Why was it _always_ him?

She ran down the halls, rushing to find the room that Kakashi had led her to before they had gone to bed. It couldn't be that hard, could it? The sound stopped, but Sakura didn't. She only ran faster.

Her shaking hadn't come, which surprised her, as this was a playback of her worst nightmares. She stood in front of the door that was the entrance to Kakashi's room. She was sure it was his. In this desperation everything, every detail, became so clear. She rushed into the room.

Kakashi was sitting up, his eyes wide and his mouth open, taking shaking breaths. He was staring had his palms, sweat running down his face and sinking into his mask. He was visibly trembling, worse than anything she had ever had. He didn't acknowledge her, not even when she came to stand the side of his bed. He was curled, his muscles tight.

"Kakashi-sensei..."

He didn't answer. It was like he still couldn't see her there.

"Kakashi," she said more urgently. His head lowered a little. She put her hand on his shoulder and turned him to her, her eyes filled with worry. She could feel the controllable tremors continue, and his eyes turned to her. They scared her. They were wide and fearful, so unlike anything she had ever seen of him. "What's wrong?"

"I-...Sak-kura..." he choked out. His voice was unsteady and quivering just as much as his body. Another gasp, or cry, she couldn't decide, broke through and jerked him forward. His hands clenched and gripped at the dark blankets spilled around his waist. "Go," he said more clearly, but still obviously strained. "Now."

He was fighting to gain control; of what, she didn't know. His perfect facade was broken, and this man underneath wasn't anything like she had expected. Cocky, stubborn, overconfident, possessive. Those she could have dealt with, but this was unstable. Now she understood what Tsunade had meant when she said that Sakura might lose a little sleep because of this. She thought she might lose a little piece of her sanity with it.

She crawled onto the bed and took his hands in hers. "Breathe," she commanded gently, "Calm down."

It was so strange, seeing him like this. He wasn't supposed to be this...uncertain. Kakashi's bravery was one of the many things everyone admired about him, right now he was as terrified as a child in a lion's cage. He took deep, uneven breaths. At least he was able to try to listen to her.

"I'm sorry," he whispered so quietly that she was sure she wouldn't have been able to hear him had she been any less close. "You...you shouldn't have to..."

His hands felt like ice. "Don't worry about me, just think about yourself. Try to relax."

Had he been trying to put himself at peace when watching the fireflies so this wouldn't happen? The act made so much more sense now. He held onto her hands, pulling them close to his chest. She couldn't pull away. Her attachment to him only made her want to comfort him more, because she felt that she was doing so little.

Tsunade couldn't be serious. Those pills wouldn't help his recovery, they could only damage it. He wasn't going to get any better with this coming out. This trauma.

Pity rose, even as she tried to stop it. It came with the irrepressible worry. What could have happened to him? She wanted to cry for him, so badly did she that she rested her chin on his shoulder, trying to comfort him with contact. Kakashi wasn't one to enjoy physical contact, no matter what, but at this point, in the state he was in, she doubted that he would object.

And he didn't. In fact, he buried his face in her soft hair. His trembles weren't stopping, and she hated that she couldn't do anything about it. This irrational protectiveness she had over Kakashi and Naruto was making this experience even worse. He was so courageous and strong, what could possible do this to him?

"Leave," he tried to beg, but it sounded so much like a wish that he didn't really want. She couldn't leave right now, even if she wanted to, not with him like this. Unthinkable.

"No." She had her final answer, and he couldn't order her to go. He wasn't able to right now. That was so frightening and alarming that she unconsciously took her right hand from his iron grip to wrap it around him. "I'm not going anywhere."

M**e again: I know that the whole thing with Kakashi is kinda messed up, and believe me I hated even trying to describe it, but it will all work in perfectly. Hopefully this story isn't too predictable and, in turn, boring. I'm trying to put together a Kakasaku fic that isn't cliched. As far as I've read, and I've been reading for a while, I don't think there are many, if any(hopefully), like this. And I promise not to make it _all_ depressing, because those just get on my nerves. **


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N: Merry Christmas!**

**Send Me An Angel: Chapter 5**

Sakura's eyes fluttered open as the sunlight peeked through the window on the opposite side of the room. The golden light spread across the floor in an awkwardly slanted rectangle. She pulled herself up and sketched.

"Good morning."

She nearly jumped at the sound disrupting the peaceful silence. Turning her head gave her an answer as to where the sound had come from. She smiled apologetically at the masked man next to her. "Morning."

Kakashi looked away from her, "Sorry about last night. You shouldn't have had to see that."

She noticed that she was still in his bed. At this point it really didn't matter. She had spent the better part of the night holding him until his trembling had calmed down and he had finally been able to fall asleep. "Don't worry about it. I'm glad I could help."

He didn't answer. He didn't know anyway to explain to her that he didn't want her to have this responsibility. It was bad enough that she had witnessed him in that state. It only made it worse that she had been the one to take the problem on as her own. He finally sighed. "Don't."

"What?"

"Don't try to help. I can handle it."

She didn't speak for a moment, only staring at him in disbelief. He called last night handling it? She knew at that moment that every single time she had thought him crazy had been proven true with just four words. 'I can handle it.' Ridiculous.

"You can't be serious."

"I am. It's not an issue that you need to concern yourself with. It's my..."

"Burden," she finished for him. "But it isn't one you have to endure alone."

He was again left without a way to answer. He had always suffered alone, it had always seemed like the right thing to do. He wouldn't drag someone else into his mess. Was she asking for it?

"Sakura...why?"

She wrapped her small hands around one of his and gently squeezed. "Because I care. We're in this together."

"No." Suddenly he knew how to answer. "You aren't going to get yourself into this madness."

"Do you think I can just stand by after last night?"

He flinched.

"Kakashi, it doesn't matter anymore. This_ madness_ is-"

"You shouldn't have seen that," he repeated. "It's not your problem. Stay out of it."

He got up and left, leaving her shocked. He really doesn't understand, she thought. He couldn't. What she had seen, what she had _felt _last night, had no equal. She didn't know how those pills made him like that, all she did know was that the next time she got a chance to deliver a message to Tsunade she was taking it. This wasn't something that could be left forgotten in the back of her mind. She would see that picture of pure fear in his eyes every time she saw him.

How did Tsunade expect her to be able to stand this?

--

She walked slowly to the kitchen, her mind elsewhere. Naruto's cheerful greeting and overly happy attitude wasn't enough to distract her. Her thoughts were set on Kakashi as she fixed herself something for breakfast. He was still there, shaking with fear in her mind, as she sat down to eat. His unsteady voice so clear to her that she felt like she was reliving last night's experience.

She stopped when she was halfway done with her food, no longer able to choke it down.

She was worrying again. Against everything that screamed at her to be pissed at him, she was worrying. She dumped what was left of her meal, then walked towards the back door. She had no idea where Kakashi was right now, but it didn't matter. She wanted to sit up in his giant tree and wallow in suppressed pain for a few hours.

He wasn't there. She was grateful for that. She wasn't sure how she would have reacted to him right now, if forced to face him. She was leaning towards the thought that she might have gone back to her room, but some other small part of her pulled her towards the idea that she would have tried to talk to him. It would have been stupid. Kakashi won't avoid her, she was relatively sure of that. He would just act normal. That was his way.

Her way was a little bit different. She would follow his lead, but she knew that she would be right back in the same position tomorrow. Tonight he would suffer through that same agony that tormented him. She wasn't sure how it worked. Maybe he dreamed of the thing that scared him so.

She jumped to a mid branch and leaned against the rough bark of the trunk. Dreams. Nightmares sounded more like it. But what could possibly scare him that bad? He _is the _Hatake Kakashi. He's strong and brave and...

She still felt like crying for him. It was a feeling that wouldn't go away.

Why was this happening? Had it always happened to him? A feeling of pure rage shot up through her at that thought. Why would anyone put him through that? He protected everyone he could, unless you were unfortunate enough to be his enemy. But right now it was his comrades, his _commander_, putting him through this. She still couldn't find the right words to describe it. She was beginning to settle on 'Kakashi's torture.' That sounded about as realistic as everything else in this place.

Sakura knew that she had a bad temper, she knew that better than anyone else, but she also knew that sometimes her temper had justification. There was a reason for it. At least with Kakashi there always had to be. She couldn't get mad at him without a rational excuse. If she did, and when she did, he always found a way to make her look like an idiot. And as frustrating as that was, she still couldn't stop herself from feeling what she felt now.

She felt pity, and worry, and pain. It wasn't her pain, but somehow it became hers. After going through that, after witnessing him in that condition, she couldn't sit back and act like nothing was wrong. How could he expect her to do that? She knew that Kakashi had always preferred to go solo, he like to work alone, but this was ridiculous. She won't resign herself to sitting through this like it was normal. Her decision was made. But...was this normal for him? An indescribable feeling sunk into her chest.

She couldn't stay up here any longer. If she did this feeling would only get worse with the thoughts that were sure to come next. She jumped down, not bothering to glance over at the dogs lounging around the shed to her left. It didn't matter. The beauty of this place no longer held any meaning. Kakashi's pain was all that was left, and she had to stop it.

She heard a chuckle come from behind her. After turning around she could honestly say that she wasn't surprised to find him standing there. Even as a Jounin she still couldn't sense Kakashi when he wanted to be sneaky. "What do you want?"

He pouted. "So harsh."

She sat down on what perhaps could have been the lowest branch that his tree had, it was the closest to her. She waited for him.

His smile warmed but didn't falter, it only lost its obvious amusement. "It's not that bad you know. I've dealt with it before."

So he had had time to compose himself. Wonderful. Now he as going to try to convince her of what he wanted her to believe, and then leave it at that. She lowered her eyes, staring at a patch of dark green grass. She waited for more. It would be best to let him get out everything he had planned and then get back at him when he had nothing left.

He knelt down. "It's nothing you need to worry about. I'll be fine."

She bit her lip, trying not to say anything was turning out to be harder than she had originally thought. Why did he have to make it so hard by saying stupid things like that?

"It's just the pills and this house. That's all."

Apparently he hadn't prepared much. "But Kakashi..."

But then again neither had she.

He cocked his head to the side, that soft smile still there. "Yes?"

She looked up. His dark eye seemed endless, and the curve of his face so gentle. She really hated that mask. "Why do you have to go through that? What could you have possibly done to deserve it?"

_"Even for a shinobi he isn't quite normal."_ Tsunade's words only supported her right now.

He shook his head. "I don't know. Maybe it's punishment for everything I've done, or maybe it's just bad luck. I have to go through it because there isn't any way around it. That's just all there is to it."

Punishment. That would be replaying itself in her mind almost as much as the scene of his torture. "All there is to it? But Kakashi, there has to be a reason for it. Things like that don't just happen regularly."

He grinned. "Since when have I ever been regular?"

Sometimes she could really hate him. She knew she couldn't win right now. He was persistent and could force you to do what he wanted anyway. "Never," she admitted giving in.

He looked at her for a moment. "You don't have to make this so hard. I just don't want Naruto getting worried too."

She would never know if that was an excuse or the truth, but she smiled. She smiled because either it was true, or at least he had gotten better at lying. "Yeah, I guess you're right. I just don't want you to think that you have to face it alone. I'm here. I can be there for you."

She could never understand. He knew she couldn't. He didn't_ want _her to go through that, but when she kept offering like that he was so tempted to say thank you. He wanted her there, he wanted her to hold him and tell him everything was going to be ok. But it wasn't right. She wasn't supposed to do that. It wasn't her responsibility.

He sighed and stared down at a blade of grass swaying gently in the wind. "Thank you, Sakura, really. But please don't do this. It isn't part of your job. You don't have to."

"Is that what you think?" She sounded like someone had just punched her in the stomach. "Part of my job?"

He had to look up, but once he did he wished he hadn't. She looked hurt, like he had caused her this pain. Guilt ran through him when he realized that he had, it was his fault that she staring at him in disbelief and agony. "Sakura..."

Her eyes were sharp, almost glittering. "Kakashi, is that what you think?"

"I don't know."

"That isn't an answer."

This time she didn't receive a reply. He looked down.

"How many times have I told you that it was because I cared?" she asked, her voice a whisper. "Did you ever hear me?"

"Sakura, I-"

He couldn't finish. He couldn't understand why he was constantly at a loss of words when it came to her. He took a deep breath. "I didn't know what to expect. I still don't."

"Then don't try to guess. You did that before and none of it turned out right. Naruto and I, do we even resemble what you thought that we would? No," she could answer that because he had never thought that she would become great, never thought that she could really be strong. "Life isn't predictable."

He chuckled softly to himself. "If only you knew how true that is."

"Try me."

He smiled at her, happy to see that she wasn't as troubled as before. "Life always gives you things that you never even thought of. As a shinobi, the truth of it is magnified. I can't predict anything, I can just ready myself for what might be thrown my way."

He's sharing his infinite wisdom, she thought lightly. He always was, in some form or another. It just depends on how he decided to teach it that day. Direct or indirect doesn't really apply to him. He could say nothing or do nothing at all, have no connection with a subject whatsoever, and yet you learn something essential.

"From what I know, there's a lot that's been thrown your way."

He stood up. "Yeah, well what can I do about it? The only thing I can think of is 'Sit back and enjoy the ride, buddy.'"

She almost laughed, almost. If she hadn't seen him so scared of that ride then she would have. She pushed herself up to stand in front of him. "Just let me be there," she whispered, losing her courage faster than she would have liked. "Let me help."

Kakashi sighed, with a hint of annoyance in his voice, while shaking his head. "I don't want you to hurt. Why can't you see that?"

She was definitely surprised, not shocked, but still surprised. "Hurt?"

He stared down at her. "You know it's true. You can't stand seeing me like that, it's painful for you. I don't want you to have that pain."

He made it sound like something else. Like he was a bad guy with an angel girlfriend. He wanted to protect her, she knew that much. But perhaps this time he didn't know how.

"I don't care," she said more firmly. "I just want to help you through it."

He laughed again, but this time it made her feel insulted. "Sakura, I'm not going to get through it. It's never going to be over. As soon as I'm done healing and don't have to take those pills anymore then I won't wake up like that anymore. But as soon as I'm hurt again those pills will be waiting right there."

He didn't like them, that was clear. They hurt him and she could see that. He hated them. For some reason, one that she understood very clearly, she hated them too. Her anger towards them made no sense, as they were not living things, but it wasn't something she could control. They hurt him, therefore they were evil. "Damn pills," she muttered.

He found that amusing.

--

Sakura was slowly beginning to memorize the half of the house that was open to her. The halls, doors, cabinets, and furniture all looked vaguely familiar now. She could reach her destination, which was almost something to brag about. She cleaned what she could, not knowing exactly how Kakashi would want something so delicate and expensive cleaned. His answer had surprised her. He put it simple, like he always does.

"Wet a cloth and wipe it down."

As soon as he left the room she had laughed at him. He was so careless. Then she reminded herself that Kakashi really didn't care. He could have lived _here, _in this gorgeous house with it's wonderful views, but instead he picked a one bedroom apartment in the middle of Konoha. He was a simple man with simple needs. She knew that he didn't require much, and she also knew that he could live on whatever he needed to for whatever period of time necessary.

That's what made him so different. He could tolerate things that would put her in the hospital. He was well respected for it. Who wouldn't be? Kakashi's approval was something of a blessing. But he put too much on himself. He carried too heavy a weight on his shoulders. No one should have to handle all of that. He had pulled her hand to his chest last night, that told her enough for her to be sure that he wanted her there. It was just that he was stubborn and over protective.

He didn't want to hurt her. Tch, right. What about him? Wasn't he hurting so much more? He's a guy, and they don't think the same. They're hard headed and annoying. She could _beg _him to let her help him, and he would still refuse. Kakashi thought on a different level. Once he was focused and determined it was useless to try to persuade him into something else. He held his ground, which is more than she could say for most.

He had spoken of punishment, but what punishment was he referring to? Surely he hadn't done anything that would cause him to suffer like this. She thought back to everything she knew about him. Only one thing even began to make sense. He had said that he killed an entire village, children included. Could that be what he meant?

She paused mid stroke, staring down at the wet tiles beneath her. He blames himself. He feels guilty about what happened. She shouldn't be surprised. Kakashi feels guilty about so many things that it should just be considered part of his personality by now. That was sad though. Guilt being part of a person's personality is wrong. There are so many things that can help you make it up to them though.

Inner Sakura couldn't help herself. _How can you make it up to someone who knows that you murdered their baby?_

Sakura didn't know how to answer, and she wished that her alter ego had just kept her mouth shut. She could have lived without that thought.

If it had been her, then what would she do? In Kakashi's position she probably would have refused the mission. She knew that he didn't though; at least not to her knowledge. Kakashi demands more missions than anyone else can handle. He would never turn one down. But it sounded like this one was one that he would have crumpled up and threw at the Hokage. Strangely enough, she could picture him doing just that.

In the position of those villagers, she would hate him. She knew she would. If she had a child and he took him or her away to be killed, to do it himself, she could never forgive him. His apologies would mean nothing. They would be empty, void of any of the deep sorrow that she felt.

From her personal point of view, she knew Kakashi better. His pain was real. It was just as deeply carved into him as it was to them. The only difference is that they were dead as well, killed by his own hand. That must hurt him, sharper than a flesh wound ever could.

She shook her head, trying to ignore it. Kakashi's pain was one of types that could spread. It wasn't quite like Naruto's and Gaara's. Naruto wanted to prove to people that he was better than they thought he was. Gaara had just inflicted pain on those who caused his own. Eventually even that fierce redhead figured it out. The more pain that is caused, the less that is resolved. You can't expect to end your suffering by passing on that misery.

Kakashi's was like Sasuke's. It was one that they carried alone. Sasuke's pain was the loss of his family at the hands of his older brother, but what was Kakashi's?

It doesn't really matter, she decided. She loved him, and that's all she really needed to know. She would try to help him, even if he hated her for it. She couldn't stop herself. When she tried to remember last night she felt like balling up and crying. She would protect him, even if what she could do was limited.

She doubted knowing what was causing this would make any difference. Trying to comfort him with soft words and gentle hugs, that's all she could do. She sighed. Kakashi always made things so difficult, even when he was trying to make them simple.

--

Naruto whistled happily to himself in a tune that only he knew as he walked next to the side of the house. Sakura had been acting pretty weird lately, but hey, since when was anyone on this team _not _completely insane? He knew he rocked, at least he had that much. Sakura's temper was scary, so she had that. And yeah, Kakashi-sensei could act cool sometimes, but everyone knows he's a pervert.

Naruto kicked a rock with the toe of his shoe and watched it skid across the yard. That damn tree got in the way so he couldn't measure the distance properly. Why did every thing that Kakashi-sensei have want to challenge him?

First there was that mutt. The one with those really sharp teeth that never stops growling. Then it was those bed sheets when he was searching the room. And now it's a tree, a _tree_. Did he somehow train that too? Knowing Kakashi, Naruto doubted that there was anything the man couldn't do when he had his mind out of the gutter.

But, even if that tree hated him, he would not let it ruin his day. The sun was shining brightly above him and the wind was cool against his skin. Everything felt so perfect. It was peaceful, so wonderfully calm that even he couldn't scream to break the silence. This place was really something, he decided. It was like a dream. Even in his darkest hour Naruto would bet that he could find peace here.

Well, sorta. It would calm him down at least. He continued walking, slacking off his chores since what he did was going to be redone anyway.

Then he heard it. That evil noise that sneaks up on you when you're least expecting it. Barking.

_Damn_, he thought as he turned around to see what it was. It was him. That same stupid mutt. His fur was standing on end, his lips pulled back into a snarl, a deafening growl coming from his throat. He looked ready to kill. Naruto turned back around slowly. _Damn, damn, damn, damn!_

The sound of paws hitting the earth again was the gunshot to the race. Naruto took off, running as fast as he could. What the hell was going on? He knew he wasn't exactly nice to this dog, but did he honestly deserve _this_?

He felt teeth graze across his ankles_. Shit, this dog is fast. _

He could hear Sai now. "I'm gonna miss you, Dickless Wonder, I really am."

If anyone ever saw him it would be the end. No Hokage. None. That dream would be history. Who would want a Hokage who is scared of a puppy? He knew that he would argue it_. Puppy my ass, _was the only thought running through his mind.

He jumped towards the first door he could find, figuring that the house was his best bet. The dogs never came in the house. If he survived, he could brag that this saved him: his ninja skills of observation. Konohamaru would laugh. He tripped, but pushed himself forward. This was the finish line to the race. He dragged his feet inside the house's protective barrier.

To his surprise that mutt kept coming, jumping onto the floor and continuing his run. Naruto felt a quick flash of disappointment that the dog had gotten a headstart as well, but that feeling was replaced as soon as teeth snapped together where his head had been only a moment before.

He stumbled to his feet and ran. Something was seriously wrong with this dog. Maybe it had rabies or something. Yeah, that or Kakashi had fun with this one. He could picture it clearly. His sensei always did find it amusing to mess with the meaner ones. Look at Sasuke.

Naruto felt something snag on his foot, then he banged the back of is head against something hard, really hard. He could feel the blood rushing to his head. He forced his eyes open. Everything was upside down. "Fuck."

"Watch your language Naruto," Kakashi said. He stared down at his student, and Naruto could see the amusement glittering in that dark eye. "You should look where you're going."

Naruto looked at his ankle. There was a silver wire, usually used for trip wire, wrapped around his right foot. It hit him then, like a ton of bricks dropping on top of him out of nowhere. "You did this, you bastard!"

Kakashi grinned, "Payback's a bitch, isn't it?"

Naruto groaned.

--

Kakashi stayed for dinner that night, as Sakura had cooked his favorite dish. He turned around to eat, as always, but he was finished so fast that it didn't seem like it would have matter if he hadn't. He stayed with them while they ate. Naruto was suspicious. After what had happened earlier, who could blame him?

Kakashi had made it perfectly clear that not a word of what had happened was to be spoken. Naruto was forbidden to tell Sakura. Well, technically he _could _tell her, but Kakashi promised him that his favorite dog would be enjoying his company from that moment on. Personally, Naruto would rather die. He _hated_ that _thing_. Of course, he could never tell Kakashi this. It's anyone's guess what would happen if he did.

"No training," Kakashi said. Naruto was surprised. Everything had just been so quiet.

"What do you mean?" Sakura asked carefully.

"You both make too much noise when you train, it might attract attention. You can still do exercises in your room, but that's what you're limited to. No super strength punches and no rasengans. Got it?"

Naruto felt like someone had just dropped a bomb on him. No training? Why not just kill him?

"I won't be training any more than you," he continued. "It's an order from Tsunade. We were sent here to keep a low profile, giant blasts might turn a few heads. The Akatsuki would be here faster than we could think to leave."

Kakashi held back a chuckle at Naruto's crestfallen expression.

"Yes sir," Sakura replied obediently. "And what about chakra meditation?"

Kakashi thought for a moment. "As long as it doesn't get farther than your room I will consider it regular exercise."

Naruto opened his mouth to say something but Kakashi beat him to it. "I don't want to hear it. No complaining."

"Fine."

Naruto had gone back to eating, ignoring Kakashi and Sakura's polite conversation. He didn't really care. They were having a talk about _nothing._ What was the _point _of eavesdropping on that?

Naruto leaned back in his chair. "Hey, Sakura?"

She turned to him. "Yeah?"

"Where were you last night? There was no one in your room this morning."

She had a fleeting moment of panic.

"She was helping me," Kakashi answered. "The dogs got riled up and were pretty noisy. They woke her up and she came out there to see what was going on."

"And?"

"There was a bear."

Naruto stared at Kakashi silently for a moment. "You're really bad at lying Kakashi-sensei."

"No, it's true," Sakura interrupted. "It had brown fur and was really big. I think the barking scared it off though."

Naruto turned his eyes back to her. "I didn't hear anything."

Kakashi got up. "Naruto, you wouldn't be able to hear anything less than two pots banging together right next to your ear."

If only that wasn't true, Naruto would have a case.

--

Sakura lay awake that night. She couldn't sleep. She knew that it was late, and she still hadn't heard a peep from Kakashi's room. She sat up and ran a hand through her messy hair. She felt exhausted, but maybe she might sleep better if she just checked on him. If she knew he was alright then she could sleep peacefully.

She slipped from her bed mutely, grabbing a pair of loose pants to wear. It was oddly cold. She left her door open as she went, it wouldn't matter, she was coming back anyway. She could make out Naruto's loud snoring, the sound of her footsteps so soft that it was bearly noticeable. She was worrying again, but she knew she would. What was surprising her was that she hadn't heard Kakashi's quick gasps or quiet cries.

His room was so easy to find, as she had memorized it just so she could be there faster when he needed her. For some reason she felt like an intruder right now. If he didn't need her, if he wasn't suffering right now, then wouldn't this be more like pestering?

She heard it, that soft whisper. It was so hard to even hear that she couldn't make out the words. She pushed the door open, not caring if he thought she was just butting in.

He was laying on his side, curled up with his hands gripping his sheets so tight that she could see the white of his knuckles. His eyes were clenched shut, his hair flying everywhere. He was still wearing his mask. She could only guess that it was because he knew she would come. He was trembling, predictably, but still painfully.

"No...please don't..." His voice sounded so broken, like he was crying. She saw no tears, but it still ripped her heart in two. A whimper escaped his lips, and she walked forward on unsteady legs.

"Stop," he begged, but she couldn't tell if he was speaking to her or not. "Please stop. Don't do it!"

"Kakashi..." She reached forward.

"No!" He jerked forward, sitting upstraight, his eyes wide. They were huge, like a child's. "Why?" he choked.

She stopped. "Kakashi?"

He looked up at her, a small flame of anger in his eyes that was overcome so greatly with fear. "N-no."

This was different, it wasn't like last night. He had been awake from the start the night before, but now she had seen him bearing the full weight of this pain. She sat down on the edge of the bed, but he pulled away. "G-go...please..."

The experience was so fresh, he hadn't had the time to compose any part of himself as he had last night. He was so unbearably hurt. She shook her head, "No, I'm staying. Don't you remember?"

She knew what he would say if he could. _I remember telling you to stay the hell away, that's what. _

She grabbed his hand, gently coaxing him into loosening his fierce grip on the blanket. He let go, and she held his hand in her own, rubbing it tenderly. He relaxed slightly, and she slid closer. "It's ok," she whispered. "I'm here, it's ok."

He laid his head on her shoulder and pulled her hand to press it against his chest. She could feel his heart racing in strong, quick beats. She used her other hand to rub his back, reciting comforts in his ear.

"Go," he said after a while. "Get out."

He only pressed her hand against his chest with more force, like he was telling himself no. He wanted her to stay, he just didn't know how to go about it.

She pushed him back, and the betrayed look he gave her almost made her jump forward to hold him. She laid down beside him, Kakashi keeping her hand against his heart. She used her other arm to prop herself up with her elbow, but her fingers ran through his soft hair, smoothing it affectionately. She began to hum, though she didn't know why she did. He snuggled closer to her.

She remembered a song her father used to sing to her as a child to put her to sleep. She would ask him to sing it over and over again, just listening to his voice. Thankfully, she remembered the words as well.

"Well everybody wants a little piece of my time  
But still I put you at the end of the line  
How it breaks my heart to cause you this pain  
To see the tears you cry falling like rain"

She closed her eyes and rested her forehead gently on the side of his head.

"Give me the chance to prove  
And I'll make it up to you"

She kissed the top of his head.

"I still believe in you  
With a love that will always be  
Standing so strong and true  
Baby, I still believe in you," she laid down, her head falling on the pillow next to his, "and me."

He stared at her, his eyes full of wonder, even as his body shook in fear.

"Somewhere along the way, I guess I just lost track  
Only thinking of myself, never looking back"

She smiled sadly.

"For all the times I've hurt you, I apologise  
I'm sorry it took so long to finally realize

"Give me the chance to prove  
That nothing's worth losing you-"

He pressed his forehead to her lips. "I don't need anyone telling me they believe in me Sakura," he said, and she took note that his voice was so much stronger, even if it was lower than a whisper.

She reached down to grab the dark blanket, pulling it over both of them. "I do." She'd always believe in him, but getting him to understand that he's worth believing in was so much easier said than done.

He pressed his cheek against her throat and closed his eyes. "Thank you...so much."

Sakura felt like crying again. She held her breath for a few long moments to help push that lump in her throat back down. Crying could only make this worse. She knew Kakashi well enough to know that he would bolt the door down to keep her out if he saw even a glimmer of a tear.

_"It breaks down most of the walls he's built up over the years, and that allows his emotions to...make their presence known." _

Tsunade's choice of words couldn't have been more accurate.

Kakashi squeezed her hand. "Are you ok?"

His voice was weak again, and she could barely stand hearing it. "That's what I should ask you."

He looked up at her, and she saw a similarity that she hadn't before. His eyes, huge and round, reminded her of a puppy that had been abused and tormented. That knot tightened in her throat, and she closed her eyes and swallowed to force it back down. When she opened her eyes, he was still staring at her.

"Sakura, you should leave."

He sounded like a child, a hurt, helpless child.

"No," she choked out, wrapping her spare arm around him and pulling him as close to her as she could. "I told you before, I'm not leaving. Don't try to talk me out of it. Don't tell me to get lost. Please, let me stay."

She felt him sob against her, but as she pulled back she could tell that it was one that refused the company of tears. "Fine," he breathed, shaking.

She waited for a few moments, his eyes holding her in place. His face crumpled in pain. His voice was so agonized and frightened finally broke through. "Sakura, don't leave me."

So she had been right, he didn't want her to go. He had been forcing himself to play the role of the strong leader, even when she knew that he had been breaking down. She pulled him back to her. After that, she knew she couldn't go, even if she wanted to. Her job, her obligations, her beliefs, they meant nothing. It couldn't _even _compare to how she felt when he said that to her. To watch his barrier be ripped from him, it was worse than when Sasuke had left her.

"It's going to be ok," she said over and over, to both him and herself. "Nothing's going to happen."

"But Sakura," he whispered, "it already has."

"What?"

He didn't answer. Even under this pressure, even going through this hell, Kakashi knew when to stop. He knew when he had said enough. He sobbed again, against his will. She held on to him tighter.

"Kakashi, I won't ask what's wrong, but I need you to trust me."

He was so grateful that she wouldn't call him sensei when they were together like this, it would have added humiliation to the pain. What did she mean by trust her? Of course he trusted her, he was letting her stay in here wasn't he?

He nodded, not trusting his voice.

She smiled, and it brightened a piece of his soul. There was a true joy behind it, a beautiful, innocent happiness. He wanted it to stay like that. He wanted that soft smile on her lips always. In his current state he would do anything to keep it there.

"Stay still," she commanded. She focused her chakra, sending it to her right hand. "This will only take a second."

He shut his eyes. "I believe in you too Sakura."

She felt her heart flutter.

He opened his eye just in time to see her radiant smile. A joy he couldn't remember feeling filled him.

She gently placed her hand on his forehead. This wasn't nearly as hard as recreating his gut. She was simply giving him back a piece of his composure. She was working to stop his shaking, though she couldn't do it completely. He would be able to talk at the very least.

She was done in a few moments. When he opened his eyes again they were the same strong, bored pair she was so used to seeing. He turned to her, "Hey."

"How do you feel?" she asked in concern.

"Better," he rolled onto his side to face her. "Thank you."

She sighed, relief washing over her. She wouldn't be able to do that every time, every night, but at least she could save him just this once. It was stupid really. It could mess up his recovery, but she had to. "_Sakura, don't leave me."_ She shuddered. Anything but that.

She stared at him, not able to contain her smile. He was alright, and that was all that mattered to her right now. "I told you it would be ok."

He smiled at her for once, and it was like a light in the dark. "Yeah."

"Do you want me to leave?"

_Please don't say yes,_ she prayed. _Please._ She wanted to stay with him so badly.

He didn't answer at first, and the wait was driving her insane. Finally she just sat up to go.

"No, Sakura, I don't. I don't want you to leave me."

He just had to use the words that broke her defenses. She took a deep, calming breath. "Then what do you want me to do?"

He couldn't answer. How could he ask her?

He ignored his basic communication methods and just weakly gripped her arm. She looked down at him, and he tugged gently. As soon as she fell back on the bed he wrapped his arms around her and pulled her to him. "Stay."

They lay like that for almost an hour. It was weird, but not uncomfortable. Him holding her so close was just surprising. It just didn't seem like something Kakashi would do. It must be the pills, he doesn't have as much control over his emotions. It would make sense that he would act more rashly.

She listened to his steady heartbeat. "Did they have a nurse stay with you in the hospital?"

He knew what she meant. Had anyone been given the job of comforting him?

"No," he answered softly. "Tsunade used to take care of me when it happened...when I was a child, but it just seems ridiculous to ask it of her now. She makes sure everything is alright though."

Sakura nodded. So this thing that tormented him, it was as real as any part of him. It must have occurred when he was very young since he said that it even burdened him when he was a child. "It's so unfair."

"Since when is life fair?" he asked as he hid his face in her hair, the sweet scent of it numbing to his sensitive nose.

Since when had he stopped feeling like a teacher? She guessed it happened when Naruto came back and they became equals. He was still the leader, that was obvious, but he was more of a friend.

"Oh, how did Naruto get a cut on his ankle?"

"Hm?"

"I healed him earlier today. It looked like something he might get from training, but I don't think that even Naruto would be able to do that to himself."

"Never thought it would take him that long to get out," Kakashi mumbled into her cherry locks. It shouldn't have taken him that long, not long enough for the wire to cut his skin.

"What?"

"Oh nothing," he sighed. "Naruto and I just had a little heart ot heart."

"About what?"

"Guy stuff."

She really didn't want to know how that tied into Naruto hurting his ankle.

"Don't do it again, ok?"

"Who said I did it?"

She shook her head slightly. "Just don't."

"It was his fault."

"It always is."

Kakashi chuckled, and she savored the deep rumble and slight shake of his chest.

"So what did he do to deserve that?" she asked curiously.

"Mud," was his annoyed answer. "Lots of mud."

**Yay! Kakashi finally got his revenge, and he's not being so stubborn anymore. It's so hard to keep them in character, I'm still not sure if I'm doing it right. ****Oh, and the song is "I Still Believe In You" by Vince Gill. I listen to it almost every morning in the car, so you can see how it fit in so easily. The next few chapters are going to be a little hard to write, so they'll take a while. I really hope all of you have enjoyed this so far! **


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N: So sorry that it's been so long since my last update. This story just sort of got put on hold. **

**Send Me An Angel: Chapter 6**

The next morning did not resemble the last. When Sakura woke up she knew where she was before she opened her eyes. She was warm and fuzzy, not yet entirely awake. Another difference was Kakashi. He wasn't up before her, and he wasn't telling her to stay away.

She stared at him. He looked so peaceful; so much younger than he usually did. He regularly made himself appear bored and indifferent, now he was tranquil. Soft silver strands that needed to be cut fell over his closed eyes gently. His breath came in a steady rhythm. He was an angel without a face. She was glad that the burdens he carried left him for a few hours. He deserved that much.

She smiled to herself, listening to the forest wake up outside the walls of this home. The soft noise caused Kakashi to stir. He lay still for a moment before his dark eye fluttered open. Its depth astounded her.

"Good morning. Did you sleep well?" she asked.

He turned to her and, even though she couldn't see it, she knew he smiled. "Great, thanks. Why are you up so early?"

She laughed quietly. "I'm not. The sun's already up, silly."

Kakashi looked around the room. When his eye came back to rest on her his smile was

still there. "I've never slept like that before."

"Maybe it's because you weren't so distracted and finally got a chance to actually sleep?"

"Maybe," he murmured vaguely as he got up and popped his back. She had never noticed how muscled he was. It made the vision of him trembling in fear even more surreal.

"Thank you."

"For what?"

He lay back down, apparently not wanting to start the day just yet. When he looked at her she felt her breath catch. His eyes had never been so warm. "For being there for me. For believing in me."

If only he knew how most people saw him. If only he could realize how protective she felt of him. "I wanted to," she whispered. "I still do."

He shut his eyes. Forming words to explain himself had never been his forte. Acting like something he wasn't, now that was something he could handle. When he opened his eye to stare back into hers the pure brightness of them stunned him to joy. He couldn't stop his smile. "I don't know how to say it."

"Say what?"

"Say how grateful I am. There are no words to describe it."

She wanted to pull him close; to hold him to her. She knew that she couldn't though, not

right now. He would have to be the one to make contact first. Her doing it, her holding him like that, would not be appropriate when he didn't need it. She smiled back at him sadly. "I wish there was more I could do."

His touch was so gentle as his strong fingers tucked a strand of pale pink hair behind her ear. "You've done more than enough."

She closed her eyes, leaning into his hand. He didn't pull away. "I'm so worried."

"About what?"

She looked at him seriously. "About you. About those nightmares."

She felt his hand flinch, such a small movement. He sighed. "I'm fine. Stop worrying so much."

She put her hand on his. "What are those dreams about?"

"How do you know it's dreams?" he asked playfully.

"I saw you, last night, when you were sleeping."

His eyes widened slightly, but then softened. "And?"

"It was so strong," she squeezed his hand tighter, "so painful."

"Did I say anything?"

"Do you usually?"

"Sometimes," he shrugged. "I'm not awake at the time so I can only tell you what Tsunade told me."

He had never been so open with her. In all the time she had known him never had he willingly given any information of his past. Being in his childhood home must be affecting him more than she had originally thought. She didn't want to be here. She didn't want him here.

"You kept asking someone to stop," she admitted. "You kept begging them."

He didn't show any reaction to this, and that alone intensified her worry. He sighed before turning his hand slightly to curl his fingers around hers. Then he smiled gently. "Don't burden yourself so much Sakura. You have Naruto to worry about, not me."

"Naruto's not in trouble right now." She couldn't believe he was actually trying to get rid of her again. "Why are you pushing me away?"

It sounded weird. That was definitely not something she had ever thought she would say to Kakashi, or rather ask. She saw a cloud of guilt cover his eyes as he ran a finger along the skin beneath her eyes.

"You're losing sleep because of this," he muttered. He sounded angry.

"I don't adjust well to new homes." Were the bags under her eyes really that noticeable? She cursed her rotten luck. Of _course _she would have to be on the team with the most stubborn people alive. It seemed like talent went hand in hand with stubbornness.

She watched him shake his head.

"It's pointless to lie to me," he told her. "I can see right through it."

If only that wasn't true. She wished none of this had happened. She wished Naruto had never had a demon sealed inside him. She wished Kakashi had never been hurt. She wished her team hadn't fallen apart. She wished she didn't know that wishes don't come true.

"Sakura?"

She hadn't really began crying had she? Please no.

"Are you ok?"

Damn it all. She wiped furiously at the tears. A ninja wasn't supposed to cry. When had she ever seen Kakashi shed a tear? When had she ever seen him even come close? The answer was as clear as day. Never. Even when Sarutobi died Kakashi had managed to look strong. It contrasted to violently with the man she had seen last night. "I'm fine."

He gently wiped a tear from her cheek with his thumb. When she looked back up to him she saw that depthless black gaze that stole her breath away. "It's going to be alright," he said confidently. "Nothing's going to go wrong. And I'll be fine."

"You've broken promises before."

As soon as the words left her mouth she regretted them. That black eye took on a sharpness that she was more used to seeing in battle. It pained to her to think that it was a defensive shield somehow. His hand began to inch away, but she held it tightly.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean it," she whispered.

He wouldn't talk. She knew that. If there were ways to make Kakashi hurt worse she would take his pain as her own with joy that it wouldn't be his. She doubted he could ever forgive her for that. It wasn't his fault that Sasuke wasn't with them. It wasn't his fault that Naruto was being hunted. How could she possibly blame him? Guilt combined with the arrival of a heavy weight on her chest forced more tears out.

"Don't cry," he said, she thought it was almost teasingly. "I'm not mad."

Looking at him now she could see how selfless and courageous he really was. He was hiding his pain to stop hers. She didn't deserve it. Even so, she would be lying if she said that she wasn't grateful for it.

"Guilt doesn't suit you Sakura. You should be happy and grinning like an idiot right beside Naruto."

That surprised her. "What?"

She was again surprised, but to a further degree, when he pulled her in for a hug. "My team isn't dark Sakura. You and Naruto are almost always shining. It sucks when you both get depressed."

She laughed quietly into his shoulder. That seemed to satisfy him. He pulled back to smile widely at her. She wished she could see it.

"So when are you going to show us your face?"

"What's with the sudden curiosity?"

"I promise not to be depressed for months if you show me."

He thought that over for a long moment, letting her excitement build up. Then he just grinned at her. "You wouldn't be anyway, just because you would finally have accomplished one of your lifelong dreams. I don't think I'm going to show you right now though, it might ruin the surprise."

Her disappointed look must have been rather funny because he seemed to be having a good time laughing at her.

"You _are _going to show it to us then?"

He shrugged. "Maybe."

"You're so vague."

"You're so nosy."

"That's just mean. Do you any idea how frustrating it is to know a guy for _years_ and not know what he looks like?"

"No, but I know how much fun it is being that guy."

"Annoying."

"Amusing."

She sighed, then smiled. He had so easily changed her mood. "You're good."

"At what?" He was mocking her, but she had to stop and think about that for a second.

"At just about everything actually," she answered.

"You flatter me."

"Don't let it go to your head."

--

With a victorious grin that would put Naruto to shame, Sakura slammed the damp rag into the bucket that had been her companion since her arrival and threw her arms in the air with a loud cheer. "Yes! I did it!"

It had taken her a while, but she had done it. She had finished cleaning Kakashi's mansion, and she was _proud._ Any lone woman would be.

Naruto strode into the room with more style than Sakura was used to him having. He was even beginning to resemble Kakashi in the way he stood, slouched with his hands in his pockets. His bright eyes marked him as far different from their former teacher, however. He whistled under his breath. "Nice."

"Thank you," she said, her prideful grin probably casting a glow.

Naruto went about the room with a respectable pace, inspecting her work. He had already seen the other rooms. Before he finished, Kakashi came in.

"I did it," she informed him.

"I heard."

"Pretty cool, huh?"

He shrugged. "It only seems big because you only did one room a day. It takes longer that way, you know."

She stuck her tongue out at him, not allowing him to ruin her fun.

--

That night she waited, sitting on the edge of her bed. He wouldn't tell her to leave again, she was sure of that. Only this time she wouldn't be able to give him a release. He would have to endure his pain. She couldn't save him by lessening the effects with her chakra. For all she knew it might be hurting him more than helping him. She hid her face in her hands, trying to prepare herself for the sight that would last much longer than last night. She bit her lip, holding back a sob that was meant to accompany the mental picture. Would she ever get over this?

She took a deep breath to calm herself. She just needed to send a message to Tsunade and wait for the reply. After that she would be able to set aside her worries with Tsunade's confident answer. It was to be expected. Tsunade was always blunt, but in a way that made Sakura feel better. Tsunade had become like a second mother to her over the years.

Sakura pulled a light blanket over her shoulders. It was chilly. Pulling up her legs she wrapped her arms around her knees and waited again for those soft cries that would be her signal to go.

She had too much time to think. Visions of the past few nights with Kakashi swam freely in her mind. The most fearsome of them comparing itself to the man she had seen fighting not so long ago. That warrior who had slaughtered all of those men was now bowing to the effect of two seemingly harmless white pills. Fear had never struck Kakashi the way it did now. He was so different when under that medication's influence. Him breaking down was like seeing Tsunade give up her sake. It was still unbelievable.

A soft gasp tore through the night, alerting her to Kakashi's now intense nightmare. Was the whole nightmare scary, or just the ending? She would never gain the courage to ask.

Her first mistake of the night was not making sure her foot steps were silent. The quiet patter of her feet across the wooden floors as she went to get her pants could have done the trick. She raced to Kakashi's room. Once there and inside she clicked the door shut behind her. His breathing was irregular, coming in quick gasps. The now familiar sheet of sweat covered his forehead, dampening his hair. He was shaking again...and talking.

"No," he whispered. "Why did you...? I..."

If he were crying then the vision might have been appropriate. But he wasn't, and the tearless sobs that tore through his body were wrong, out of place. She walked forward without hesitation. From experience she knew that the faster she got to him the easier it would be to soothe him. He couldn't wallow in his pain as much when he was trying to hide his fear from her.

"Damn it," he cursed loudly. "You idiot."

That was unexpected, to say the least. What could he be talking about?

"Don't die..."

She ran to the bed now. So it was deaths that haunted him. It made her stomach hurt and her insides twist. She could see him biting his cheek through the dark, even through the mask. She put her hand on his shoulder, and he woke instantly, a strangled cry buried in his throat. He panted like he had run around the entire village five hundred times without stopping as he looked around. When his eyes found her a look of disgust crossed his face and he jerked his head away. He muttered one unsteady word to himself. "Weak."

His trembles didn't stop, and even with the image of his eyes so freshly cut in her mind, she crawled into the bed. He was turned away from her, laying on his side. She laid her head higher on the pillow that his, wrapping her left arm around him and smoothing his hair with her right hand. She pressed herself against him, trying to give him as much comfort from physical contact as she could. After a few minutes of her humming softly in his ear he took the hand that she was holding him with and held it against his chest.

"Sakura, what's happening?"

There was her second, and ultimate, mistake. Naruto. Twisting her head she could see him standing there in the doorway. His eyes were wide and frightened. She decided delaying this would be best.

"Please, let me explain this later," she whispered.

"I heard crying."

She felt Kakashi tense.

"What's wrong?" he asked, though it sounded more like a firm command than a question.

"Please," she begged quietly, thinking of Kakashi and how he didn't want Naruto to bear the burden of this. "Go back to bed."

"Not until I know what's going on," he declared. He began to walk towards them, despite her pleas for him to leave. He gasped when he saw him. Turning back look at Kakashi she could see that his eyes were squeezed shut, his jaw set. A glance back in Naruto's direction was all she needed. A look of horror was streamed across his face.

"How?" he breathed.

"Please, go."

This time he didn't argue. He left slowly, his feet now unsteady. Was that how she had been the first time she had seen Kakashi like this? She knew it must have been similar. No wonder Kakashi had fought so hard to keep her away. She never wanted to see that look on Naruto's face again.

"I'm so sorry," she whispered to Kakashi. Naruto shut the door behind him. Kakashi pressed her hand tighter to his chest, placing it at his heart. He forgave her in that instant; he didn't blame anyone. He didn't trust his voice enough to say it, but she could tell. She pulled him closer to her, and waited for sleep to come.

--

She avoided Naruto as long as she could. It was impossible to stay away from him forever, his room was across from hers after all. She just didn't expect him to meet her in Kakashi's tree. His approach had been silent, perfect. His voice had been soft. "Is that why you weren't in your room before?"

"Yes."

He sat down next to her, staring out across the slightly grey clouded sky. His orange jacket was left unzipped and swayed easily with the light breeze. "Sakura, what was that?"

"That's what those pills do to him."

Naruto tilted his head up at the same moment she lowered hers. "I thought it was some animal making those sounds."

She didn't answer.

"Tell me more."

"There's nothing left to tell."

He sighed. "Sakura, I'm trying very hard to not get angry that you both lied to me about this. We're a team, or so I thought. Teammates are supposed to stick together."

"I know," she whispered, her voice low with emotion.

"So don't keep me in the dark any longer," he smiled, though with a hint of sadness.

She took a deep breath, and then wrapped her arms around herself. "He won't tell me anything important. Just that it's those pills and that this house intensifies it...I didn't know what to do. I'm trying to make it easier for him. I'm trying to be there for him. He didn't want me to see him like that, not ever."

"I can understand why."

"Naruto, he didn't want us to know."

There was a moment of silence. "And those sounds...?"

She steadied her voice. "When he sleeps, it happens then. He dreams and I don't think it's about flowers and rainbows. It's something bad. They're nightmares and they scare him. I'm glad you didn't see him when I did. It was so much worse."

"Worse?"

She looked at him, staring into his suddenly less bright blue eyes. "A lot worse."

Naruto released an unsteady breath. "Is he alright?"

"I'm not sure. He's taken those pills in the past, and they've healed him then, but I think it

was only physically."

"What does he dream about?"

"Don't know."

Naruto shut his eyes. "This sucks."

"You think?"

"Is there anything I can do?"

She shook her head. "Just try not to bring it up, okay? I don't think he likes us even knowing that he gets like that. He hates it."

"Alright."

"Thank you."

"What are you thanking me for?"

He didn't get a reply.

--

Naruto was distant for the rest of the week. He ate alone and he spent most of his time in his room and along the side of the house. Sakura didn't think that talking to him would change anything. She knew that he was awake when she rushed by his room at night. She knew he was worrying, but doing so in silence. He wanted to help, he wanted to be part of the team, but he couldn't. Watching his teammates hurt and knowing that he couldn't do anything about it was killing him.

Sakura sat down at the table in exhaustion. She had taken on all of the cleaning duties. The house was huge and keeping it clean was more work than initially cleaning it. She would do it for Naruto though. Naruto and Kakashi. Both of them. Kakashi was suffering the brunt of the pain, but Naruto was hurting too. This team's pain was contagious. It spread across them like the warmth of a fire, or the chill of a blizzard. She sighed, another stab of that pain touching her heart. Naruto too. When would it stop?

A knock on the door interrupted her thoughts. "Huh?" Who could possible visit them?

Kakashi beat her to the door. He pulled it open quickly. On the other side Asuma had one hand raised in greeting and the other holding four large white bags and a box. He grinned.

"What's up rebels?"

Kakashi took a few of the bags. "Rebels?"

"Nevermind," he waved off. "So how's the recovery thing going?"

"Getting better all the time."

Sakura would argue, but looking back the nightmares were becoming less extreme, if only slightly.

Asuma started off towards the kitchen, casually filling Kakashi in on the whereabouts of the rest of the gang. Anko was currently helping Ibiki out with new Anbu trainees. Genma was off on a mission. Kurenai was home, working things over with Kakashi's old apartment. Raido was still on a long term mission.

"What about Gai?"

"Oh, well we figured you wouldn't want to see him right now."

"Why?"

"Because you never want to see him?"

"Asuma, seriously."

Asuma sighed. "He's making such a big deal out of all of this. He even changed his orange leg warmers to blue to "mourn" you. He's being freakier than usual. You might have had to fight him off with a stick to get away from all the hugs he was planning to give you."

"Geez, I'm grateful that you were available now."

Asuma rolled his eyes before setting his burdens on the counter. "Here's this weeks food supply," he explained. "That one you've got there is more dog food, just in case."

"Thanks for giving me the heaviest bag," Kakashi complained sarcastically, setting his load next to Asuma's.

Asuma shrugged. "You're not going on constant missions anymore, Kakashi. Any exercise at all should do you some good."

Kakashi glared at him halfheartedly before shaking his head. "What else did you bring?"

Asuma smiled. "You know me so well," he joked as he searched his pockets.

"Ah, found it." He revealed a CD case and handed it to Kakashi. "Hold on to that."

Kakashi frowned at it. "What's this for?"

"That's your favorite CD Kakashi, don't complain so much. You're starting to sound like Shikamaru."

Kakashi sighed and tapped the case against his thigh. "You know there isn't a radio within three miles of here."

"Don't complain."

Kakashi tossed the case onto the countertop, right between the two bags Asuma had sat there. "I'll see you in a week?"

Asuma chuckled sheepishly, like a child who had been caught doing something wrong. "I'm not sure if we'll all make it. It depends on what Tsunade decides to order and who she send on missions. Kurenai will be here though. She wants to see you."

"Hm. Why does she want to come?"

"She wants to make sure you aren't getting in any trouble."

"Overprotective, as usual," he commented, beginning to put up the groceries. "She okay?"

"She's fine," Asuma answered automatically. "She's a few weeks along and she's already fretting over baby names."

"Oh, that's right. How did things settle?"

"You mean did your advice work." It wasn't a question.

"Well?"

"You tell me."

Kakashi laughed. It sounded so pure to Sakura's ears. "You'd think you might learn something after all these years."

"Shut up."

Sakura was slightly confused, but wasn't going to ask what they meant. It wouldn't get her anywhere, even if they _did_ answer. The way they acted around each other, so natural, it fascinated her. She knew that they had known each other for a very long time, long enough for Asuma to have come to play at this house as a child. Perhaps they had grown up as friends close enough to be brothers. It was humorous really, when you thought about it.

"Sakura, could you go find Naruto?" Kakashi asked once he and Asuma were finished. "I

want to tell him something."

"Sure." She got up and exited quickly. She knew exactly where Naruto was. He would be close to the side of the house that was invisible to you from the back steps. By the amount of sunlight she could tell that he would be laying in the grass, his hands behind his head, watching the blue skies fade as the sun set, but not looking in the direction of the sun.

"Naruto!" she called. He looked up at her when she arrived, a blank look in his eyes. "Kakashi-sensei wants you."

"Alright," he sighed as he got up and started walking back towards the door. She stared after him, pained. He had changed so much. Seeing Kakashi like that, knowing that she had lied to him to keep him from knowing, it hurt him. She bit her lip to force back the tears and ran to her room.

Taking out a piece of paper and a pen she began to write:

_Tsunade-shishou,_

_You couldn't have warned me about this? What exactly do those pills do to Kakashi-sensei? Why is he having nightmares? I don't understand. This is wrong. Naruto saw too, a few nights ago. It's really bothering him. I'm so worried. Please explain all of this. Why are those pills hurting Kakashi so much? When will his recuperation be complete?_

_Sincerely,_

_Sakura_

It would be enough for Tsunade. She would understand. She always does.

Sakura shut her eyes and took a deep breath, releasing it slowly. Kurenai would be here in a week or two, and she was sure to bring Tsunade's reply. Just a week. That's all she had to endure. She folded up her note carefully. Biting her lip, she sat there for a few moments in silence. Then she got to her feet, steadying herself with the knowledge that Tsunade would know what to do.

She walked back to the kitchen, but stopped at the sight of light laughter erupting from Naruto. A warmth settled in her then; he was going to be ok. She shook her head slightly, continuing on her way.

Kakashi turned to her, his eye scrunching grin slightly exaggerated. "Hey Sakura."

She smiled her greeting to him before moving to stand in front of Asuma. She held out her thin letter. "Could you give this to Tsunade-shishou? It's kind of important."

Asuma took it from her easily. The moment its light weight was taken from her hand it was like a burden had been lifted from her already burdened shoulders. She wasn't alone anymore.

"Sure Sakura. No problem."

"Oh, I wanna send one too!" Naruto said with more excitement than she had seen in him since his discovery of Kakashi's nightmares. "Wait a sec!"

Kakashi and Asuma laughed at him as he left, but Sakura stared after him fondly, happily. Kakashi saw this and threw his arm around her shoulders; she was past the point of being able to be uncomfortable at contact with him. "Told you he would be alright."

Sakura giggled to herself. "Naruto said that same thing to me about you not too long ago."

"Oh," Kakashi said just to give a response. "I'm glad he's getting better."

"Alright, enough with the sentiment," mumbled Asuma uncomfortably. "What the hell happened to you, Elite Copy Ninja Kakashi?"

The sarcasm and teasing in his voice were free for anyone to hear. He was joking while also asking them to stop. Seeing Kakashi, _the_ Kakashi, being that affectionate was slightly unnerving for some reason. It made him feel like something was going to change, something big, and change had never set well with Asuma. His reaction to his upcoming child was proof of that.

Kakashi grinned but removed his arm, instead shoving his hands deep into his pockets and slouching in his "cool guy" pose. It looked so natural for him, where if anyone else tried it they would most likely be seen as a "wanna-be." Asuma knew from personal experience. Kakashi was just something you couldn't copy.

Suddenly he understood Gai's reasoning; and he took out another cigarette in that same moment.

"Heads up," Kakashi whispered. It sounded like Naruto was on his way back.

"Hey! Here!"

Asuma sighed. How did Kakashi's team keep up so much energy all the time? He was grateful that his own team was a bit more relaxed; it just suited him better. "Yeah, yeah, just give me the note so I can go."

"Whatever," Naruto shrugged as he tossed Asuma the note, folded the same as Sakura's.

A sense of relief washed over him as Asuma caught the note, like a heavy weight had been lifted. "Just make sure she gets it, okay?"

"I got it. Don't worry," was Asuma's relaxed answer, and it soothed Naruto far more than his nights of lying awake listening to Sakura's pattering across the hallway floors as she ran to Kakashi.

"I can think of eight good reasons why I should worry." Still, it felt good tease someone.

"Since when do you think?" Asuma teased back.

"I've had some time to."

Asuma was unsure how to take that. He decided that it was best to wait for further explanation to that statement.

"Alright, I need to get back," he said casually, like he had been dropping by every other day for a month. "Kakashi, come for a walk with me."

Kakashi cast one long glance at his former students before tilting his head and shrugging, following after Asuma accordingly. He left them without further explanation, instead exiting behind his bulky friend. Once outside Kakashi let the warmth of the sun sink into his skin, or what was showing of it. He walked alongside Asuma at a steady pace. "So, what's up?"

"Do they know?" he asked.

"About what?"

"What those pills do to you. About those nightmares." Asuma's voice was almost tight, but still held an airy drawl. It was what made talking to him so easy.

"Yes," Kakashi answered quietly.

"How did they find out?"

"Sakura found out a while back. She's been sitting in the room ever since. Naruto only found out a few nights ago. He walked in."

A moment passed as Asuma thought that over. Kakashi had intentionally left out exactly how Sakura comforted him in the terror filled nights of those nightmares.

Asuma looked up. "Then that's what he meant back there, about having some time to think?"

"Yeah." Naruto had had plenty of time to think.

"And Sakura's been sitting in?"

"She's stubborn and wanted to help. No matter what I said or did she wouldn't give up."

"That sounds like her."

Kakashi sighed. "Of course it sounds like her. She was trained by Tsunade, she _had_ to _learn_ to be stubborn as an ox."

"That's not the only reason. Being on a team with Naruto, Sasuke, and you…the girl had to be tough."

"Anything else you need to know?" Kakashi's voice might have had a tint of impatience to someone else, but Asuma could read Kakashi better than that. There was something hidden that was probably better never discussed in those last lines of their conversation.

"How far along is your recovery?"

"It should be coming to a close pretty soon."

"How soon?" Asuma couldn't help but worry.

"Very."

"It's the roughest time...Kakashi, are you that Sakura should....?"

"She shouldn't. If I had any control over it then neither of them would even be aware of anything. And I know that it's the roughest time. I'm prepared for that. It's just...I don't know how to keep her away when it comes."

This was a problem. Asuma had personally been witness to one of those last few nights of painful recovery once. It was a sight that had disturbed him, but in the end never lessened his respect for Kakashi. Still, it was not something someone who cared about him should see. It was too raw, too harsh. "Have you tried ordering her away?"

"Do you really think that I haven't?" They stopped, standing facing each other at the gate. Kakashi looked down. "There's no way around this, is there?"

Asuma's eyes softened, only enough so that Kakashi could tell. He wished Sakura the best. "I'm really sorry for you buddy."

"We'll get through."

"I know, you always do." It was true, Kakashi always pulled through, no matter what. Not long ago the man standing before him had been in a position that no one ever survives from, let alone heals completely from. A hole in your stomach was something only this man could get through. "So those letters, the ones to Tsunade, they're about you aren't they?"

"Most likely." A vague answer, as always. It held something of a tone that wished that the notes were ones of joy or even bitter sarcasm on the part of sending them here, anything other than the concern that they were no doubt saturated with.

"I won't look at them."

"I know."

Asuma smiled. "Next time I'll bring a radio."

Kakashi chuckled. "Thanks."

"No problem."

Kakashi looked around the wild earth surrounding them, the fresh breeze so much like the smells that he could never forget as the ones he grew up comforted by. "So how's the village doing?"

"The same as usually, except it's missing its best Jounin. Of course, we're managing by taking on a few extra missions here and there. Never noticed how many you actually did until you weren't there to do them anymore. It's crazy. I know that you've only been gone a week or so, but Tsunade's already worried about who will take on the big mission. She's also a little edgy about all of you being out here unprotected and injured, but that's to be expected. It's better that you're closer to the village unguarded than if you were far away from the village with security."

"I agree." He didn't even hesitate with his answer. That was something that Asuma had come to expect from time to time, but not usually about survival or protection. Kakashi almost always obsessed over these things when they in any way involved someone else's safety other than his own.

"You only agree because you like being close to home to protect it."

"Well at least I have a reason."

Asuma grinned, if only because Kakashi wasn't taking much of this seriously. It made it easier to deal with. "Kurenai's not reason enough for me?"

Kakashi laughed quietly. "Sure, for you of course. You've been head over heels for her since we were teenagers."

"You ought to try to fall in love someday, Hatake. I think it'll do you some good."

Kakashi smiled, almost sadly in Asuma's view. "I thought that we established a long time ago that that was impossible."

"You've always managed the impossible my friend, ever since I first met you."

--

That night, as Sakura waited for Kakashi's soft whisper of a cry, she lay staring at her ceiling. The room was dark, save for faint light of her bathroom, and she was able to get lost in her few moments of thought. Naruto was getting better. That was good. It made her happy to know that Naruto would never fail to bounce right back up to any challenge thrown his way. And Kakashi was as good as healed, his nightmares only seeming to become more and more tame.

A hellish scream jerked her out of her thoughts, and also out of her bed. She was tense and ready, as any well-trained konoichi would be, her eyes wide with awareness. The sharp, quick breaths and hushed shocked cries told her where it came from.

"No," she whispered breathlessly. "Not Kakashi."

Naruto was standing dumbfounded in the hallway, looking back and forth from the direction of Kakashi's room to Sakura's door as she swung it open. She barely spared him a glance before rushing past him, pushing herself as fast as she could. Oh, dear God, what was happening?

Kakashi was drenched in sweat when she finally got to him. His shaking was far worse than before, and he had one hand over his mouth to stifle the pitiful whimpers that managed to escape him. The other arm was wrapped around his waist, like he was trying to keep himself from falling apart.

This wasn't Kakashi. This wasn't her sensei. He couldn't be. His suffering before had been nothing like this. He had never looked so _helpless_. For once in her life she felt like he wouldn't ever be able to pull himself back together. He would never be able to stand proud, and tall, and strong ever again. He would never be able to protect them, to lead them.

She reached for him anyway, even as she felt his fear trickling into her. His wide, terrified eyes were so quick as they caught sight of her. His body was so jerky as he flinched away. She wanted to stumble out of the room and hide under her blankets under morning came, and Kakashi would come walking in her room, pealing the covers back and reassuring her that it was all a dream. But she knew she couldn't do that because to do that would be to leave him, and she wasn't capable of that.

"Shh," she whispered, forcing her voice to steady. "I'm here. You're alright. Everything is ok."

His arm twitched as he tried to pull it away from his being to push her away, but his body rippled and his arm only tightened around him. He squeezed his eyes shut as tightly as he could, trying to force everything out. He was too far gone to realize that what was hurting him was coming from the inside.

Sakura wrapped her arms around him gently, pulling him to her. She rested his head on her chest, humming softly because she had learned that it soothed him. She bit her lip to keep from crying, knowing that if he had any of the senses he normally had he could tell that her breath was coming out in trembles. The lump in her throat refused to go away, tightening and tickling until her vision blurred and all she could see was a swarm of fused colors. When that happened she held Kakashi tighter, not daring to let him go lest she cut the last string of strength holding _her_ together.

Memories of Kakashi began to float into her mind. Him ruffling her hair after the team had finished training, him smiling at her comfortingly whenever she was hurt, him standing between her and an enemy as he saved her life over and over. There was nothing that she wouldn't do for him. Holding him this close, being this foundation that kept him from drifting into insanity, made her attached to him in ways she didn't think possible. She would do this for any of her friends, it wasn't as though she wouldn't, but Kakashi's case was different in that she had never seen him as one for needing help. He was always calm, treating everything with a cool, indifferent air. When life was forced to be seen through someone like that, it wasn't what Sakura expected.

She wished that she could be ignorant to everything that had happened to him. She didn't want to know anymore.

Kakashi squirmed and whimpered in her arms, feebly grasping at her shirt. She couldn't stop her tears any longer. They ran down her face freely. She knew that she wouldn't get any sleep tonight, and she also knew that her memories of this night would be blurred by her never-ending supply of tears.

She sat there crying with Kakashi splayed across her lap for what felt like eternity. Her face stung and her eyes pricked harshly. Her own trembling had begun long before, only growing as Kakashi's slowly began to recede.

Her sobs escaped without her fighting them during the long hours after Kakashi had lost consciousness. Her heart beat painfully, each throb causing her face to get wetter. Her will had been beat down by the sight of the strongest man she knew being tortured before her night after night. He was the one no one could scare. He was the one who could have his spine broken and still say that nothing was wrong. The dull image of her trying to piece back together a spine in his broken body sent another cruelly agonizing ache through her chest.

The unfairness of the situation aggravated her to extremes. In all her life she had never met a problem that could never be solved. This time she couldn't do anything, and so she spent the night crying to the past to take back the injuries it had inflicted so easily upon someone so unbeatable and unconquerable. Her efforts were worthless, but she knew that even before the first tear had slid down her soft cheek.

She had finally begun to lose all strength, so purely exhausted that she could no longer work up a sob, when the sky outside began to turn a dull, dark blue. The sun was beginning to rise.

Her head hung limply about her shoulders as she refused to lay down. She stared at Kakashi's masked face, fast asleep across her legs. Hopefully he hadn't seen much of the night either, hadn't heard her pitiful whines. She was reassured that he hadn't seen anything because his eyes had been shut most of the night. Any glimpse he had allowed couldn't have been enough to make him aware that she had actually been crying, because if he had seen then he would have kicked her out of the room faster than Tsunade was capable of in her worst moods.

She heard Kakashi sigh, and though she knew that it meant he was coming to, she relished in the whisper of his voice. He hadn't said a thing the night before, so incapable of doing so. She knew that the wetness around her eyes and on her cheeks wasn't sweat. She hadn't the strength to keep the tears from falling.

With a gulp she pushed the lump as far back down as she could so that she would at least be able to speak to him without immediately giving away her condition. She weekly began to lift her hand, rubbing at her eyes harshly to wake herself up. She had never gone to sleep, but the tiredness it left behind was as bad as being unconscious in the first place.

When she was finally able to lift her head again she began tracing her fingers through Kakashi's hair, pushing away the trembles that threatened to slide down her slender fingers. She sighed, suddenly so happy to have him with her.

"That feels good," he mumbled quietly, his eyes beginning to open. Even as he awoke and knew who she was, he didn't move. He only laid there and allowed the feel of Sakura's cool fingers running through his thin, silver locks to cause him a dulling pleasure. If she kept going then he would go back to sleep so easily that he doubted he would wake up until mid-afternoon. He hadn't gotten much sleep last night, so maybe it wouldn't be a bad thing. "Sakura?"

"Hm?"

He pulled his head away, balancing himself on his elbows that where on either side of her thighs. It was still dark, so he couldn't see much of her face, especially of his current position. "Are you ok?"

For a moment she was struck with worry that he had been talking about her crying senselessly, but then she decided to ignore it. "I'm fine," she lied.

He didn't answer her, but pulled back more to sit up. He crossed his legs and remained motionless in front of her. He took his time studying her face. Sakura was a naturally very pretty girl, her face curved in the most pleasant of ways. As Kakashi's vision began to gain it's usually sharpness, he could see that her eyes were tired and puffy, red rims adding proof that it was crying and not sleep deprivation that was the cause, although the bags under her eyes were a testament to her lack of sleep. Her cheeks were tear-stained and around her eyes a sickening purple. She looked ill. He was overcome with guilt and a desperate need to protect her, even though it was from himself.

"Are you?" she asked flatly, with the faintest hint of worried curiosity.

"Am I what?"

"Are you alright?"

Kakashi felt his shoulders tense in silent anger. The rage building inside him was directed at no one but himself, and he was completely aware of that, but that only made him hate how this was affecting her even more. He sighed, bringing up his hand and tracing the pink lines on her cheeks. "I'm as good as I can be right now."

"You look better."

"And you look horrible."

She shifted her gaze to the lone window, staring off into the dawning forest. "I knew I would," she told him slowly, tiredly. "I thought I had a few more hours though."

"To hide the evidence?"

"Yeah."

Sakura was always honest when she was tired, but only to those she trusted. Thankfully Kakashi was one of them, because he didn't know what he would do right then if he wasn't. "Are you planning on coming back again tonight?"

"Yes," she answered shortly. "Of course I am."

Kakashi gently turned her face back to him. "I'm not going to let you."

She blinked, too exhausted to do anything else. "You don't have a choice."

Kakashi would have growled if she hadn't been such a pathetic sight. It hurt him to see her like that. "We'll see."

She smiled weakly. "No, I'm coming."

Sakura's body fell forward and Kakashi caught her before her head banged against his knee. He rearranged her body so that she was leaning against his chest, his arms wrapped securely around her thin body. "Easy, Sakura. You need to get some sleep."

She shook her head until she was cut off with a yawn. "No, I need to talk to you."

"It can wait. There's no need to do this to yourself."

Sakura let her head roll against his shoulder and it felt so comfortable that she didn't want to move. "Stop it," she said clearly. "If I wasn't this bad off right now you would be yelling at me for staying and crying and not sleeping."

"You're right, of course. I would be scolding you and trying to order you away. I'm still trying to order you away, but it doesn't ever seem to work."

"Why was it that bad last night?"

"Sakura, you should get some sleep."

"I won't let myself sleep until you answer my questions."

"And if I do then you'll let me take care of you?"

His voice was such a wonder to her. His hard body supporting her was so real. She felt comforted and relaxed just knowing that he was with her, so when he asked her if he could take care of her, her automatic answer was, "Yes."

"Good, then ask away."

"Answer my first question."

"It was worse, and is going to stay worse, because my recovery is coming to a close. Next question."

"Why were you screaming?"

"We'll save that one for when you're more awake. Next question."

"That's no fair. The deal was for you to answer me now."

"Sakura, please," he begged. "Later."

She gave in only because his voice begging her reminded her so much of when he was in weaker states. "Fine. Why did you try to push me away?"

"So that I wouldn't wake up with you looking like this. Any more questions?"

"Yeah."

"What?"

"Can I see your face?"

Sakura had asked the question the same as she had asked the other ones, dull but with a touch of ultimate importance. Kakashi was a little surprised that she was even able to think of something like that at a time like this, but wasn't surprised. It was made all the more important to her because of this. She was afraid of losing him while he still had a stranger's face. He chuckled, "Sure."

Sakura gained a little bit more consciousness, unable to believe what she had just heard. "Are you serious?"

Looking up she saw Kakashi's masked smile, "Yep."

Kakashi was delighted at the shine that returned to her eyes, the simile that was threatening to play across her lips. She looked hopeful, happy. He kissed her cheek. "Just as soon as you wake up. And no cheating. If you wake up early then I'm not showing you my face, or answering any of your questions either."

"That's no fair," she objected, though a blush stained her cheeks unnoticeably from his kiss.

"It's perfectly fair. If you're to have what you want, and I'm to have what I want at the same time, then it must all be conducted in a very orderly fashion."

She struggled to keep her eyes open. "Please?"

Kakashi slid from behind her, laying her gently on the pillows. He pulled the blanket over her, and then brushed her hair out of her face. He could see the tears clearly now, their shine becoming more visible because of the rising sun.

"No, Sakura," he said firmly. "Get some rest."

"Stay with me at least?" she asked.

He looked towards the window, the lighting of the sky. When he turned back to her he sighed. "Fine, but just until you go to sleep. I have early training with Naruto today."

With that he climbed back into the bed with her. It surprised him when she cuddled next to him, her face pressed against his chest. His reaction was delayed, but after a moment he laid his arm across her and hugged her to him.

It only took a few moments before she was asleep.

**I hope you enjoyed it. **


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N: I was flipping through the channels and found that nothing good was on, so I started thinking. Well, I realized that this chapter was still sitting in My Documents and that I had yet to upload it. So let's fix that. **

**Send Me An Angel: Chapter 7**

Sakura work up the next morning aware before she was awake. The softness of the bed continued to caress her body gently while the air filled with the fresh, wild smells of the outdoors. When she lazily opened her eyes she could see the dimming light of the sun sliding behind the cover of trees, marking the end of the day. She had slept much longer than she had expected to, but she felt so much better that it didn't even matter.

She was slow to move, savoring the comfortable lull her body had put itself in. It gave her a great sense of relief after a night such as the night before. She believed that if she moved too quickly she would still feel the strain of her muscles as they held her up mercilessly, not allowing her to fall, taste the tears and feel the raw tracks across her cheeks. She didn't want that. She wanted this relaxing glow that had somehow found itself about her.

Kakashi was busy making dinner, rushing from one side of the kitchen to the other. He was missing his headband, flak jacket, shoes, wrappings, and gloves. It gave him a disheveled look that she thought suited him quite nicely. That thought sent her back to another thought, one that had hidden itself in the recesses of her mind.

He had agreed to show her his face.

But why would he do such a thing?

"Good morning, Sakura," Kakashi greeted without looking at her, despite the late time. He was stirring something in a glass bowl when he turned around to face her. He smiled. "You look better, but I think you could still use a shower."

"No kidding," she replied as she fell into a chair that had mysteriously moved from the dining room to leaning against one of the long counters of the kitchen. "I feel great though."

"That's good," he said as he went back to work.

"What are you cooking?" she asked, though she honestly didn't care. Her stomach growled furiously. She would eat anything.

He laughed. "It's nothing you know, but I like it. The only thing that sucks about it is that it takes so long to make. I think you'll enjoy it. You always take pleasure in things that involve other's people's time and labor. It's sort of evil."

"I only take pleasure in it because it's finally not me who's working."

"How cruel."

"Hey, how many times have I cooked for you?"

"Point taken." He sat down the bowl and checked on something in the refrigerator. He shut the door, satisfied, and went back to doing something else at the counter that Sakura decided wasn't worth paying attention to. The sooner she had food in her stomach the better. Her stomach roared again in answer, almost as though agreeing with her.

"When is it going to be done?" she groaned, tipping her head back to lean it against the wall as her tummy betrayed her yet again.

Kakashi smiled. "That's right. You've got to be starving."

She grunted.

"Well, it should take another half an hour. That's why Naruto is still out training. Sorry."

"Can I have something else then?"

Kakashi stepped away from the counter, grabbing a dishcloth that had been laying off to the side. He wiped his hands on it thoroughly as he looked at her. "You don't want to eat this?"

"It's taking too long, and the smell is driving me crazy. If you don't hurry up and get it done or give me something else to eat, I might just start eating whatever it is that's in that damn bowl over there."

He laughed and threw her an apple that had been laying in a basket off to the side. "That should hold you off until dinner."

She caught it and stared at it, then she grunted. "But it's so little."

"No offensive Sakura, but you're little as well."

"Compared to what?"

"To me?"

"You don't eat much anyway," she argued. "How much do you weight? One-twenty?"

"One-seventy."

"You gained weight," she said as she bit into her shiny, deep red apple. The juice rolled down her chin.

"That's what you've got to do when you're preparing for an ambush. Build muscle."

"That sounds like something a kid would say," she commented.

"Well, when you're the main muscle you understand that a kid's mind is far more flexible than that of the wise strategist standing next to him. The strategist thinks objectively. The kid bends around all forces and goes for the straightest blow."

She sighed. "Why does it seem like every conversation with you ends in a lesson about missions or survival? It's ridiculous."

"You try being a shinobi since you were five years old and tell me how _your _head works."

"Odd. You were five? That's weird."

"I expected more of a reaction."

Sakura shrugged. "You're Kakashi, you do things like that. You do things that people don't expect and survive when people expect you to die…even when people already count you as dead. I'm used to amazing things from you. Everyone is by now."

He leaned against the counter, putting his work to the side for a moment. "It sort of takes the glory out of it doesn't it?"

She through the remains of her apple at him with as much strength as she could muster without using chakra, and he caught it swiftly and surely, just as she suspected he would, then she smiled at him. "See? It doesn't take the glory out of anything. I guess the way I see it is that if people already know that you're awesome and all the incredible things you do don't surprise them, then you're finally able to say 'I made it' and mean it."

Kakashi laughed, and Sakura felt a tingle in her heart that momentarily blocked out the hunger that was already beginning to rise again. His eyes claimed hers. "I made it? Sakura, you really are something."

"What? What's so funny?"

He shook his head. "You should already know. I suppose it really shouldn't be funny though."

"What is it?" she demanded.

"I was the only one that made it," he whispered, the sound of his voice traveling more across the air and into a world of magic rather than to her.

She swallowed, pushing back down a lump that she refused to let grow. She was _not_ going to let that ruin her good mood. She had actually woken up feeling _good_, and that was something he wasn't allowed to take from her. "Don't you dare," she growled. "You will _not_ start thinking like that. Right now it's my turn, so shut up and cook."

He looked surprised for a mere second before amusement returned to his eyes and his mouth slid into a wide grin that could be detected even through his mask. "Yes, your highness."

Naruto came in earlier than expected. Kakashi was just finishing putting together the rest of the meal when he arrived. He was fifthly, dirt caked to his clothes, sweat matting the questionably blond hair to his forehead, and soil and blood smeared across his left cheek.

Kakashi's eyebrows raised. "What happened to you?"

"I not sure," came Naruto's quiet, tired answer. "I think I trained too long. I'm exhausted."

Sakura watched as Kakashi's eyes narrowed in spite of the fact that the sight of Naruto should have excited pity instead of whatever glare now marred her sensei's face. Kakashi asked sternly, "Did you go overboard? Did you do anything that would have caused suspicion?"

"I don't think so."

"I don't care what you _think._ I need you to tell me what you _did_."

Naruto's eyelids drooped. "Normal routine. Same stuff I do with you."

"No rasengans?"

"Maybe one," Naruto allowed.

Kakashi growled. "What do you mean 'maybe one'? Are you out of your mind? The Akatsuki are searching for us and you could have possibly just given them an arrow pointing in our direction."

"Sensei," Sakura said gently, "Naruto needs sleep. Let him rest and then we'll get this worked out after he wakes up."

Kakashi shut his eyes and when he opened them Sakura could see that he had regained his calm composure. "No, he needs to eat. Naruto runs on food. He's barely eaten at all today."

Dinner was a quiet, delightful matter. Sakura found that the food was delicious, the meat tender and flavored. Naruto gobbled noisily, the meal giving him energy Sakura thought he had been lacking because of need of rest. She was surprised that Kakashi hadn't demanded that he take a shower first, but Kakashi had left them to go eat outside. Sakura saw through the open door that the fireflies were glowing brightly. She smiled to herself, thinking of the beauty that steamed just beyond the wall that separated them from the outside world.

Naruto said goodnight as soon as he was done and quickly left. She heard the faint hissing of running water and knew that Naruto was off to take that shower he so desperately needed. Sakura carried her plate with her outside.

Kakashi was sitting on the porch, his eyes staring off into the distant forest. He had finished eating, as she had suspected he would have. His dogs were howling. For some reason it wasn't annoying to Sakura, instead it was beautiful. She sat down next to him and resumed eating her own food. Of course, the silence didn't last long.

"Would you like to go for a walk?" Kakashi asked her, giving her an offer that was bound to confuse her in some way. He didn't really care. He needed a break. His own rules had kept him confined to a house that his subconscious held the burden of, and after a few weeks of living there he could feel himself becoming exhausted with the beautifully carved furniture and the luxuries of the house. He felt claustrophobic.

"Uh," Sakura paused. "Okay, I guess." It would be interesting, if nothing else.

Kakashi smiled but looked down at her plate to see what was remaining of her meal. "Would you like to finishing eating or are you already done?"

She shrugged. "I've been done for a while."

Kakashi's hand grabbed hers and pulled her to her feet before she had even realized that she had agreed to go with him. His grin offered her an invitation she couldn't refuse. "Then let's get a move on," he laughed.

He led her through the back yard, passing the shed where his dogs lay lounging across the worn grass around it. Bull, Kakashi's largest dog, gave a ruff bark to his master before again falling silent. Howls went up and Pakkun was elected as the one to go speak to Kakashi. The small, brown pug made his way slowly over to him.

He didn't have a greeting for them. He went straight to the point. "Where are you going?"

Kakashi's hand was still wrapped around Sakura's as they continued to walk towards the dark forest, and Pakkun's eyes strayed towards the entangled limbs before rising to meet Kakashi's. "A walk. It's getting stuffy around here."

Pakkun grunted in response.

"Put up guard," Kakashi ordered. "Regular positions. I won't be here to scout out any intruders, so the job is yours again."

"Ours," Pakkun corrected, referring to his pack.

"Of course," Kakashi said dismissively. "We'll be back soon."

"Tonight's the last night?" Pakkun inquired. He wished to know Kakashi's health status. He had named it an unfortunate quality, but regardless, he was of the canine race, and as such held a loyalty that couldn't be explained.

Kakashi nodded. "Yeah, last night. After this it's done."

Pakkun grunted in satisfaction and trotted off, rejoining his brothers. Finally they could stop their pestering worry. Gossip reigned supreme among the pack, as was expected to happen when dogs were taught how to speak and then left alone for long periods of time. It had become a habit of sorts. According to the rumor, Kakashi and Sakura were growing very close, perhaps too close.

This started a new worry.

Kakashi wasn't like them in that he didn't mate the same way. In fact, Kakashi had never had a litter. Pakkun found it sad, and so this new development was a very welcome one. He had always liked Sakura. This was one way she could officially join the pack.

He spared one last glance to the departing duo before jogging the rest of the way to his waiting family. Whatever happened, Kakashi would be all right.

-

Sakura was surprised to find that the glowing lights of fireflies extended through most of the forest. Bushes and trees were filled with their bright yellow dots, and the only just appearing stars added to that beauty. She was walking with Kakashi down a path that had been reclaimed by the grass and weeds.

"Kakashi?" she asked quietly, not wanting to disrupt the magic surrounding her. It was like she had entered a fairytale, one that she had dreamed of many times as a little girl. The only difference was that she was sharing it with someone other than Sasuke, the most unexpected someone.

"Yes?"

"Can I see your face now?"

She had asked it so quietly and so innocently that for a moment he was thrown off. He stopped walking and turned around to face her where she stood behind him, their hands still connecting them.

"I'm sorry," she said quickly. "I know it's personal and I won't be mad if you don't show me. I'm just curious anyway. I know that you only do that when you trust someone and…"

She trailed off, getting nervous both by how she had begun to ramble and by how he had stepped closer to her, his eyes smoldering as he stared down at her own. In a moment he had ripped his mask from his face, revealing pale, smooth, unblemished cheeks, a straight nose, attractive lips, and a masculine jaw line. The simple curve of his cheek would have been enough to overjoy a painter of the beauties of life. She couldn't help her gasp, the sound breaking through the buzzing of the insect nightlife around them.

"I do trust you, Sakura," he whispered heavily. "I trust you more than I trust anyone."

With that his lips were pressed gently onto hers, and though shock ran though her body Sakura was aware of the way he quickly pulled back. She saw the panic in his eyes and heard the anxiety in his voice. "Sakura, I'm so sorry," he said in a haste. "I didn't mean that."

But she had wanted so badly for him to mean it. She had no idea why, but for that unknown reason she pulled herself closer to him and put her arms around his neck. He was still panicking, though this time not from the fear of guilt, but from the fear of a horrible mistake.

"Kakashi," she whispered, her breath fanning his face, "I don't care."

And so she kissed him back. She had believed that he would push her away, but that belief was quashed when his hands slid across her back and his lips began moving with hers. There was already a foundation between them, one of comfort and loyalty. Neither wanted to think of how this might change their relationship. Neither wanted to know.

But as all great things do, their kiss ended.

"We should get back," Kakashi said, still holding her.

They hadn't really gone for a walk. It was far too short. She could still see the outlines of the house. The only thing that kept her from protesting was the fact that she knew Kakashi was looking for a way to escape whatever it was he had started. He needed to think. So she nodded and followed him home.

Before they reached the house, Pakkun came running to Kakashi. He didn't seem like he had any news that needed concerning, but his words contradicted that. "You have visitors."

"Who?" Kakashi asked in a falsely indifferent tone.

"Your human pack," Pakkun grunted. "They'll be arriving soon."

Sakura was surprised again when Pakkun followed them into the house. It was still an unusual thing for any of the dogs to do.

"How much time?" Kakashi demanded as he began stifling through a drawer in the kitchen counter. He came out with a familiar CD.

"We're out of time," the pug answered.

At that moment a knocked sounded at the door. Sakura could tell from the multiple chakra signatures that their was no doubt a party waiting outside. Before she or Kakashi had a chance to open the door for their guests, the so called guests had it shoved to the side.

Genma was the first to enter, wearing the face of a guy who obviously knew he was in for a good time. Kurenai followed after him, a soft smile on her red lips while one hand rested lightly on her stomach. Asuma came in carrying a radio, just as he had promised, and Anko shut the door behind her. The noise that came with them upset the quiet of the house, the peace that had possessed it.

Kakashi acted very well, as Sakura had always known him able to do. There was no trace of anxiety or worry in his expression. It was as though they had never left the village, as though their lives had never been disrupted. He commented lightly, "I guess next week was out of the question. It's good to see you guys."

Genma grinned and walked over to Kakashi, throwing his arm around his friend's shoulders. "You've got the night, Asuma's got the music, and I've got the booze. Let's get started."

Kakashi laughed. "I think you already have."

Genma left, carrying a bag that Sakura hadn't noticed. The clinking of glass indicated it's contents. She decided it was best ignored.

"Happy early birthday," Kurenai greeted Kakashi, her smile warming. The older woman turned to face Sakura. "I hope it hasn't been too difficult here."

Only every night she had remained in this house. "Not at all," she answered. "It's been fun. I miss home though."

"How about you girls go help Genma in the dining room," Kakashi suggested. "We don't want him getting too wasted."

Kurenai laughed lightheartedly and started for their destination, pulling Sakura along by her arm. Once they were out of sight, her face became more serious. "Sakura," she said, "be honest. I know about the nightmares. We all do."

Sakura looked down, but kept walking with Kurenai's guidance. "If I had said anything it would have ruined everyone's mood. Plus, it might have even embarrassed Kakashi-sensei."

"You still call him sensei?"

"Not often," Sakura admitted, a blush lighting her cheeks. "I don't think he really cares. It would probably make him feel old tonight anyway."

Kurenai's smile returned. "Probably," she agreed. "But I'm not worried about Kakashi. I've known him too long to be worried about him. I'm worried about you."

"Why?"

"Because I've known of a few girls who got confused living with that man."

Sakura struggled to comprehend. "Confused?"

Kurenai stopped before they reached the dining room, keeping them out of Genma's bubble of awareness. "Kakashi isn't…he doesn't mean to, he doesn't, but sometimes girls aren't as careful as they should be. Sometimes they fall for men they shouldn't, and that almost always hurts them."

Something clicked in Sakura's brain, and she was shocked at the implications. "Are you warning me not to fall in love with Kakashi? Seriously?"

She had never thought of it. Kakashi wasn't what someone would consider easy to fall for. Yes, she had recently found out that he could be--if he would remove his mask. Yes, she knew for a fact that he could be charming and admirable, but she had never thought of Kakashi as able to fall or stay in love. He just didn't seem the type, and so she had never considered herself capable of it.

Kurenai remained serious. "Yes, I am. Sakura, I'm going to be honest, so I want you to be."

"All right."

Kurenai took a deep breath and released it slowly. "I want him to fall in love with you, or _someone_. It would help him, and God knows he needs help. When he's around someone he trusts and loves, his nightmares can't harm him nearly as much because he isn't focused on the agony. But I don't want you two to fall for each other because I'm afraid of what it would do to you if that were to happen. I am not worried about Kakashi because I know he'll pull through and get done with the recovery fine, even if it could be easier for him."

"Kurenai-sensei I-"

"But," she continued as though Sakura hadn't spoken, "I can see that you're already beginning to. I want to help my friend, but I won't at the cost of your heart. Do you understand, Sakura? Do you get it?"

Sakura leaned against the wall. "Yes, I do."

She wanted to tell Kurenai about the kiss. She wanted someone to share the experience with, but she was afraid of what words the information would bring forth from those plump, red painted lips.

"Sakura, tell me," Kurenai said. "I can see it in your eyes, and I can tell when Kakashi is hiding something. He may be a damn good actor, but I'm a better critic."

Sakura sighed and crossed her arms over her chest in a defensive posture. "Just before you arrived," she began, "we were in the woods, and he kissed me."

"_He_ kissed you?"

Sakura blushed deeply. "At first. Then he pulled back and apologized, but I…"

"Oh God, this is worse than I thought."

"It was an accident," Sakura said quickly. "It won't happen again."

Kurenai nodded. "Yes, I know."

Sakura took noticed of the way the brunet's hands slid around her stomach, the way they cradled it. For a desperate, fleeting second, she wished that she could have that with Kakashi. She wished to carry his child. But then that yearning was gone with the disappointment and self disgust that came after it. She had just been warned only seconds ago, and here she was wishing for things she could never have. Not only that, but she was repulsed at the thought of letting herself be taken by emotions so clouded that she couldn't see straight.

"C'mon," Kurenai said. "I can already smell Genma drinking."

They turned to enter together, and together discovered the table littered with full bottles of liquor. Genma was sitting at the table, emptying a shot glass of something Sakura couldn't identify. Of course, Sakura didn't drink, so that seemed a pretty good excuse for not knowing.

She felt Kurenai's hand on her arm. She watched as Kurenai's lips formed her sentence. "Whatever happens, I think it will be all right."

Something in Sakura's stomach stopped fluttering and her own anxiety began to ease. Kurenai's opinion was a unique one in any situation, and one to be trusted. Sakura felt confident that that wasn't going to change any time soon.

Still, it had been quite an experience to listen as that opinion flickered through hope, then doubt, and then finally a loss of worry. She knew, though Sakura didn't have time to ask how, that neither her or Kakashi would get hurt.

Sakura sat down next to Kurenai, Genma naturally on the opposite end of the table. He ignored them as they began a impersonal chat.

"Where is Naruto?" Kurenai asked. "Is he coming?"

"I doubt he even knows you're here. He spent the day training, so he's exhausted. I bet he's unconscious by now."

Kurenai laughed easily as the three missing members of the group entered. Asuma sat next to Kurenai, comfortably resting his arm on the back of her chair. Kakashi sat next to Genma, who clearly enjoyed the company. Anko took the empty seat to Sakura's left, a wicked smile pulling at her face.

Music began to blare out from the radio that Asuma had brought, though it wasn't obnoxious music. It just sounded a little old fashioned. But then again, Sakura wasn't really able to care at that point.

Shot glasses made their way to everyone sitting around the table besides Kurenai. No one offered her any, the courtesy of friends treating a pregnant member gently. Sakura pushed her own glass away, not wanting the feeling of the liquid burn as it slid down her throat. Anko and Genma drunk openly and rudely, while Kakashi drunk without notice. Sakura hadn't even been able to tell he had been drinking at all until empty glasses came to a numerous number in front of him.

Sakura joined Kurenai in laughing at their intoxicated friends as they began to sing along loudly to music. Sakura asked, "This is what Kakashi's birthday is like?"

"We like to have fun," Kurenai answered. "It's not everyday we get to force him to celebrate something. His birthday is something we haven't skipped since he left Anbu."

"Why didn't you do it when he was in Anbu?"

"Because he would always take a month long mission for September so that we couldn't."

"Huh," Anko grunted as she stared at Sakura.

Kurenai smiled at her. "Actually, Anko didn't join us those years. She was rather young."

"That's not what I meant," Anko mumbled.

"Then what did you mean?" Kurenai asked, a rare color of curiosity in her voice.

Anko leaned over the table and whispered something in Asuma's ear, just low enough so that Kurenai couldn't hear. When she pulled back, Sakura could see Asuma staring at her with large brown eyes. After a few seconds he said, "Wow, you're right."

Anko grinned. "I know. It's pretty freaky, isn't it?"

Asuma nodded. "Freakiest thing all month."

"What is it?" Genma asked, joining them as his short conversation with Kakashi ended. Asuma did the same thing as Anko had. He whispered the secret in his friend's ear.

Genma had a far different reaction. He laughed. "No kidding. Why didn't we see that before?"

"Because none of us were drunk enough to look before," Anko answered. "It's not something any of us expected from _her_."

"Very true," Asuma said before leaning towards his wife to tell her. The second he pulled back was the second Kurenai's eyes flickered to meet Sakura's. After a moment she gasped, "It can't be."

"Oh, but it is," Anko laughed cruelly.

The matter seemed to have finally found Kakashi's attention. "Okay, what the hell is it?"

Genma smirked as he whispered to Kakashi. Kakashi's reaction was worse than the others. His eyebrows nearly touched his hairline and his mouth was obviously hanging open, though only slightly. He blinked a few times, and then he rested his head on his arms on the table. "How? _How_ did this happen?"

Sakura looked to Kurenai. "Please, tell me."

Kurenai swallowed. "I don't know if I should."

"Oh hell, I'll tell her," Anko offered loudly. "You see, I've noticed a very strange thing that we should have picked up on a very long time ago. You just so happen to match each description of Kakashi's ideal woman."

For a long moment the only sound was the singing and the guitar of the music behind them. Then, "_What_?"

Genma laughed. "Way back when, we were drunk and bored, so we each made a list of the qualities of our 'ideal woman.' Kakashi's was very general, so we made him give more detail. Amazingly, you fit the list."

Sakura ran her hand through her hair, trying to fight off the frustration that confusion always brought on. "Is this some kind of sick joke?"

"No," Kakashi mumbled miserably. "It's not a joke. But I don't see how she fits _every _description. Some, yeah, but not all of it."

Asuma raised his eyebrows. "Is that so?" he challenged.

Kakashi lifted his head to glare at him. "That's right."

Asuma's smile was enough to make Kakashi want to bash his head in, but he restrained himself. Asuma asked, "Genma, what were some of the things in that list exactly? You remember it better than I do."

"Well," Genma thought for a moment. "Huh. Do you want the physical traits first or the personality traits?"

"Let's go with physical."

"Kakashi said that she had to have interesting, pretty eyes. Out of the three of us, I was the only one who didn't say shit about the eyes. Anyway, he said that and that she should be conservative in the way she dressed, but still obviously gorgeous."

"Anything else?"

"Not really. He kept pretty general with the physical traits. She just had to be pretty, which really isn't hard to find where we come from."

Asuma laughed.

"And personality wise?" Anko prompted, her smile never faltering.

"She had to be independent. Kakashi wanted a woman who was capable of stepping up and taking charge, but he also wanted her to be sweet and gracious."

"Wow, Kakashi," Asuma snorted. "I'd forgotten about that."

"Shut up," Kakashi growled. Asuma just continued to laugh at him.

"She also," Genma continued, "had to be able to love completely. Kakashi didn't want a whore who would run around and sleep with every guy he ever worked with. He wanted someone who could be his."

Genma paused, patted his friend on the back, and then laughed. "That was probably the worst interrogation you had ever been put through. To admit something like that!"

Kakashi's glare shifted to burn a penetrating stare at the man in the chair next to him. "And Sakura fits all of that?"

Genma nodded. "Just accept it."

Sakura looked down at her lap, blushing. Was that why he had kissed her? Did she fit his image of the woman he wanted to spend his life with? For some reason that hurt more than it should have. It hurt because she had wanted him to love her because of her, not because of a picture he had painted in his head; and because she knew now when she had decided that it could never happen.

Kurenai leaned over to her. "You know, we've actually been trying to find a girl who fits that description for years. This is just some sort of twisted irony."

"Kakashi-sensei," Sakura said, looking up, "you shouldn't drink anymore. It might mess with your recovery."

Kakashi's glare faltered when he looked at her, if only because he knew it wasn't her fault. "Yeah, you're right."

Asuma smiled widely. "Well, let's not end this night without at least sending Kakashi to bed laughing like an idiot."

Genma cheered, "That's what I'm talking about!"

Asuma turned in his seat to face Sakura. "Sakura, did you ever hear the story of how Kakashi first lost his virginity?"

"No," she answered, blushing deeper, "and I don't think I want to."

Genma laughed. "He lost it before all of us."

Kakashi simply buried his face in his arms again.

"Well," Asuma said, looking her over, "I'm guessing that your pretty little cherry has yet to be popped. Am I right?"

Sakura nodded, a deep inner knowledge knowing that her face was bright red. She was seventeen. It wasn't like she was late or something.

Genma said loudly, "We had all lost it by time we were your age."

Sakura wondered at that, but stopped. If she blushed any harder she would faint, just as she had seen Hinata do a hundred times before.

"To be fair," Anko smiled crookedly, "from what I've heard, Kakashi lost his before anyone else in this room. I just wasn't in this fucked up group when it happened."

"I had taken Genma and Kakashi to a pub for the first time," Asuma recalled. "I wondered off, and when I came back…"

Genma put his arm around Kakashi's shoulders again, "I was passed out and this guy here was getting screwed in a back room."

Kakashi would have gnawed Genma's arm off if he had had the dignity left to lift his head. He felt Genma's body shake as he laughed. "To think that we were only fourteen."

Oh, the arm was coming off. Maybe not tonight, but it sure as hell was coming the fuck off.

He chanced a glance up and saw that Sakura's face was brightly colored, her posture rigid and her hands folded in her lap. He felt bad for her. She was probably almost as embarrassed as he was.

It was time for some payback. Kakashi forced himself to sit up, shoving Genma's arm off with a silent viciousness. He smiled tightly. "What about the story of how I nearly got Kurenai to dump you, but then took pity on your worthless soul and left you keep her? Do you remember that one, Asuma?"

Asuma frowned. "What?"

Oh, it felt so good.

"Oh, nothing, nothing. I guess she never told you." Kakashi turned his gaze to Genma. "Or what about the time one of your balls was accidentally cut off during one of your missions, Genma? That one's hilarious. Maybe we should discuss that instead."

Anko snorted in a very unladylike fashion. "You got one of your balls cut off? That freaking hysterical!"

"And don't you even get me started," Kakashi said, turning now to Anko. "I know for a fact that you've been screwing Ibiki and Ebisu's brains out for three months now. Not exactly the type of men you want people to know about. Especially the way you do it, Anko. A snake pit isn't exactly romantic. Kinky in the creepiest of ways."

Kurenai laughed, an odd sound to be filling such tense air.

Genma grunted. "You aren't going to humiliate her?"

"Of course not," Kakashi replied with a sweet smile. "Kurenai has never done anything mean to me. I'm certainly not the type of man to take vengeance on someone who doesn't deserve it. Besides, I like Kurenai. She's nice. And pregnant."

Sakura giggled in spite of her self. The embarrassment from before had finally ebbed down until it was just a painfully present self consciousness. "Kakashi-sensei, I think it's getting late. You should get to bed."

Kakashi grinned. "Of course. I agree completely."

Sakura nodded, and then stood up to go help him and give him his pill. She paused as she began walking out of the room. Her gaze flickered to Asuma. She asked, "Did Tsunade-shishou reply to my note?"

"Oh, yeah," Asuma mumbled as he began checking his pockets. He finally came up with a folded white sheet of paper. "Here you go."

Sakura grabbed the letter, said goodnight, and then went to join Kakashi. He was just opening his bedroom door when she found him. She bit her lip uncomfortably. "I'm going to go get your pill, and if you don't mind I think it would be best if I just stayed with you tonight. I think it would make things a lot easier."

He nodded. "Go ahead. I'll see you when you get back."

She ran to her room and shut the door behind her. There, she took out the note and slid to the floor, her back pressed against the wall.

_Sakura_

_I'm sorry I was so unable to explain to you what was going to happen. When you receive this note Kakashi's recovery will either be finished with or coming to a close. He suffers from his past, Sakura. It hides in his subconscious and haunts him in his nightmares. I wish I could have better prepared you, but by now you understand. I apologize again, but I knew that you would make it through. I had no doubt of that. _

_I'm proud of you._

_Tsunade_

It wasn't as though she had expected very much, but she had at least expected more than _this_. It told her next to nothing. His nightmares were about his past. She had figured that out on her own. Frustrated, she through the note to the side and quickly retrieved Kakashi's pill. She walked to his room quietly, listening to the noise floating through the house from the dining room. It would be a while before they left, but hopefully they would leave before Kakashi's torment began. It would be awkward if they didn't.

He was laying on top of his blankets when she entered, his hands behind his head under his pillow and his eyes staring at the ceiling.

"Do you need water?" she asked as she stood in the doorway.

He shook his head. "No, it's fine. I can swallow it without it. You can close the door."

She felt slightly uncomfortable, and she was afraid that he could see it, so she sat on the edge of the bed with deliberate indifference. "Here," she said as she handed him the pill.

He toyed with it, moving it between his fingers. "I don't think that was a bad birthday," he mused. "It was pretty funny."

"Yeah, I didn't know that Genma had lost something so precious to him before," she replied.

Kakashi chuckled. "I promised him I wouldn't tell anyone. The little bastard should have remembered that I'm not above breaking a few promises for a little revenge."

Sakura nodded. "It was well deserved. Now, take your pill."

He smiled at her. "I already did."

She checked his hand only to see that the pill was gone. It could have been thrown somewhere, but Kakashi wasn't that stupid. He had simply swallowed it too fast for her to have seen, though she had no idea why it would bother him to show her his face again. She decided not to push it. A lot had happened the last time he had done that.

She sighed and then laid down beside him. Kakashi smiled, "You usually sleep on this side. Would you like me to move?"

"It doesn't matter," she answered, closing her eyes.

"Sakura?"

Something in his voice forced her to look at him. "Yes?"

Only his dark eye was open, but it looked guilty. "I overheard you talking to Kurenai."

Sakura felt her cheeks flush. "That was very rude."

"But Sakura, what if…?"

"What?" she prompted.

Kakashi looked back at the ceiling and spoke slowly, "What if what's going on between us is wrong? What if one of us gets hurt because of it? I can't imagine doing that to you."

"Kakashi, you aren't Sasuke." She looped her fingers through his loosely. "You wouldn't make his mistakes. And I know you could never hurt me."

"But I have already Sakura," he said. "Every night I hurt you."

He was silent. She tightened her grip on his hand. "Does that still bother you?"

He didn't answer.

"Does it?"

"Of course, it does. How could it not?"

Was it possible that the pill had already made him vulnerable? Could that be it? She highly doubted it. Kakashi had a strong system. He wouldn't have been alive at that moment if he didn't.

"Sakura, I've never been in love before," he said suddenly, quietly. "I tried once. I tried to because I did love her, but I wasn't _in _love with her. I couldn't be what she needed."

"Who?" Sakura asked quietly.

"Rin, my old teammate. I guess it shouldn't matter now. She's been dead so long that it shouldn't, but somehow I feel like I can't fall in love. Not ever. That's what Kurenai was warning you against. That's what you should be afraid of."

"But I'm not," she said, shaking her head. "I can't be. I can't be afraid of you. I just can't. I can only be afraid _for_ you. Do you see the difference?"

"This is wrong," he whispered, even as his hand finally tightened around hers.

"Does it feel wrong?"

"No."

He turned his head to look at her. She met his gaze. "Then don't make it."

Kakashi had never wanted her as much as he did then, with her quiet defiance and hypnotizing eyes. Her innocent trust warmed something in him, the same thing her kiss had excited. He turned onto his side, leaning over her slightly. "Do you trust me?"

She nodded. "Of course."

Her voice had never sounded sweeter. He slowly removed his mask, the cloth that always seemed to be separating them. He held his lips a breath away from hers for an agonizing moment and then finally let himself feel the soft flesh of her lips, her inaudible sigh, the tremor that ran through him when she put her arms around his neck and twisted her hands in his hair. It was different than it had been with the other women he had been with, and he suspected it was because he felt something for this one.

He deepened the kiss, biting and tugging on her bottom lip. When his tongue finally slid into her mouth she let out a soft moan. Kakashi knew he was dancing with the forbidden. But was it so forbidden? Did the unwritten rule stand the same for him as it did for everyone else? His name had already rebelled against so many rules. Why not this one?

He twisted himself until he was hovering over her. His hand grabbed the back of her right knee and pulled it up until her leg wound itself around his hip. She was so tender and graceful and soft. He groaned as quietly as he could.

**Probably the most fun thing I've written in this story yet. Also probably a ton of mistakes, but we're not going to pay attention to that. **


	8. Chapter 8

**A/N: Sorry, no lemon. This is rated T for a reason. **

**Send Me An Angel: Chapter 8**

The warm magic that Sakura had fallen into wasn't to be broken. The whishing of the wind outside woke her early that night as it whistled against the outer layer of the house, the sound echoing and surrounding her. Her senses could only read the feeling of the warm sheets against her bare skin, the hard chest pressed against her back, and the muscled arm wrapped around her possessively. Kurenai's warnings hadn't stopped them from doing what they had done last night. Frankly, Kurenai had encouraged it.

Sasuke could never have given her this.

Sakura leaned back against Kakashi's sleeping form. It was so peaceful, so perfect. His nightmares had never come. Perhaps it was because he had been awake during the hours it was scheduled to, or perhaps it was because he had been just absorbed in the happenings as she had been. Maybe they were coming, and just hadn't arrived. Her sigh was drowned out by the booming of an nearby explosion.

Kakashi was awake and hovering over her protectively before she had even had time to realize that the noise had come from multiple paper bombs. She felt dizzy and the loud, continuous booms were only adding to the surreal experience of it. Kakashi held her face between his hands. He told her fiercely, "Get dressed, Sakura. They found us. We're being attacked. I need to go find Naruto."

He left her, grabbing his folded uniform from its resting place on his dresser before he went. Sakura stared after him for a moment before her mind processed what was happening. Her head cleared and she jumped up, tugging on her clothes as she went. She ran down the hallways until she reached her room. Every patter of her feet across the wooden floors had seemed to echo in her mind. She grabbed her weapons, putting them any place that she could hold them.

She held her arms over her face in an attempt to block as an eruption tore away the wall of her room, the fire blasting across her belongings. She used her medical ninjutsu to heal her burns as quickly as they appeared, but the threatening chakra presence behind her did not belong to that of a merciful person. She heard the whoosh of the air as a large, bandage covered sword sliced through it. The last thing Sakura felt was the pain piercing through her skull before she lost consciousness. The last thing she saw was Tsunade's note.

_I'm proud of you. _

_--_

Sakura groaned when she finally began to regain consciousness. The hard, uneven floor beneath her did nothing to help the pounding in her head as each heart beat pumped blood through her skull and caused another aching of pain. The next thing she felt was the biting cold against her bare arms and legs. She shivered, and the movement caused something solid around her right ankle to clank against the floor.

When she gained the courage and strength to open her eyes, she saw through the dim light that she was chained, the metal attached to a rusty, yet sturdy pole running through the small room she was being held in. She forced herself to sit up and lean against the wall, even though she gasped at the pain. After a moment of recovery, she opened her eyes again. She was in a cell, three solid rock walls and one wall made of cage bars. How insulting.

"Don't use your chakra," she heard Kakashi say from the other side of the room. She slid her gaze towards him and was met with disappointment when she saw that he too was chained. And missing his flak jacket.

"Why?" she croaked, her throat scratchy and hoarse.

"They've drugged us pretty bad. If you try using a lot of chakra, you don't know what that chakra will attack. For example, if you try using Tsunade's strength to rip that chain from the wall, then you'll probably just end up breaking your hand."

She sighed, feeling a weight on her shoulders. "And what about my head?"

"I suggest healing it gradually. Only use as much chakra as you would for a paper cut, but keep the chakra flow going until you're healed."

"'Kay," she mumbled as she began focusing her chakra towards her scalp. It was difficult regulating the amount, she was so used to using medical ninjutsu with quick, efficient work. But she could feel the pain when she pushed too hard, so she settled for a thin trail of chakra that would lace up the gash first. She asked grumpily, "Where are we?"

"We're captives," he answered strangely with exhaustion. "From the fact that it hasn't stopped raining since our arrival, I'm sure you can guess which country we're in."

She groaned again. "How long have we been here?"

"You've been out of it for a whole two days."

So, they had been caged and drugged for two days straight. No big deal. They just had to break out and notify the Hokage. But, first thing was first, "Where's Naruto?"

She watched as Kakashi's eyes stared off through the small window on the northern wall, out of ether of their reaches. His voice was returning to normal when he spoke. "Perhaps I should wait to tell you. I don't think right now would be the best of times."

"You can't screw a girl and then keep secrets from her," she joked. "Now, where is he?"

When Kakashi looked at her, she was shocked to see that both of his eyes looked black. His mask was in place, but it barely hid the bruise alongside his cheek or the dried, stained blood that had leaked down across his covered neck. "Sakura, you don't realize the seriousness of the situation."

She stared at him silently, her breath harsh. "What happened to you?"

"I fought back," he said simply.

A sickening worry struck through her, causing her breath to catch in her throat, adding to its dry pain. "Please, Kakashi, I'm awake now. Where is he?"

Kakashi turned his eyes away from her. "They've been removing the Kyuubi from him since we've been here. It's taking them a bit longer than usual with so few members, but even with eight people it still would have taken them three days."

Sakura began to choke, her breathing not cooperating with her body. Kakashi stared down at her from his sitting position on the other side of the room, his back pressed tightly against the wall as his shoulders tensed slightly, and then relaxed. "Sakura, calm down. There is nothing we can do right now, and making yourself sick isn't going to help us."

She bent on her hands and knees, not allowing herself to fall. Her vision blurred with unshed tears. She couldn't stand this. She could _not_ be sitting here doing nothing while Naruto was being killed, she couldn't sit here being helpless. Her voice hitched as she asked, "Kakashi, have you ever felt so weak that you wanted to cry because of just how pathetic and disgusted you felt?"

"No."

His answer was short and cold. She nodded as she swallowed her sobs. "Why not?"

She heard his bitterness in his answer. "Because I would not allow it. I _could_ not allow it."

"Why? Doesn't everyone need to feel weakness at some point in their lives?"

Kakashi bit his lip. "I wasn't allowed to feel weakness. Weakness kills you--that's what they said. That's what they pounded into me everyday of my childhood."

"And now you can't feel it?"

"No," he whispered. "Now I become hard and cold and cruel when I feel it because I know that it does kill you. It killed my father, and my best friend. My mother. My teacher. My comrades. All of them. I won't let it kill you, too."

Sakura's arm gave out from underneath her. Her jaw hardened as she rested her forehead against the rough stone of the floor. "It didn't kill them," she said shakily. "Love did."

Kakashi put his head between his knees. He spoke slowly, incredulously. "In the shinobi rules, love _is_ weakness, Sakura. It's a weakness that betrays you and haunts you, and one that I have felt far too many times to be able to resist."

Sakura whimpered quietly as she began to pull herself back up. Kakashi's voice stopped her. "Don't," he said. "Just lay down and rest for a while. Give your body time to heal."

Sakura paused, holding herself up as much as she could with unsteady arms. "But isn't that what you hate? Isn't that weakness?"

"No, that's strength."

"How?" she begged. "How is it strength? I feel so weak."

Kakashi looked at her with the most unfathomable expression. "Because you are my strength. Because, in the end, you're weakness always becomes your strength."

Sakura fell, and as she did the blackness overcame her again.

--

The steady dripping of water from the hidden leak was driving Sakura insane. Kakashi's never-ending silence did nothing to help. The lightening of the sky only showed them that the third day had begun, that their time was limited. Sakura pressed her face into her hands and groaned.

Kakashi finally turned his head to look at her. "What is it?"

"Say something, please. I can't take it anymore. Distract me."

"It won't change anything," he told her.

"Yes, but it might help us put our heads back on straight."

"All right," he said as he shifted his sitting position. "What do you propose we talk about? Last night? It was wonderful. Sucks that it was ruined, but the night itself was great."

She frowned. "You're not helping. You aren't even trying."

He tilted his head back and rested it on the dirty wall. "Some people won't suffer in silence because that would take the pleasure out of it."

"Quotes?" she asked. "Seriously?"

"Yep."

She glared at him and said bitingly, "If there's a substitute for brains, it has to be silence."

She could see the hint of a smile behind Kakashi's dark mask. He said much more lightly, "If you rest your chin in your hands when you think, it will keep your mouth shut so you won't disturb yourself."

Sakura giggled. "Are you mocking me?"

"A little," he admitted.

She paused. "It is better to be silent and be considered a fool than to speak and remove all doubt."

"That's a pretty famous one," Kakashi commented. "Have you ever heard this one? 'Discretion is putting two and two together and keeping your mouth shut'?"

"No, I haven't."

"I'm surprised."

"You're rude."

"Not often."

"Often enough."

"Perhaps. But it's your turn, so give me a quote."

She thought for a moment. "The primary condition for being sincere is the same as for being humble: not to boast about it, and probably not even to be aware of it."

Kakashi chuckled. "How is that, in any way, relevant to our situation?"

Sakura shrugged. "I didn't know it had to be relevant."

"The whole silence quotes conversation wasn't a hint?"

"It was supposed to be?"

He laughed. "Sincerity needs no witnesses," he answered.

She smiled, and replied, "I should say sincerity, a deep, great genuine sincerity, is the characteristic of all men in any way heroic."

"That hurts, Sakura, really."

"You aren't sincere?"

"I'm paid to lie. It's what I do."

"Ah, right, you're a shinobi. I forget that because I'm in the same profession."

"How nice. We share something in common."

"Shut up," she snapped playfully. "It's your turn."

He lifted his head, and Sakura could see his smile clearly. "If you must kill time, work it to death."

She grinned, saying, "He who kills time injures eternity."

"That one was unfair," he complained. "Besides, I'm out of time quotes."

"Then just come up with something else," she said.

"Ok." He said with a sigh, "The arm of the law needs a little more muscle."

"We need tougher child abuse laws," Sakura agreed. "Parents have taken enough abuse from their children."

"That one is so funny that I'm going to ignore the fact that you said a quote that has nothing to do with anything relating to us. Again."

"Thank you."

Kakashi grinned, snickering, "Hangover: the moaning after the night before."

Sakura gaped. "That can't be a quote!"

"It is," he laughed.

"Men are disgusting."

"Is so different from my situation with us?"

Sakura opened her mouth to object, and then quickly shut it. "To battle alcoholism is simple. Never take the drink just before the second one."

"I think I'm enjoying this topic," Kakashi commented.

"Boozers are losers," Sakura mumbled.

"That's no fair, Sakura. You gave two quotes."

"You can repay me."

He raised his eyebrows. "Quote one: When a man drinks too much liquor, he can approach you from several directions at once. Quote two: One reason I don't drink is that I want to know when I'm having a good time."

Sakura shook her head. "You do drink, Kakashi."

"Never enough to forget the night before," he said with a wicked smile.

"You're impossible."

His smile turned oddly tender. "I don't think I'm so impossible. I held up my end - you were distracted."

Sakura was suddenly reminded of the horridness of their predicament. "What are we going to do?"

Kakashi grinned at her. "When love and skill work together, expect a masterpiece."

Sakura glared at him. "Enough with the quotes. Kakashi, we need to make a plan."

His grin faded and his face turned serious, but it also turned away from her. "What do you expect me do to? I'm not the hero you think I am."

She was surprised by the hurt that flooded through her, and the guilt. He had been trying, trying as much as he could. He had played and toyed with her to make her feel better, safer somehow. But she denied them both that, even when they needed it. She said softly, "He gave her a look that you could have poured on a waffle."

So sweet were the stares he had looked at her with.

He didn't answer her.

She whispered to herself, "Love without return is like a question without an answer."

"Do you want my answer?" he asked her.

Sakura looked at him with surprised eyes. "You heard that?"

"Do you want my answer?" he repeated.

She swallowed, nodding.

He recited another quote. "Love is a fabric that never fades, no matter how often it is washed in the waters of adversity and grief."

She had a small intake of breath after a moment of breathless joy. He turned his gaze back to her, with the same depth that she remained unable to describe. "I promise, I'll be there for you as long as you want me to be. All right, Sakura?"

She didn't answer, unable to.

Kakashi looked out the window. "Can I use a quote from a song?"

"Yes," she granted him, confused.

"For all the words I didn't say, and all the things I didn't do, tonight I'm gonna find a way."

--

A loud ringing clank against metal caused Sakura to jump. A bloodcurdling laughter floated in through the cave-like walls, so familiar. Kisame. The demon had returned.

His pale blue skin soon became visible, along with the glinting of his razor sharp teeth. His lips were pulled back in the most sadistic of grins, his eyes dancing as he met her defiant gaze. He laughed at her, and her reaction was a painful stiffening of muscle and a feeling of tight, stretched bone as she clenched her jaw as hard as she could. Still he came in high spirits, still he came mockingly.

She glanced at her companion, but her breath caught in a moment of fear as she looked in to his hateful expression. His eyes seemed darker than possible, his rage so palpable that it choked her, made the room stifling. His face was the only thing that indicated his acknowledgement of their new arrival - the rest of his body was relaxed, in the same position it had been for hours. The air seemed to tremble, as though it wished to run.

Kisame's voice displayed no reaction other than amusement. He grinned at her. "It's time for you to go. Can't have you both sitting here plotting with the big event coming up."

Her throat tightened even more. It felt as though she couldn't breathe. They should have been plotting this entire time. They might have been free at this point it they had, but they hadn't. They had sat in silence for hours on end. There was so little communication between them that it wouldn't have mattered if they had been held in separate cells in the first place. The only useful thing Kakashi had said to her was the first sentence he spoke when she woke up, but that was all. Everything seemed so hopeless.

She waved her arms against Kisame, trying to push him back, as he came with a syringe. She was afraid to use her chakra, knowing what it would do to her. She felt the prick as the needle punctured her skin and the cool liquid as she was injected. She became lightheaded, confused. She kept her eyes open even as her body fell to the ground, as she was picked up by the bastard who she wished more than anyone to kill.

She could feel the shake of his body as he laughed, and in response she tried to use her burning hate to cause herself to vomit, but she had no control, and no food in her stomach. She was overcome with a desperateness, and yearning so strong she whimpered against its craving. She wanted Kakashi, to be in his arms, to be safe.

"Would you like to hear a quote?" she heard his wonderful voice growl.

"You've lost your mind, Hatake. I can't believe it."

"It's an interesting one," Kakashi continued. "The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy."

The pause was unendurable to Sakura's ears.

She could hear the threatening humor in the tone of Kakashi's voice when he spoke. "We'll see where you stand when I get to you."

--

Wild with rising panic and rage, Kakashi sought to find a plan, an escape. Sakura was somewhere here, more than likely being hurt, and Naruto was in the process of being killed. He had failed one student already, watched as his Uchiha protégé changed sides and fought against his comrades, but failing all of them was unthinkable. It was too painful. He already had too many regrets to allow this one.

There was one guaranteed plan of success, though it involved a jutsu that Kakashi despised. His father's teaching. The jutsu that gave another being your body to fight with, your battle to win. Was he desperate enough to use it?

He stood up and walked as far as his chain would allow. With his arm extended the bars of the cage were still feet away from him. The answer was that yes, he was that desperate. Muttering a curse under his breath, Kakashi spread a slow, burning chakra through his chest. It wasn't enough to aggravate the drug in his system, though even it was there was no place in his body that the chakra would be unable to overtake. He quickly shoved his mask down, trying to make the transformation as easy as possible.

Kakashi felt the pain as his jaw snapped. He felt the strain as his teeth pulled into tight points, fangs. A deathly growl escaped his roughening throat. His vision turned red and his mind receded as the beast took over. Damn him.

Kakashi watched as his control slipped and was given to someone else. He saw his hands, now with long nails and stiff fingers, rip at the metal bars of his prison viciously, savagely, the chain around his ankle ripped from the wall. His lungs expanded in an effort to steady his breath as the beast continued to scream out against his will. The screech of the iron bending and being torn rang through the caves, echoing back against him, taunting him.

He could see Kisame on the other side, his eyes wide with shock but his mouth curving into a fiendish grin. A mocking grin. Sakura was not with him. Kakashi's vision blurred with bright colors as his body sped forward with intent, a craving of bloodlust strong enough that it shook his hands guiding him. Kakashi recoiled in disgust, trying not to pay attention to the howls of pain or the ripping of flesh or the sound of blood splattering and spilling. His disgust only grew when he found that he was not disgusted with the blood staining his hands, but he was excited and even satisfied by it.

They were paying.

"_Do you see?"_ the beast growled to him. Its predatory smile spread across his face as it raced down the dimly lit cave, a howling laughter erupting in a voice that brought only slaughter and fear. With the canine beast's life sharing his body, the scent of his prey was strong in his exposed nose, as well as the scent of the blood sprayed across his lips, lips that were pulled back in a grinning snarl.

He found them, and it was at that moment that Kakashi felt his rage and jealousy overtake him. It was for this reason that he hated his forbidden jutsu: it stole from him the pleasure of feeling the kill of his enemy beneath his fingertips, under his power. It was a sick pleasure, and one that he was only reluctant to give up when the kill was personal and the need for blood festering strongly.

But he would surrender that pleasure for the lives of his students, the lives of his family.

Konan was the only one in the room, a room with walls covered in chakra ridden paper. He could feel the defensive energy, and could see it while looking through the beast's eyes, eyes that thirsted for the sight of shredded female flesh.

Thankfully, though Sakura was in the room, she was unconscious, injured but unconscious nonetheless. She wouldn't have to see him like this. She wouldn't have to see his teeth gleaming in sadistic pleasure, or his hands ripping through Konan's chest, or the bright red sight of blood spraying across everything in the room, including her own being. She would never have been able to look at him again if she did.

"_What do you think you're doing?_" the beast demanded of Konan, looking over the half naked body of Kakashi's precious person, a feeling of protective rage searing through him. Kakashi was taken aback by the unpredictably genuine feeling of a want to dish out _justice _coming from the beast. It seemed that the more time the beast remained in him, the more of Kakashi that tainted him.

"I'm working," Konan answered coldly, papers beginning to circle them, seeming to dance in the air. "I suggest you stop. Your death will already be excruciatingly painful. If you keep going, then you will be made to suffer through it for much longer than necessary."

Kakashi was pleased with the defying grin that marred his face. _"I'm going to kick your ass before you can even try, bitch." _He also found himself wondering who had said those words, him or the monster possessing him?

Konan's eyes narrowed. "Are you Kakashi?"

"_No, I'm his kitten. What do you think?_

"Sarcasm will not help you here," she warned.

His body snickered. _"Sarcasm? Lady, my sarcasm should be the least of your worries."_

"Why?" she asked. "Is it because your body has nonhuman characteristics? Or because your voice echoes with your growling hate? Because the white of your eyes is tainted red?"

"_No, because I'm going to kill you." _

How pleasurable it was to see the blood he craved.

When she was dead, and the sticky redness coated him, the beast paused, unsure of what to do with the pink haired student of his host. Stop, Kakashi told him. Grab her, run for the rest of the Akatsuki. When they're dead, get Naruto.

"_Why don't I just leave her here? She'll only be deadweight."_

You won't leave her because you love her.

"_I don't love her, _you_ do. Don't confuse us."_

But even as the beast said that, he gently lifted the sleeping girl from the hard, cold table she had been placed on. And he ran.

--

It was barely ten minutes later when the true war began. The shaking wall had rock and dust falling overhead, the rumble singing in his ears. Naruto's body had fallen to the earth, and though alive he was barely breathing. Sakura remained at the entrance to the room of chaos, not completely safe from the battle raging inside.

The beast knelt over Naruto, crouching low and hovering to protect the boy from the blast of chakra and the onslaught of varying weapons. That was not to say he wasn't enjoying it. He was having a damned good time. But Kakashi wasn't. Kakashi's nerves were reaching their limit, draining him with the worry and doubt and fear that didn't usually plague him. His body was so unused to the physical reactions to these emotions that it troubled the beast, annoyed him.

Dragging Naruto's body quickly from a shot that would have killed him and then leaping back in time to avoid a damaging attack, the beast grinned mockingly. How pathetic these humans were.

An explosion to his left shattered his amused expression, repainting it with a look of absolute dread. The explosion had been very close to the entrance, and the smoke fogged his keen vision and made distinguishing smells nearly impossible. The rest of the possibility of identifying Sakura's blood was drowned by the fact that blood already spilt still stung his nose. He couldn't tell if she had been killed.

Kakashi and his imprisoner were for once on the exact same page as they raced through the clouds of dust. Kakashi felt his control slipping back into his limbs as they ran, the beast fading as they reached their destination. Sakura's body lay slumped, but she had no new wounds. The beast - no, the wolf - sighed, _"Thank goodness," _before he finally disappeared.

Kakashi's awareness startled him as be bent low, his hands sliding under Sakura's body and lifting her with little effort. The presence of the wolf had washed the drugs out of his body, enabling him to move freely, but his chakra was still drained. He turned and stared out at the roaring and searing before him, the lighting changing and flickering as bombs continued to go off.

Life. Such a simple, accepted thing. Some see it as a race for survival, others as a chase towards distant dreams, and some as a quest to find the meaning of their existence. He couldn't see himself believing any of them. Life was there so that you understood good and evil, desire and duty, loyalty and betrayal, and all the things that you learned through contact and contact alone. An overwhelming burden that offered you the most precious of gifts. How ironic.

Even more ironic was the fact that more often than not, those gifts were almost certainly taken away.

A pink haired girl lying unconscious in his arms was a gift. A blond boy dying somewhere just out of his sight was a gift. The girl was here, with him, and though not safe was at least not in immediate danger. The boy was becoming more and more of a lost cause by the second. So sad, but so much more infuriating. An anger swelled in the pit of his stomach, in the pit of his heart, and he fought to control it.

He stepped out, breaking into a heart pounding chase after the missing piece of his loud, crazy, unpredictable, danger attractive team, knowing he had little to no possibility of saving everyone.

When he reached Naruto he squatted low, Sakura still in his arms, his nose burning with the coldness of the air. What to do next? He didn't have enough chakra for a proper clone. Even if he did use his remaining energy to create one, he would just die, and where would that leave his young, broken team?

A closer explosion stopped his thoughts, as did the cool chakra signature of someone Kakashi hadn't noticed before. A dark haired young man stood slowly, appearing out from behind the smoke. His onyx eyes turned a deep red, what looked like three hooked spheres spinning around his black pupils. Kakashi whispered in disbelief, "Sasuke."

"It's been a long time, Kakashi," Sasuke said with a smile, though it didn't touch his eyes. "I've been waiting for the Akatsuki to catch Naruto for a while, and now look what happens."

Kakashi stood rooted, his muscles tight.

"What are you doing?" Sasuke asked.

He answered firmly. "Leaving. Now get out of my way."

"I never meant to stand in it," the Uchiha replied. "I'm here to fight for you, Kakashi. Now go, quickly."

Kakashi tensed. "Why are you doing this?"

"Because I'm not hunting my own, I'm killing _them_."

Kakashi stared, shocked silent. "They are your own, aren't they?"

"My past is dead, Kakashi," Sasuke said emotionlessly. "They mean nothing to me, but my future was always in Konoha, so you do mean something."

"You'll risk you're life for this?"

A small, sincere but ironic smile appeared on Sasuke's face. "I've been risking my life since I was born into this world. This fight isn't going to make much of a difference to that."

Kakashi nodded once. He glanced down at Naruto. Now one question remained, what to do? He couldn't ask Sasuke for help. Putting his own feelings aside, Sasuke would need all of his energy for his fight. Kakashi glared at the ground, the swirling of the dust.

"Leave him," Sasuke ordered indifferently.

Kakashi demanded a sharp, "What?"

"I'll get him back to the village," Sasuke promised. Behind him another explosion shook the walls. He yelled, "Now go!"

With a tight throat, Kakashi gripped Sakura's limp body firmly and leapt, running as quickly as he could towards the smell of cool wind, of wild shrubs, and of icy rain.

Reaching it was the personal miracle of his lifetime.

He was right of course. When he exited the horrid place, the cold water poured mercilessly down upon him. Where his skin was bare, stabs of pain touched. It soaked his clothes, and soon he was shivering despite himself. It must have been worse for Sakura. She was barely clad in any clothing. But lucky for her, she was also unconscious.

He ran as long as he could while feeling that Sakura was safe in the weather. He stopped when that feeling left him. Finding a tree that offered a little coverage, Kakashi leaned against it and panted. After a moment he looked down at Sakura. His breath caught. Her lips were going from purple to blue.

He glanced around frantically. Biting his lip, he took a deep breath. He had been here before. There was an unusually large tree that served as more of a cave. It's inside had rotted out. It was a miracle that the wood was still perfectly good. It held out wonderfully against the rain.

Another quick glance and he started off in its direction. It would serve well enough for a few hours, just until the rain let up.

A small break in the trees alerted him to the arrival of his destination. The bark was wet, and so it appeared black. Such a thing would have appeared eerie normally, but at the moment it seemed perfect, or as perfect as an escapee could hope for during a storm in Rain country. Kakashi stumbled in, his arms going numb.

His legs gave out as soon as he reached cover. Sakura fell into his lap, and for the first time Kakashi was aware of how chilled her body was. He scoot Sakura over to the side, against the wall, and then started stripping off his shirt. As wet as it was, it could possibly still be useful. He twisted it to make the water drip out, using as much force as he could without ripping the fabric.

When he was finally satisfied, he looked it over. It was nearly dry. Nearly. Kakashi sighed, preparing himself. He sat the shirt on the ground and placed both hands on it. After a few minutes of concentrating, he used a portion of his remaining chakra to suck all rest of the liquid out. It was finally dry. Kakashi sighed again, this time in relief.

He shifted Sakura until he could slip the shirt over her head. The wind bit at the skin across his back as he tucked the shirt around her.

"That should hold you for a minute," Kakashi whispered to himself as he forced himself to stand up.

He grunted as he confronted the cold and the bitter rain shirtless. The hell I go through for that girl, he thought. Something suddenly clicked in his brain. He was weaponless. He hadn't gotten their tools back from those bastards, and he sure as hell wasn't going to be waiting on Sasuke.

That brought back a wave of guilt. He had left. It was such a pointless, idiotic thing to do. He shook his head against it. He couldn't waste time second-guessing himself. Not now. Not here. He found a few broken branches that had plenty of leaves. Fresh. He picked them up and carried them back, crawling into the cave of the tree and using the branches as a door to block out some of the storm.

The rain was still pouring down when Kakashi decided it was time to leave. Waiting any longer would be dangerous as they were still painfully close to the Akatsuki. He had no way of knowing if Sasuke had finished them off, and to be honest he felt better not knowing. The more likely outcome was that Naruto and Sasuke were both now dead. The Akatsuki had what they wanted. They were now all-powerful.

Kakashi was overcome with a guilt born from his own selfishness. He couldn't stop himself from thinking about it this time. He had risked everything for Sakura's safety, absolutely everything. And now all he could do was pray that by some miracle his other two students had survived, however unlikely that was.

"Stupid," he muttered. He had wasted his love, his home, his life. And he had forfeited his chance to protect them when he had traded his competence for Sakura. But it didn't _feel _wrong. He knew that even now he wouldn't change his actions. If anything he would have done it again.

"Damn it all," he growled, running his fingers through his hair in frustration. He _should_ have taken Naruto. That was the smart thing to do. That was the rational thing to do.

But _he _couldn't have handled it. Not knowing whether or not Sakura was alive or dead, not being able to touch her and keep her safe…His mind made the image so vivid it was almost too much to bear. He turned his eyes back to her and sighed. There was no way to fix this, and he had to stop beating himself up for it or he wouldn't be able to plan right. He had to stop being clumsy.

He stood up, rolling his shoulders and sketching. There was a town a few miles away, Sakura couldn't weigh more than 115 pounds, and the storm - he glanced at it - was settling into a drizzle.

Kakashi knelt down and wrapped his arms around a still unconscious Sakura. He paused. The sight of her after his earlier thoughts had his knees shaking. He forced them to stop and picked her up easily.

--

The prickling along her skin woke Sakura from her sleep. The overdose of drugs was taking its toll if she was too weak to gain full consciousness. Her breathing came harder and faster as she focused on flushing her system clean.

"Easy," Kakashi's voice warned her gently, comfortingly. "It's all right. We're safe."

Safe…Sakura's throat tightened. It felt swollen. She coughed in the attempt to rid herself of it.

She opened her eyes, and in that moment everything came crashing down. She heard the rain beating against a tin roof, the wind whistling and dancing outside, her hitched breath, the slow rippling of the thunder in the background. She saw the grey and dulled blue of the earth, the darkness of the small raggedly built storage shed that she and Kakashi held cover under. She felt the bed of hay beneath her.

"What happened?" she rasped.

She heard Kakashi's sheepish, relieved laugh, but was disappointed to find that she didn't yet possess the strength to turn her head to see the smile that accompanied it. Sakura was floored by the thankfulness that dropped her stomach when Kakashi lay next to her, coming into her line of vision.

He wasn't wearing his mask, she noticed. After a moment of staring at his exposed face, she realized that _she_ was wearing his mask. So that was why it had been so hard to breath…

"Take it off," she ordered, still unable to move.

"Take what off? I'm only wearing my pants."

As wonderful as that idea was, she frowned. "The mask, you fool."

Kakashi chuckled lightly, but Sakura was still aware of the relief in his voice. "Was I that bad?" she asked as he pulled the mask down and tucked it under her chin.

A blinding flash of lightening and an echoing roar of thunder interrupted them. Kakashi ignored it. "You were pretty bad off," he told her.

"What happened?" she asked again.

"I escaped, found you, and ran into Sasuke," he answered, deciding to spare her the details of exactly _how_ that had happened. He continued, "Sasuke's going to bring Naruto back to the village. He's meeting us there."

"Sasuke's coming back?"

Kakashi nodded. He knew that Sakura's thoughts were more near relationships than the possibility of Sasuke and Naruto's survival. He decided not to burden her with that 'if'.

"And…us?" she asked with a soft blush.

"Elaborate."

She took a moment to form her question. "I…want to know if…I was just a fling or if…?"

Kakashi smiled, grateful for the distraction. "Can I ask _you_ something, Sakura?"

Her eyebrows turned up in worried lines. "Yeah?"

"What do you want it to be?" His voice was husky and sweet. Sakura wondered if he noticed how she melted into it.

"I…I want it to be real."

He smiled. "Then it is."

As if that settled everything, he leaned forward and kissed her lightly. She asked in confusion, "That's it?"

His smile quickly turned into a grin. "Yep."

"Well," she said in a huff. "I guess--"

"I guess we should get started now," he interrupted.

She frowned. "Stop being perverted."

His eyes became unbearable. Sakura shifted her gaze away. How was she ever supposed to think straight when he looked at her like that?

Kakashi's warm fingers tracing her jaw line forced her eyes back to him in surprise. He was closer now, his voice again teasing her sanity. "That's not what I mean."

"Care to explain?"

His eyes traveled down to her lips. For a moment he looked uncomfortable, unsure. It passed, overshadowed by the raw confidence of Kakashi's that Sakura loved. "I meant that…Sakura, I couldn't leave you. I should have taken Naruto instead, but I just couldn't leave you behind. It hurt and…it scared me."

Sakura's lips parted slightly in silent shock. Had he just admitted to having a moment of weakness that his shinobi training did not prevent? To think of how harsh he must have been when he had scolded himself…

His sad smile took her breath away. He was beautiful. "Sakura, we should start with me tell you the truth."

It took her longer than it should have to find her voice. "What is the truth, exactly?"

"I love you." Finally, he found himself capable of saying the words that had been caught on his tongue.

**Kind of rough. Not sure if I can write action **_**at all**_**, but I'm sure you got the point. I think there will only be two or three more chapters. And I apologize for making this so…gooey. I wasn't really thinking about this when I wrote it. All I had was a basis of what I wanted for the story. I hadn't planned anything else, so this is being revealed to me as I write it. **

**I hoped you've enjoyed it so far regardless. **

**Also, Disclaimer: I own none of the quotes. That's why they're are called quotes. The song quote is Bon Jovi's. Yes, I am a Bon Jovi fan. I admit that. But the quote fit, didn't it? **


	9. Chapter 9

**A/N: Because I really liked the quote. **

**Send Me An Angel: Chapter 9**

Sakura's throat was so tight she momentarily stopped breathing. In that second she felt the sharp prick of the hay under her, the slight chill of the air, and, most noticeably, the heat radiating from Kakashi's body. She heard the patter of the rain, the soft rumbling of the continuous thunder, and her breath as it finally left her chest.

Kakashi swallowed, waiting. He hadn't expected that. He had pretty much told her he loved her already, before this, so why was her reaction so strong? He agreed that it was important that he said the actual words, but he hadn't known it would mean so much to her, that it would effect her like this. Doubt flooded his mind for an instant

Her body relaxed and she looked down. A slow, soft smile spread across her pink lips. Kakashi's doubt lessened, but still he waited.

"Was it so important to you…to get that off your chest?" she asked in a steady whisper.

"I…" His paused ended. "Yeah, it was."

She closed her eyes, her smile remaining. "Then I think it would only be fair to you…if I told you how I felt."

"And?"

Sakura opened her emerald green eyes and tilted her head. She was regaining her strength. "You're worried about Sasuke, aren't you?" she asked. "Well, I guess I'm just assuming, but still…you should know that I _am_ over him. I'm fine. It won't matter that he came back. I'll be happy to have my friend again, but he doesn't have my heart anymore. He won't…can't break it again."

Kakashi smiled. He was proud of her, and also filled with a triumphant joy. She could be his. That's all that mattered. He raised his hand and ran his fingers along the length of her jaw line, and then cupped her face and leaned in to kiss her. She met him as soon as her body allowed her to. It was short, and he pulled back quickly, leaning his forehead against hers. His mitch-matched eyes remained closed.

"Kakashi?"

He grinned.

Sakura kissed him again. "What's with you?"

"Nothing," he answered. "I'm perfectly fine. Better than fine."

She nodded slightly. "Good."

He looked at her, at the set of her lips. "You're worried, aren't you?"

"What will the villagers think?" she mumbled. "What will Tsunade think, or my parents, or our friends?"

"_My_ friends won't care much," he told her. "Or they will, but it won't be disapproval. The times have changed, and every one knows that. People see relationships much more strange than ours' and much more often. Your friends…will get over it. I've seen Ino flirting with Genma, so this can't be too bad. And Tsunade…well, I'll take whatever she throws at us."

"And my parents?" Sakura asked quietly.

Kakashi's mouth twitched. "I wish I could be of more help with that."

Sakura sighed, and, finding that she could move, buried her face in his chest. "This is just _great_."

Kakashi wrapped his arms around her securely. "Well, think about it this way. Your father respects me…or should. And your mother has always found me charming. From what I've seen, your mother runs that house more so than your father, so if you get to her first, you have a shot at a blessing. Approval would more or less be guaranteed."

Sakura laughed softly. "Mom likes you."

"That's good."

"No, I mean she _likes_ you."

There was a short silence. "Oh."

Sakura giggled again.

"Can you…use that to your advantage?" Kakashi asked.

She nodded. "Probably."

"Well, then it really is good."

A minute passed, silent apart from the storm. Kakashi's body was warming Sakura. It felt nice. She mumbled quietly, "Do you think Naruto will be all right?"

Kakashi didn't like thinking about Naruto, at least not for the last few days. "I think we'll know by next week. I'm not sure how long it will take Sasuke to bring Naruto back, considering the chance that he might have been injured. We also don't know if anyone from his team was killed, or even if he was with them. Akatsuki's numbers were dwindling, but I still don't feel…good about leaving. But I couldn't stay. We had to get out. I didn't have enough power left to get you both, so Sasuke offered to get Naruto. I guess he would have offered to take you, but you were already in my arms so…"

Sakura nodded silently. She understood. Kakashi hid his face in her hair, taking in her scent. "Are you hungry?" he asked.

"Huh?"

"Are you hungry?" he repeated. "I'm starving."

"Yeah," she said. "How long has it been since we ate?"

"Too long. During our second day in that cage, they gave us some sort of liquid diet meal."

"Oh." She hadn't known that.

Kakashi went to pull away, but Sakura's fingers held onto him. He smiled down at her. "I'll be right back," he promised.

"But you'll be cold," she complained. "It's raining. At least take your shirt."

"No," he said. It wasn't negotiable either. "You have to keep that on. You'll freeze if you don't. Your clothes are all torn. They're rags now."

Ah. Well…how was she supposed to argue with that? "Just stay. We can eat later."

"Sakura, you need to eat. You need to get your strength back."

"So do you."

He smiled. "Exactly. So we should eat. Both of us."

He had won. That bastard. She grunted, "Fine."

He kissed her forehead before he left.

Sakura lay in the dark room, listening to the rain and waiting for Kakashi's return. She felt like he was taking longer than necessary, but that could have just been her imagination. She didn't know the area well, so she had no knowledge of the distances.

But if they were in a storage shed then a house must have been nearby. Kakashi could have just stolen food from there. But he wouldn't do that. Especially not if they were home, which they probably were due to the storm. Couldn't he just ask for some then? On second thought, that would probably have been a very bad idea. A shirtless man with grey hair who looks like he should be in his twenties coming up and asking for food during a thunderstorm was not what Sakura had initially pictured. And Kakashi wasn't _able_ to look homeless. The fact that he looked so well-fed, and muscled, didn't help.

Still, it was worth a shot, right? Nah. Then they would have checked the shed.

Sakura was startled when the door pealed back unexpectedly and a wet Kakashi climbed through. Why hadn't the man made any squishy noises? There must have been tons of mud outside. Did he really feel the need to be so quiet? Ugh.

Sakura rolled onto her back and pushed herself up with some effort. Thankfully, the hay tilted up into a slant behind her, so it supported most of her weight. Kakashi flopped down and crossed his legs, a basket falling against his knees. His grin proved that he was happy with his findings. Sakura rolled her eyes at him. "So, what did you get?"

"I found a bakery," he informed her. "The bread is buttered and still hot."

Oh, he could have been an angel. "And?"

"A bit of fruit, rice, fish, and…chocolate."

That pause had definitely been for dramatic effect.

Sakura held out her hand. "Give me."

Kakashi laughed and tossed her a bread roll. As she began to eat that, he laid a long white cloth across her knees and added an arrangement of the other foods he had brought. He gave her all of the chocolate. It was way too sweet for him. As soon as Sakura had finished her bread, she moved on.

Kakashi seemed to fade into the background as Sakura ate. About halfway through, when the food hit her stomach, she felt it flip. That's right. She hadn't eaten in a few days. Ouch. "Did you get anything to drink?"

He continued munching on an apple as he slid her the canteen. Sakura heard water sloshing in it. She took careful sips and sat back to allow her stomach a moment to settle. She could have sworn she saw Kakashi laughing at her from the corner of her eye, but when she looked, he was suddenly intent on the fish he was eating. She couldn't blame him. She would have had the same sadistic pleasure if their situations had been switched, but they weren't, so she could still feel a little bitter towards him.

She noticed that Kakashi ate in silence. She wondered if it was because of all those years of eating alone or with his back turned to everyone else. Possibly. It was interesting watching him. She still wasn't used to seeing his face. She doubted she ever would be. It still surprised her. The features just weren't the ones she had always imagined Kakashi to have. The lips were plumper than she had pictured. For some reason, she had always given him Ibiki's thin, hard lips. And his nose was straighter. Only his jaw was the same. Defined and cocky, like representing the spirit of a young man. It felt to odd to see it represented by Kakashi.

"It's rude to stare," he teased.

Her eyes narrowed slightly and she forced her blush back down. "Bite me."

"Don't give me any ideas."

Ugh. "You're such a pervert."

He smiled at her, and he suddenly looked dashing. Raindrops slid down the long strands of his hair, still holding in spikes that seemed to have a stubbornness against gravity, and his eyes crinkled in a familiar yet new smile. "You wouldn't have me any other way."

She answered immediately. "Or so you think."

He pouted. "Don't be so mean."

She glanced at his food, only to see it was gone. _Of course_, he would finish before talking. "Then don't be so dirty."

"Biting isn't dirty," he said. "I could tell you what's really dirty."

"I don't want to know."

"Of course not. You want to stay as innocent as possible, don't you? Well, that's fine with me. I love that about you."

She didn't answer. She didn't know how to.

"I also love your blush."

"Shut up."

He laughed at her, and she threw a peach at his head.

--

"You're an idiot." That was Tsunade's greeting.

"I know."

"You know better than this."

"I know."

"Then say something else, damn it."

"What is there to say?" he asked, staring down at the corner of her desk. "You've gotten the whole story, I presume from Sakura, so you know what happened."

"This is your one shot to defend yourself," she told him. "Don't waste it."

"My judgment was clouded and I made a mistake because of it. I deserve my punishment."

Sake and papers splattered across the floor as Tsunade stood up in a fury, her chair making a sliding thud behind her. "You left Naruto!"

"I know."

"You're an idiot."

He didn't answer.

"Why?" Tsunade demanded. "You never make mistakes like this."

"I told you," he said calmly. "My judgment was clouded. It doesn't often get clouded, but it when it does…I'm usually put in situations where I have to be rational, where it's a do or die thing, so when I falter…bad things happen."

"Quit with the pity-party," his Hokage growled. "You're given that burden because you _are_ capable of carrying it. What changed?"

His heart. "Nothing," he lied smoothly.

"Kakashi."

He looked up, meeting her eyes. "Can we discuss this later?"

"What?" He couldn't be serious.

"It will give you time to come up with a suitable punishment, and me time to word my defense in a way that will make me seem like less of an idiot."

"Nothing can do that."

"Yes, because I'm an idiot."

"Yes, you are."

"Of course."

"Damn it." Tsunade kicked her chair back up with her heel and sat down in it heavily. "You never make mistakes like this. You knew the score."

"I know."

She shook her head once, and then started rubbing her forehead, looking out the windows. "You don't sound like you regret it."

"I regret not being able to help more, but I don't regret taking Sakura."

Tsunade bit her lip. "How could _you_ have been so foolish?"

Time to try the mini-lie. "I already had her in my arms. We only had seconds, and with the drugs and the noise, I wasn't thinking clearly."

"Obviously." She sighed. "What jutsu did you use to get out of there?"

"Hm?"

"Kakashi, don't play dumb."

He was silent for a moment before he started playing with the metal guard on the back of his glove, tracing the Konoha symbol. "You're on the right track," he told her. "The forbidden one. The Hatake one."

Tsunade closed her eyes. "You know what that jutsu does to you. You aren't yourself for days after using it, Kakashi. Were you really that desperate?"

"Tai-jutsu alone wouldn't have been enough," he explained. "It was the only jutsu strong enough to flush my system clean without destroying my body when I activated it."

She nodded. "I know that. I understand that. I just don't understand why you would take Sakura and leave Naruto behind when…and leaving him with Sasuke. What a fool you are."

"Sasuke will come back," he said. "It was always obvious that he wouldn't know what to do with his life after Itachi's death. Where else can he go? His only chance is to come here. Bringing Naruto back would prove his loyalty and lessen his punishment, perhaps even make it so that people are capable of welcoming him back. It's his chance to prove himself to us."

"That's not enough to have made you leave him." She said it so that it seemed dull, quiet, and yet rang with a fierce truth.

He couldn't tell her yes, not yet. He had to find Sakura. "Can we continue this later?"

"What's so important that you have to leave now?" Tsunade said in a hard voice.

He wanted to breath 'everything', but couldn't find it in his heart, in his courage, to do so. "I want to talk to Sakura," he said, telling her the truth quietly. "I'm worried about her. She's still in the hospital, right?"

Tsunade eyed him, her gaze reading his face once. "What else is there?"

He sighed. "I need to ask her permission for something."

Tsunade's slim eyebrows descended, shading her eyes. "And what could that possibly be?"

"Nothing relevant to this," he assured her, straying from the truth. "But, regardless, it still needs to be done."

"Fine," she said, dismissing him with a wave of her hand. "You have fifteen minutes. Make it quick."

Kakashi bowed before leaving.

Sakura was in the Konoha hospital recovering from the devastating drugs and the wounds inflicted on her body that she had been unable to heal. They had only been home for half a day, but Sakura had been admitted immediately. Kakashi had put off reporting to Tsunade, who was stuck in her office. The air had been oddly dry that week. It still remained so, slightly burning to Kakashi's lungs. It hadn't rained here in a while. He supposed he should have been grateful for that, considering how bad Rain country had been, but he found himself waiting for the next Konoha shower.

The walls of the hospital were visible, white and hard. He pushed the door aside, stepping into the air conditioned room. The chill felt wonderful, though not calming. His need to see Sakura had not lessened or changed. He walked pass the desk, waving to the nurses and disregarding the rules. He didn't need to sign in. Or, he felt he didn't need to, and no one was going to tell him otherwise.

Sakura had gained consciousness. She had been knocked out when the medics had needed to go through certain procedures, ones that might have been painful had she been awake. He smiled at her and shut the door behind him.

"How did it go with Tsunade?" Sakura asked, returning his smile.

He sighed, pulling up the lone visitor's chair. "Well, it's not over yet. We're taking something of a break."

"Oh. Why?"

Kakashi grinned. "Because she needs to come up with my punishment for leaving Naruto, of course."

Sakura frowned at him. That hadn't been his fault. If anything, it was hers. "There's more to it," she said. "Tell me."

Kakashi took her hand, turning it over and tracing patterns across her palm. "Tsunade…isn't satisfied with my explanation. She knows there's something else."

But Tsunade wasn't aware of their relationship. Sakura sighed. "What are you going to tell her?"

"What can I?" he asked quietly. "I won't say anything that would make you unhappy, that would potentially harm you."

"Then you're left in a rut, huh?" Sakura mumbled.

"Yeah, something like that." Kakashi felt like a moron. He could bring himself to ask her. He knew that he wouldn't. How were you supposed to ask a girl if you were allowed to tell her boss that you love her? How did that work? Kakashi didn't have the answers.

Sakura's hand closed over his. "What are we left with?"

"I don't know," he answered.

There was a moment of silence. "Would telling her make any difference?"

Kakashi wanted to groan. Instead, he spoke as his thoughts formed. "It might. There's no guarantee of anything. I was actually avoiding asking about that, because I know that it could probably cause more trouble that it's worth. Especially now."

"Kakashi, it will be all right," she whispered. "Everything will be fine, remember?"

He had promised her that. Kakashi nodded, grinning in an attempt to comfort her. "Of course it will. We knew this was going to be hard, and we knew that facing Tsunade about it was going to be scary. I just didn't think that Tsunade would be the first to find out. I guess I wasn't really prepared for that."

Sakura smiled softly. "Yeah, me neither."

Kakashi's courage was coming back. "At least I'll take the brunt of it."

"Yeah, at least there's that."

Kakashi chuckled.

"So we're okay?" Sakura asked quietly.

Kakashi stood up. He leaned over and kissed her forehead. "We're okay. We'll be fine. I need to get back."

Sakura nodded. "Promise you'll come back?"

"As soon as I regain consciousness."

"She won't be that bad."

"We'll see."

Sakura sighed before releasing his hand and letting him go.

Tsunade was surprised to see him back so quickly. She sat behind her desk, pushing papers to the side and waiting. At least she had regained some form of patience. Kakashi sat down in the seat that had been laid out. He assumed Shizune had been the one to do it. No one else here was so thoughtful. After a second's thought, he changed his mind. That chair was now a weapon.

"Ready?" Tsunade asked, her voice strangely calm. "Did you get your _permission_?"

"Yes, ma'am."

"Then get on with it."

Kakashi swallowed, steadying his voice. "I'm not entirely sure how to start."

Her honey eyes darkened.

"Well, what I mean to say is, it's strange. Hard to believe, really."

"What is it?" There was a demand, not a request, deep in her throat.

Kakashi squared his shoulders, preparing himself for the beating. "I fell in love."

--

Sakura jumped as a loud stomping echoed from further down the hall. Someone was grunting, and another was growling. Her door flew back to reveal Tsunade. A shiver of fear ran through her, but it was too early. The real fear struck when she saw Kakashi hunched over, being dragged by his collar. There was a dark red spot matting his silver hair, and a stream of that blood rolling down his cheek. His headband had been lost.

"What did you do to him?" she whispered.

"Don't give me that," Tsunade spat. "What the hell did _you two do_?"

It was funny in a strange sort of way how she managed to make something so romantic and joyful seem so filthy. "I'm sorry, Tsunade-shishou," Sakura continued to whisper, unable to regain her voice. "I didn't mean for…"

Tsunade's jaw was tight, and Sakura could almost hear her teeth grinding. For the first time she saw the small drops of blood staining her Hokage's blouse. Her eyes darted back to Kakashi. He didn't need this. His body had gone through so much lately. This was going to break him. Sakura's worry was eating at her very soul.

"Sakura! How could you? _Him_? He's _worthless_."

Sakura might have laughed had the atmosphere been a tad bit lighter. Kakashi's _worth_ to this village was probably what was stopping Tsunade from killing him. But perhaps she had meant his worth to Sakura's well being. "I couldn't help it. It wasn't our fault."

Tsunade let go of Kakashi and he fell to his knees. He hadn't looked up since they had arrived, and he still didn't now. The worry was going to kill her. But perhaps not as soon as her fear would. Tsunade towered over her, placing her hands on either side of Sakura's body. Her gaze was black. "Did he fuck you?"

Sakura had an unexpected spark of bravery. Her eyes slid back to Kakashi, and they did not leave. She had an overpowering urge to get to him, to help him.

"_Sakura_."

"Yes," she answered. "_We _did."

Tsunade's body began to shake in her rage. Her eyes closed as she tried to control it, or at least tame it enough so that she didn't smack Sakura and send her detached head flying through the stone wall. "And you morons thought that would just be a _brilliant_ idea, huh? Do you have any clue…No, you couldn't possibly. And Kakashi wouldn't care."

"What is it?"

Sakura actually could hear Tsunade's teeth grind in her answer. "First, he leaves Naruto. Then, he fools around with you, his student. And of course for both situations he decides to leave it up to fate to determine the outcome. It's like he made sure that he was guaranteed no possibility of ever becoming Hokage."

Of all the things she could be pissed about, it was this that ranked above the others? "I don't understand," Sakura admitted.

"He was next in line. He was meant to replace me."

"He was?"

"Well he didn't know!" Tsunade yelled. "Not for sure. He never wanted to be Hokage, I get that, but to make mistakes like these?"

"So he…put you in a situation where you have no options," Sakura mumbled to herself.

"No," Tsunade grunted. "He put this village in a situation where it is left with less-than-satisfactory options. He was the best choice, and now he isn't even a candidate. And none of us know if Naruto will even survive."

"And you?" Sakura asked in a whisper.

Tsunade's eyes glazed over. "I don't have much time left."

All of those years had finally taken their toll. Her jutsu had killed her, and now it was only a matter of time before she met her end. Sakura's eyes burned, but her tears did not come. Not in her presence, she promised herself silently. She swallowed. "So what are we going to do?"

Tsunade sat down on the edge of the bed heavily. "I don't know."

She sounded hopeless.

Sakura knew that the tension she felt was plainly written on her face, but she didn't have the energy to hide it. She turned her gaze back to Kakashi, and was surprised to find him on his hands and knees, as steady as any rock, wiping something from his eye.

"Fuck," he grunted, leaning back and balancing on his knees to use both hands in getting what was obviously blood out of his eyes.

"So you're back?" Tsunade asked, her voice hard again.

"I was never out." Kakashi looked up at her. He made an amused sound before using his hands to push himself off the floor, landing on his feet. It wasn't his most agile feat, but it was a small display. When he turned his eyes back to them, Sakura couldn't look away from the red smeared across his face. His mask was so dark it hid the rest of it. All in all, he looked very healthy. Odd.

"The village will be fine," he said. "I'll make sure of that."

It wasn't the only promise he would die to keep, but it was the only one that he would break his other promises for. Sakura knew that, and understood it, and so in that moment he seemed more a true hero than anyone else in her world.

"And how to do you expect to do that?" Tsunade asked. "You took yourself off the roster."

Kakashi sighed, but there were the obvious indentions of a tired smile beneath his mask. "The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy."

"Yeah, and where do you 'stand'?"

His eyes creased as he grinned. "There's more than one way of going about something."

Tsunade's eyebrow twitched. "Care to explain to the rest of the class?"

"Not really. If I did, it would seem a lot less impressive when I did it."

Tsunade restrained a growl, breathing a deep breath and standing up. She began to walk towards the door, but as she walked by Kakashi she put a small, feminine hand on his shoulder. Her voice was soft. "I trust you. I've seen so much that I know without a doubt that I can. Just don't make mistakes you can't fix, Kakashi. You've seen what that does."

"It wasn't a mistake."

Sakura didn't know whether he was talking about himself or someone else entirely.

With a sad smile, Tsunade left the room.

**This chapter and the next one are shorter than my usual chapters, but I was tired of putting off ending it. Sorry for the wait.**


	10. Chapter 10

**A/N: Yay! Last chapter!**

**Send Me An Angel: Chapter 10**

A week passed. A horrible, stressed, cuss-filled week. Sakura didn't know where anyone was. Kakashi was "busy" and her teammates hadn't returned. It was like being a Gennin all over again. And it sucked.

She lay on her couch staring up at the white ceiling. At least her parents had taken the news well. Or as well as could be hoped. Her father strongly disapproved of her relationship, but her mother hushed him as much as possible. It was safe to say she wasn't going to be taking Kakashi to any family dinners any time soon. She couldn't really picture him comfortable in that kind of environment, even though she knew that he would look pleasant and be well-spoken and polite. It was simply in his nature to deceive people.

Her doorbell rang, loud and annoying. "Come in," she called. "It's unlocked."

A serious-looking man stepped through her doorway, dressed in full Anbu attire. He wasn't one she recognized -- definitely not one who had come to retrieve her when Kakashi had had his gut blown out. But the rush was still in his eyes. "Your presence is requested," he stated formally. "Hokage-sama is announcing a temporary replacement, and all Jounin are to attend the meeting."

Sakura stood up, and nodded. "When?"

"Now."

Well, Anbu was known for not wasting time. The man made a gesture for her to follow him, and then quickly exited her apartment. As she trailed him, she thought of how strange it was that the meeting had been held secret until the last minute. She also wondered why she was having a personal escort. Sakura hoped that some of her questions would be answered before the end of the night.

The streets were still alive with people, most of who were probably returning home. Sakura caught a glimpse of a group of Anbu dispersing on the roof of a nearby building, but her eyes were too slow to see which direction any of them had went. Her own Anbu remained silent, but started to cut through narrow streets, leading her towards a more rural part of Konoha. The sky darkened quickly. He finally stopped when they had arrived at a forest with a few shacks built surrounded by trees. He led her to one of them, and then rushed her inside quietly. There were stairs that led downward, disappearing into darkness. He urged her forward, keeping her in front of him. Sakura kept her hand pressed to the wall to give her comfort and balance, although she was sure that her escort did not.

At least now she understood the need for an escort. She would not have been able to find this place on her own.

The stairs ended at a regular wooden door. Sakura paused, waiting on her Anbu. He slid past her, producing a key she wasn't able to see, and opened the door. The room inside spread across a wide expanse. Sakura was fully aware that they were underground, and the lights hanging from the ceiling did nothing but confirm that. There were wires across the rocks and pipes which she didn't know the function of. A good deal of people were crowded into the space, but Sakura could see that in the front was a platform. A warm golden light lit that corner, contrasting with the dim, sickly yellow lighting the rest of the room. That was where the speech was to be held, no doubt.

The Anbu nudged her elbow and pulled her alongside the crowd, keeping close to the outer wall. When they had crossed most the room, nearly to the other side, he turned and led her through the crowd towards the front. In a moment, she was able to see a small tent set up next to the platform. It almost reminded her of the Chunin exams, when the contestants had gotten their scrolls.

"Hokage-sama requested that you be close," her Anbu whispered in explanation. "So did her replacement."

Sakura bit her cheek. "It's Kakashi, isn't it?"

The Anbu nodded a stiff, respectful nod. "Of course."

"Figures," Sakura mumbled, looking at the ground and preparing for the wait. "When's it to start?"

"Any moment now."

Oh. "Thank you."

Sure enough, a few people came onstage, but they seemed to be setting up things. As they finished, the lighting around the stage got brighter. Sakura stayed put, even when her Anbu left. She wondered for a moment if she would regret not asking his name, but then she figured that it would have been a code name anyway. No loss.

Ibiki and Anko came up, Anko toying with the microphone. Ibiki pushed both her and the technology aside. "You all know what has been going on," he said in his deep, commanding voice. "There are no secrets there. What you aren't aware of is that our Hokage has fallen ill, and a new replacement must be chosen. Not a new Hokage, but someone to overlook her position until a suitable successor is found. Because of the elders and other councils, it's been decided that a vote will take place. Your choices are Danzo and Hatake Kakashi. Be under no prejudices. Choose who think would best represent and care for this village and all off its people."

He turned away and left, jumping down from the stage into the dark beneath it. Anko's mouth twitched in annoyance. Sakura could only guess that Ibiki had said everything, and that she was left with nothing of importance to announce. But she rolled her eyes and held the microphone up to her mouth. "In the southeast corner of the room, there is a voting box. Tsunade is in there to make sure no one…cheats. When your name is called, please report to the tent to cast your vote." She grinned and waved before hopping down.

Sakura would be lying if she said she wasn't surprised that Anko made a beeline straight for her. For some reason, Sakura found herself very aware of the woman's cleavage. Even in the dimly lit room, she could see as perfectly as if she were holding a flashlight to them. Anko threw her arm around Sakura's shoulder and ducked her head low. "Kakashi's in the tent, too. I could go get him, see if you two want to have some more fun?"

Sakura's back stiffened and her cheeks burned. "How do you know about that?" she whispered, her voice harsh. "Did he tell you?"

Anko snorted. "Kakashi doesn't talk about his sex life. Ever. Not with me at least."

Sakura couldn't say that surprised her either. "Then how do you know?"

Anko's mouth turned up in a sharp, creepy smirk. "There are times when a woman just knows things."

Sakura forcefully stopped herself from shivering. She didn't want everyone to find out from _Anko_. She would no doubt make it sound so dirty that there would be no chance of redemption for her or Kakashi. She bit her cheek. "Keep quiet about it, okay? I've got some things I need to handle before the gossip mill gets started."

Anko's eyes sparkled with mischief. Sakura glared at her.

"What's all the fuss?" Asuma asked, walking towards them with one hand in his pocket, his other holding his cigarette. "Is Anko teasing you for sleeping with Kakashi?"

Sakura growled. Did _everyone_ know?

Asuma held his hands in front of him defensively. "Sorry, sorry. I know he's not that good, but, man, he must've really sucked to put you in this bad of a mood."

Sakura smiled tightly, wickedly. "Kakashi is an excellent lover. There's no need to refer to that."

Asuma sighed. "I thought him being drunk would help make us look a little better."

Sakura shook her head. "How do you two _know_?"

Asuma stared at her for a long time. He sighed and put his hand on her shoulder. "Sakura, we were there. When we left, we kind of had to shut off the radio, you know? And I don't think there was any other thing you could have been doing to make those kinds of noises."

Sakura hid her face in her hands. This embarrassment would fade, right? It would go away in time. She had to tell herself that.

"Your name was just called," Anko told her, grinning. "You'd better get going. I hear Kakashi doesn't like to be kept waiting."

Sakura slapped the woman's arm before marching towards the tent, satisfied that Anko would bruise. She stepped in, trying desperately to relax her rigid muscles. She saw Tsunade and Kakashi, sitting side by side in front of a table next to a plain gray box with a small circle shaped hole in the top. Kakashi was leaning forward, his cheek in his hand. "Did you hear that?" she asked, still angry.

"Every word," he said, laughing quietly.

"Do you think that's _funny_?"

"Just your reaction to it," he clarified. "Sakura, did you honestly think they wouldn't know? It would be kind of hard to hide something like that from nosy, capable elite shinobi. It's best that they already know, and that they aren't making a big deal out of it."

Sakura huffed and stomped up to the binder lying open on the table. She tore off her slit of paper and scribbled Kakashi's name down on its yellowed front. She heard Kakashi sigh. "No prejudices, remember?"

Sakura grunted. "Danzo would run us straight into the ground, the radical old bastard. You're not much better, but you'll do. I can keep an eye on _you_ at least."

Kakashi shrugged but let it be. Sakura folded the paper and slipped it into the box. "What are you doing in here, anyway?"

"In order for this to be fair," he explained, "people have to know what I've done. They need to know my mistakes and my faults. It was part of the councils' agreement to this."

"Everything?" Sakura asked.

Kakashi smiled at her. "Absolutely."

Sakura shut her eyes tightly.

"You should go speak to your parents. I wouldn't want something like this to ruin my chances with them."

Sakura sighed heavily. "I already have."

Kakashi grinned. Sakura shook her head and stomped away.

"I'll see you tonight," he called, a little too loudly in her opinion.

It was impossible how smoothly things went after that. Despite the knowledge that Kakashi had slept with his student, he still won with over sixty percent of the votes. His honor and respect for him was too deep rooted to be torn by something so insignificant. It wasn't the first time it had happened in the profession, and it certainly wouldn't be the last. Everyone was just glad that she was of age. If she hadn't been…the votes would have been tipped in a different direction. Luckily, that wasn't the case, and Kakashi took over the responsibilities quickly. His efficiency was astounding even to Sakura, who was working as his assistant to train him for the job. He seemed to know more than she did. She asked him about it about halfway through the second day.

"Yondaime was my sensei," was his only reply.

"And what does that have to do with anything?"

He set down his pen and looked up at her. "Do you really think that your teacher is the only one who makes her students work?"

After that it all made sense. Kakashi had always had a natural talent for anything that he did, but experience helped everybody.

It wasn't until an uproar at the entrance gates that things really came crashing down around them. Naruto and Sasuke were back, and the villagers weren't happy. Sasuke was arrested and thrown in jail before Kakashi had even caught word of their arrival, and Naruto was immediately taken to the hospital. That was where they parted. Kakashi went to the prison and Sakura to the medical headquarters.

Kakashi was quite happy with what he found. Sasuke was sitting in the corner of a cell. His shit was ragged and his face was dirty, but he had a content look in his eyes. Kakashi demanded that the guards leave, and then he turned back to Sasuke. He dragged a seat up and sat opposite of him. "So, are you home for good, or is it right that I keep you in here?"

"I'm not leaving," Sasuke said quietly. "I always intended to come back. I just didn't know if it were ever going to be a possibility."

Kakashi smiled. "You do know that you have to prove yourself just a bit more before I can let you out, right?"

Sasuke didn't answer. He knew it.

"Right, well, here's what I propose," Kakashi continued. "First, we submit your case of bringing Naruto back alive. Barely, but still. Next, we keep you in here for a minimum of two months. You have to have exceptional behavior, of course, and then we may be able to release you. You'll have to stay under house arrest, I'm guessing, but it's a start."

"Did you just think up all of that crap?"

Kakashi shrugged. "It seemed as good a plan as any."

Sasuke sighed. "Guess so." He smirked. "I heard you're the new Hokage. I haven't gotten a chance to congratulate you yet."

"I'm the _temporary_ Hokage. I'm just in until Naruto gets up and running. We're going to send him over to each of the nations after some office training, and then we'll see how soon we can commission him."

"That sounds about right."

"We thought so."

"So this is how it's going to be?"

"I think this is how it's going to have to be." Kakashi got up. "I'll convince them that there's no need to send you to lockdown."

"Thanks."

"Just don't screw this up."

After that pleasant visit, he went straight to the hospital. The lady behind the desk in the front told him immediately upon his entrance what room Naruto and Sakura were located in. On the way up he wondered if that would have been the case had he not been named 'Hokage.' He supposed it would.

Naruto was in bed. He was conscious though, and showing all the signs of his upbeat spirit. Kakashi smiled. "You'd better recover quickly. We have a lot to do."

Naruto seemed to comprehend. "Yeah, I figured. You don't like your new position much, do you?"

Kakashi shut the door behind him and leaned against the wall. "It's all right. The money's good, even if I do get arthritis from all these--"

"Important documents and treaties," Sakura finished, cutting him off. He had taken to down talking almost everything about his job in her presence. She hadn't yet figured out why. She turned back to Naruto. "Are you sure that you're feeling well? It's just so soon."

"Yeah, Sakura quit worrying so much. I've always healed fast."

"But that was when you had the Kyuubi in you," she pointed out.

"And you think I'm not as strong as I was before?" he challenged.

"No, that's not what she meant," Kakashi said softly. "The Kyuubi's power is what healed you so quickly before, but it's not what made you strong. You got that way on your own, far before you were capable of tapping into the fox's chakra."

Naruto nodded, grinning and proud. "I've still got the sage-mode, you know. I'll be back to full throttle in no time."

Sakura smiled at him and gently bid him to lie back down and rest.

-

Since his father's death, he had never truly felt human. It was always hard, pushing and striving and proving himself. There was never time to rest, and when there was a false moment, it ended in some tragedy that he would never forget. It was unfair in that sense. So unfair. So cruel. Still he could not back down, could not retreat. There was always a dark cloud around him, always a mask to conceal the pain and anger. But what if that cloud disappeared? What if there was no longer a reason to hate his existence?

There was.

And she was here.

He ran his fingers across her smooth cheek, his touch ever so light. His eyes could not leave hers. They had no wish to view anything outside of that emerald complexity. She captivated him as no woman had ever done before, and he felt himself crumbling to her will. Whether she realized it or wanted it, he didn't know. All he knew was that there was no one whose company he craved more, or whose voice he longed to hear, or whose touch could soothe him so easily. She was as perfect as any one being could be. At least to him. But in his mind the rest of the world didn't matter. He kissed her softly, listening for that sigh that always came. He smiled. "I want to ask you something."

"What is it?" she asked distractedly, her fingers tangled in his shirt and her eyes closed.

He was quiet for a moment before kissing her again, this time much more deeply, with a passion that was familiar. "Marry me," he whispered to her.

It took a second for Sakura to realize that she had stopped breathing.

He pulled away and cupped her face. His eyes were earnest. "Not right now, of course, just…someday. I have to know that that's a possibility."

Sakura felt her chest shake.

"Sakura, I love you, you know that."

Her lips trembled with the effort to speak.

Kakashi leaned his forehead against hers. "I just can't imagine living my life with anyone else. I can't even imagine trying. You have to know that. If nothing else, you have to know _that_. I don't think I could live without you. Not now, not ever. And I--"

Sakura's fingers lay lightly on his lips. She looked up at him. "I know," she said softly.

His eyes looked at her pleadingly. He needed some answer.

"We still have time?" she asked.

"Of course," he answered tenderly, slowly.

She smiled at his uneasiness. "And you're not going anywhere?"

"There's nothing interesting enough to ever take me away from you."

"Kakashi, you don't have you say things like that. This isn't the way you normally talk."

He sighed and pulled away, running his hand through his hair in frustration. "It's just…I've never…"

"What?"

"I've never wanted something so badly. I don't know exactly what to do or say, but I know what I want. It's you. It's always been you."

Sakura wrapped her arms around his wait. "Yes."

"What?"

"I want to marry you."

In second Kakashi's face went from confusion to comprehension. It lit up. His eyes shone and a smile of pureness played at the edges of his lips. "Really?"

"Don't make me say it again." Sakura frowned. "I don't want to marry young. In a few years we'll go for it. Until then, let's keep things the way they are. It had better last that long," she warned.

Kakashi grinned. "It'll last forever."

Sakura huffed.

Kakashi kissed the edge of her mouth. "But you do realize that we're engaged, right?"

"Shut up."

**I sincerely hope that you were satisfied reading this story.**


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